Brad Makes Fermented Citrus Fruits

Action, a little more energy please, thank you.

I will do a little intro.

I was gonna say, go in places.

I don't even remember how we do these.

[laughing]

All right, here we go, action.

Hey guys, today in It's Alive,

we're going to be doing a little fermented citrus.

A little lacto fermented citrus.

It's kinda a riff on like a preserve lemon,

preserve citrus kind of thing, packed in salt,

where it gets kinda, you know.

We're gonna be foolin' around with a few different types.

Real simple process.

A little big of salt, vacuum bag, room temperature,

controlled rot, let's get goin'.

Oh, that's the disgusting.

I'm gonna give that a little rinsey poo.

You gotta take care of your tools man.

I don't care what it is, you know,

if it's a pencil.

Or a vacuum sealer.

Or a printing press.

You gotta take care of your tools man.

I talk to myself a lot.

[upbeat music]

All right, oh before we get,

before we get going, I have a little bone to pick.

Amiel Stanek, that kooky guy,

he was all fired up about this fermentation experiment.

And it was cool, I was into it too.

I was like yeah, I like this.

But he did it, and he put it in this jar,

and we popped it over in the fermentation station.

And boy oh boy, he forgot about it.

I went over there today, I was like wagh hauh.

I forgot about it.

It's been, I mean weeks, if not maybe a month or two.

Yeah, I looked in there man, and it went rogue.

It's gone bio warfare on us.

I'm not gonna clean it,

but I wanted to, I wanted to call him out

on It's Alive.

I ain't opening it.

No, this is a sealed unit bud.

Uh uh, trust me, no ones wants it.

You go in there man, I might get spores in the face.

Look a left a little peep view.

That ain't supposed to be there,

it's not like some weird scoby.

Just because it's a controlled rot,

doesn't mean you need to neglect it.

Oh, a little bit came out there,

it was disgusting.

[upbeat music]

We're gonna do some kumquats.

And this is all by weight.

If you don't have yourself a little digital scale,

it's a fantastic tool to invest in.

And I like to do things by grams, you know,

real precise.

It's just the way it should be.

Don't even get me started.

What's that, 230, 240, 248.

All right, we'll call that,

oh I'll take the small one out,

and put a big one in.

250, remember that.

I thought you were leaving, Gaby.

[Gaby talking in background]

All right kumquats.

First move, oh you like that, right.

That's the new big boy.

Look at that bad ass, huh.

Yeah, the big boy.

It's the upgraded version of the original.

I've still got that one,

I'll never let go of that knife.

I love that knife.

But here's a little more, a little high performance model.

Nice kumquats.

And I'm gonna halve them,

and then we're gonna take the seeds out.

This is just like a fancy chopstick,

like a plating chopstick.

It's actually Morocco's, I borrowed it.

Without asking.

[Chris] Uh huh.

Chris, you mind if I use your little chopstick?

It's cool, I used your knife too open up a can.

It's all good, buddy.

Yes, I just use that, you poke in there,

and you try to hit out, you know, the little obvious ones.

Boom, see ya.

Poom, kind of a silly name, but, kumquat,

who thought of that?

Oh you know, that looks like a kumquat.

[laughing]

It's gettin' a little warm in here.

Anna Stockwell showed up to work today.

I don't know where the hell everyone else is.

[Gaby] I'm here!

Gaby, you came in late, you're leavin' early.

[Gaby] Yeah!

Yeah.

[Gaby] Livin' the life.

Livin' the life, that test kitchen manager life.

Yeah, well Gaby got in here, you know,

no, she's done a great job.

She got rid of a lot of stuff that I've been hoarding

for years, but she reorganized a lot of things,

and I don't know where the hell like anything is anymore.

I'm saying, how you hid everything.

Like oh the juicers, the citrus juicers were here.

[upbeat music]

Um, all right, so the blood orange.

The blood orange, I nip off the tops.

Look at that bad boy, it's a beaut.

Let's get a weight on that bad boy.

146, let's just say 150, what the hell.

And I like to do things by grams, you know, real precise.

And then we just do a little slicely slice.

A little ringy ring.

I've never done the blood orange one before.

We're gonna learn together with this one.

Oh Brad, what are you doing?

Oh no, you got it.

If this will work out, we'll see how it reacts, you know.

This might kind of fall apart and get weird,

just because of how much segment there is,

how much water content, juice is in there.

And, but that's cool, we can use the liquid too.

Should we do, yeah, let's do limes.

220 on the lime.

And what the hell, we'll do a little,

we'll do three Meyer lemons too.

I like Meyer lemons, you know, they're beautiful, a.

They're gorgeous, but some people think,

and I get it, they can kinda get that like

medicinally cleaner product aroma if you would.

Rocco, do you like Meyer lemons?

[Chris] Yeah, I love 'em.

Yeah, right.

[Chris] I don't understand what the big issue is.

What's the problem, right?

[Anna] I love them, too.

Yeah.

[Anna] Yeah.

[Molly] Are there people who do not like Meyer lemons?

They're out there.

Probably Rapo.

[Rocco] They walk among us.

I can't see Rapo liking a Meyer lemon.

Oh 300 on the dot.

The reason we wrote down our weights is because

we're gonna add 2% salt by weight.

So say this is 250 grams.

That's probably an easy number.

250 times .02, five grams of salt.

All right, we'll flyin' right through this.

150 times .02, that's like one of the only things

I remember from math class in school,

is how to find percentages of numbers.

Oh [beep], 150 times .02, three grams.

Boom, all right, we're flying.

Two, two, I feel like I'm flyin' through a test.

You know like when, a lot of you probably feel

or felt this way often, but I didn't.

When you were takin' a test, and you were like

you knew the answers, yeah that [beep] is A.

Yeah, it's a b, I'm 100% sure.

And you like feel good, you're all pepped up,

not depressed, after you take a test.

It wasn't often.

You're back.

[Brad] Whoo.

Whoo, slow clap.

Now what do you mean slow clap?

Like an 80s slow clap.

Oh are we beatniks now?

And then it like picks up, like

You [beep] Can't Buy Me Love.

Let's get the rights so we can play the clip.

[laughing]

You know what I'm talking about.

All two of us.

No, you don't [beep] know.

Everyone was born in the nineties.

Yeah, I was born in 85 sir.

I was born in 80.

You guys don't know.

No big deal, I was in eighth grade when you were a senior.

[Anna] I was born in '86.

Boom, all right, the kids ain't here.

You know Can't Buy Me Love?

Slow clap, after he gives his speech.

Slow clap my ass.

All right, here we go.

Old man Morocco.

Hold on, I'm pulling it up.

Oh please do.

Okay, kumquats, five grams.

Boom, let that hang out.

Next trick, three grams, oh nailed it.

That was a three gram pinch.

That right there is what you call a three gram pinch.

First of all, is this guy Brian Bosworth?

Hold on, I'm gonna show you.

Not that ad.

Jesus Christ.

It's not even in color.

This is important, is that Brian Bosworth?

I don't know who Brian Bosworth is?

Stone.

Stone?

I'm very disappointed.

No, no, no, he's about to get into a fight.

This looks like a good movie.

He intervenes, his inspirational speech.

Is that John Travolta?

Hands him back the friggin' baseball bat.

Okay, and then watch.

We're tryin' to make our own movie here.

Slow clap right there.

Let's get it goin' guys.

That's the moment, yeah, get it goin'.

Appreciation, I see what you're sayin'.

There, slow clap.

I don't think you understood what I was trying to do there.

I got it, the slow clap, let's get it goin'.

And then it speeds up and everyone's goin'.

But Chris, no one's here.

Only we showed up for work today, bud.

And Anna Stockwell.

And Matt, no, we can't address you.

It's too soon.

[sad music]

Okay, we're gonna add this to this.

Okay, oh no.

Did we ever weigh this?

Did we do that already?

I'm losing my mind.

Did I salt that twice, no?

No, right?

Okay, oh it was 300 on the dot.

Remember that was the one I nailed.

300 for the Meyers.

So 300, what's 2% of 300, slick?

Six, .02, six.

Did you know that?

Me neither.

All right, let's see if we can get a six gram pinch.

That feels good.

Here, oh, let's try that again.

One more time.

I gotta calibrate my pinch.

Six gram pinch coming right up, four.

And now we do a little tossy toss.

Check out the brains on Brad.

What movie is that from, slick?

Perfect, and now we can get ready to ferment.

I'm gonna do, I love cardiacum.

Big, big fan, I got these pods right here.

I'm gonna crush on, ba boom.

And we'll add that to the Meyer lemon.

We'll add that to the kumquat.

Get this outta here.

Put it on Andy's station.

He's on vacation, he's on his 12th vacation this year.

It's April, must be nice, huh.

[upbeat music]

Oh we were in Hawaii.

I'm glad you asked.

Shootin' some just fantastic stories.

Should be, by the time this one comes out,

I think it'll be out already.

So I got this nice here little vacuum sealer.

I like to do a double seal on the ends here.

This takes a little time, but it's not bad.

Because I don't just trust one.

You know we got too much on the line here.

This is what we're gonna do, we're gonna make a little bag.

Vacuum seal it lightly, not just crazy to crush it,

but suck the air out.

And as it ferments, as fermentation does,

it's consuming, little microorganisms are consuming.

And they're giving off, they're giving off carbon dioxide.

Yeah, carbon monoxide, that's the one that kills ya.

I think right, they both can kill ya.

Either way, they're giving off gases.

And then it'll start to puff up the bag.

Oh, hey Rapo.

Hey Brad.

Do you like Meyer lemons?

No, they're terrible.

[laughing]

It's like an air freshener,

a lemonized version of air freshener.

I knew it.

Everyone was like, who doesn't like Meyer lemons?

I go, I bet you Rapo doesn't.

Also, Meyer lemons are so like 1990s Bon Appetit.

Like 1996 Bon Appetit, every recipe had to have like

Meyer lemons and sun dried tomatoes.

96, half our viewers weren't even born yet.

Yeah, that's true.

The readers were though.

Yeah, that's true.

It's 2019, oh [beep].

2019 minus 1996.

Oh, 23, I betcha, 96, Jesus Christ.

You were born in 92?

You gotta a license to operate that camera?

Now it's simple.

We just put our product in the bag.

You gotta watch me do this?

Yeah, it's called a show, Brad.

It's literally what we're doing.

Okay, here we go, here's nothing.

Boom, up at the top here, I'll go for another double seal.

We've gone all this way, we're gonna build up some pressure.

I don't need things poppin' on me, you know,

blowin' a gasket.

Boom, air breaks out, boom, right.

I love the Trailer Park Boys.

We gotta get the Trailer Boys on,

I know Matty's got 'em, he's worked with 'em.

He's Canadian though.

He's got that on me.

You got that on me, Matty.

[upbeat music]

Okay, let's do the blood oranges.

These will lay out nice and delicate

because I think they're gonna.

One, I really let that liquid out.

I'm excited to see how these bad boys come out.

Bad boy.

[upbeat music]

Well being big doesn't necessarily make you bad.

That's the difference.

And bad boy's just bad.

He's nasty, like a junk yard dog.

Bad boy, there we go.

Okay, vacuum seal.

If you wanted to fool around,

if you wanted to put like some crushed seedless

red pepper flake in there, that'd probably be awesome.

Or like a cinnamon stick.

You know what I mean, like food around,

have some fun with it.

This is just an inspirational piece.

Any time, one of 'em!

There's always one, you know what I mean?

There's always one, man.

Oh Delaney.

Oh Leone.

You can't use my.

Back in the saddle man.

You're the villain, Delaney.

You're my villain.

Okay, how does that work, we're both,

what's that called?

How about we just be buds.

Can we just be buds, okay, cool.

Yeah, let's be buds.

We squashed it.

We squashed the beef, right.

I'm just gonna lay these out

in the fermentation station on a sheet tray.

If you wanted to speed this up,

you could lay it out on a sheet tray

with like one of those seeding heat mats under it.

The ones that you can like, you know, sprout seeds from

or folks put them in like their lizard, lizard tanks,

where they keep their pet lizard or whatever.

Lizards don't like you.

They just wish they were big enough to eat you.

Anyway, then we'll come back in,

I'll let you know when to come back.

[upbeat music]

Kill the music, kill the fun.

Get over here.

Oh no, not you, I was yelling at Hundsy, dear boy.

Okay, so we left off.

Should I put these back in the tray?

All right, close your eyes.

Close your eyes, call your mother.

Oh darlin' call your mother.

Call your mother.

Look at that bud, huh.

There's you're little airplane pillow.

So when you fly to someone's wedding,

oh you gotta gift for 'em.

It'll be your travel, oh no,

they probably will definitely not let you on.

This is not gettin' through TSA.

But for fermentation station, it's what we call a success.

We got our kumquats, that kind of look like

sun gold tomatoes.

Our second leader up here with gas give off

is the Meyer lemons.

And then we also did the blood oranges,

which fermented a little less,

but still pretty cool none the less.

And then lastly, and certainly,

they weren't the sexiest limes to begin with,

but these didn't really do much.

They kinda got like an ugly color.

It might be a fail.

But you fail forward, or whatever the saying is.

You know, you learn from things.

So let's cut these bags open and taste our fermented citrus.

And then I'm gonna take some squid.

I'm gonna just a little salt and pepper, olive oil,

grill it up real nice, crispy.

And then we'll slice that cold to make a little

fermented kumquat, herb, squid salad.

Just gonna give a little relief pop, okay.

Woh woh, oh it smells fantastic.

Ah, I mean a, it smells like citrus,

like punch you in the nose.

But it has a little mild hint of like,

little mild hint of alcohol to it as well.

And the texture loses that like bumpy kinda skin

that kumquats or citrus tend to have.

And it looks smooth.

It really does look like a gold grape tomato.

Oh, that's going to be so good on fish, on squid.

I wouldn't even mind puttin' a little slice of that

on a roll at Easter, whoo.

All right.

Oh, that minced up in a little yogurt with some lamb, whoo.

On to the blood orange.

I mean, blood oranges, wow, they're pretty though.

Now the blood oranges are a little weird,

not quite sure what to do with them yet.

But the segment, look at that fruit.

It kept some of those little juice sacs.

I mean it's all right.

I'm not as fired up about it.

I'm not gonna throw it away.

I'll put it in a jar, we'll figure out something

to do with it.

And then lastly, the ugly ducklings, the old limes here.

Eh, I think the thing with the limes is,

or anything that you're dealing,

is getting really ripe ones.

Those were not.

Like I said, I'll pack 'em all in the jars,

but these two by far were just home runs.

And those were the ones that fermented the most.

By gas give off in the bag.

So a little interesting there.

Yeah, so to finish this off,

I'm gonna take one and a half of these kumquats,

and just mince it up.

If you could do this in a mortar and pestle,

I really just want to make a paste.

Then I just got a little shallot.

Just gonna add a little extra virgin olive oil.

Yeah, a decent amount, that's nice, like that.

Oh good catch, you catch that?

Oh, we'll do a little black pepper.

Oh look how good that looks already, huh.

Oh, what, do you want to put that over squid?

Well you're in luck.

I'm just cookin' right here folks.

This is how I like cookin', you know,

you get inspired by what you're doin'.

A little pinch of salty salt.

What, write recipes?

Every now and then, you know, but not too often you know.

I can't write, no.

No, that's not true, I can.

In script too, or cursive,

they don't do that no more, do they?

All right, enough foolin' around.

I'm gonna slice up this squid.

I love squid.

Oh, so tender.

Hot and fast on the grill, boom, boom, boom.

One of the most sustainable creatures in the ocean.

Cold, hot, fried.

I'm like Bubba Gump, but with squid.

Oh, the name of my squiddin' boat?

I don't know, I'd have to really put some thought into that.

I can't just throw that one out there

without thinking about it.

I gotta put some thought into it.

It's spring time here in New York.

I'm gonna try and do a little squid fishin'.

I'd love to make an episode out of it,

but I don't know if we're gonna be able to in time.

We go at night, the lights, duh duh doosh.

Lighting up the sea, and you jig 'em.

They come bee bee bew, dartin' up.

And you catch some nice ones.

[Man] What's jiggin'?

Jiggin', it's like the little bait

where you just duh duh duh.

You know, duh, duh, duh, jiggin'.

All right, we'll add that to our little vinaigrette.

And now we'll add some herbs.

We're just gonna tear it

with my little fingers here.

And this is just fresh parsley, cilantro, and mint.

But you can use any herb you want.

If you got tarragon, you can use that.

I like tarragon.

And then we'll do just a little tossy toss.

Oh that smells good.

Go ahead and take a look at that.

A little more salt, a little more pepper.

Oh Amiel!

[Amiel] Hey Brad.

Hey, you hungry, bud.

[Amiel] Actually, I'm not, but if you want me

to taste something.

Yeah, you want to try something out?

I'm gonna just put it in a little bowl for ya.

Oh wow, you're like plating it up.

This looks nice.

You know, the way you serve food is just a representation

of how you feel and care about the people

that you're feeding.

So I wanted to plate it nice for you

because I care about you, Amiel.

Oh Brad, that's so sweet.

It's good or what.

That's good food.

Good eatin'?

You did a good job.

That's so good.

Like preserved lemon for me is sometimes hard,

it kinda tastes like floor cleaner.

Right, cleaning product, yep.

But this is like much more,

it's lighter and more aromatic.

I would, I'm pretty happy with that.

I'm very happy with it.

Right, you can put that in your magazine.

You should be proud of yourself.

Yeah thanks bud.

Good boy, good boy.

Yeah, thank you.

[laughing]

I almost stabbed myself in the eye.

All right, that was great.

You want to try it by itself.

A little dab will do ya,

and then you just pack 'em in a jar.

Smell that, I mean, come on.

That's wild.

Right, how good is squid, right?

So good.

I was tellin' this guy.

It's like the only thing we should be eating.

That's what I was sayin', one of the most

sustainable fish in the ocean, right.

Is it a fish?

No, it's not a fish, I just don't know

how to pronounce what they are called.

Cephalopods.

That sound right, that does sound right.

Yeah, is that right?

Cephalopods you said?

Yeah.

Yeah, that sounds right, like octopus and cuddle fish.

All the cephies.

And I feel like easy to catch, jig 'em at night.

Yep.

And I feel like a lot of people don't like them.

Jig 'em at night.

Jig 'em at night.

The Brad Leone story.

Ooo, that'd be the name of my boat.

That's good.

Jig 'em at night.

Jig 'em at night.

I like that.

All right, Amiel, thanks bud.

Thank you.

Yeah, thanks for swingin' by.

My pleasure.

Hey Gaby or Molly or anyone,

you guys wanna try something really delicious?

[Molly] Yeah.

That involves controlled rot.

Molly, I know you do.

[Molly] Controlled rot?

Controlled rot, aka fermentation.

Aka flavor.

You're really selling it with the rot.

It looks nice, it's like something Andy would make.

Why, because there's herb in it?

So wait, the squid is what's rotting?

The kumquats.

Oh.

So it's a vinaigrette with fermented kumquat.

Grilled squid, cold.

Hmmm.

Delish.

I want it even colder.

Oh wow.

You know what I mean?

Like ice cold.

Like sea food salad.

Cocktail cold.

I can get into that.

It's really good, Brad.

Yeah, you want to try one by itself?

That's all I get?

You don't need anymore.

Are they really?

I mean you don't need, you can have more if you like.

Oh wow, it's good.

It's like I want to make a vinaigrette

out of this every day.

Exactly, or like even like a mignonette

for an oyster or something.

Mignonette.

That's what I said.

You said minyet.

Do I judge you, Molly?

I feel like yeah.

I made you a snack.

I feel like you're always judging me.

That is not true at all, you can't just say it

because it's fun.

I'm just correcting you.

It's true, I can't pronounce things.

It's fine.

A rotisserie chicken.

Mignonette.

I just, bye Molly.

Gabriella!

[Gaby] What?

I made you a snack.

I have to go and make my own salad.

Here, here's a clean fork.

Oh, what.

I would pay $25 for a plate like this.

$25?

Well, 20.

Oh, all right.

Great, I'm super happy with this.

Such a balance.

This is a really nice dish.

I'm gonna make this again and man,

I think it's just a really easy way to make

a next level kind of vinegarette or a sauce

or mignonette or whatever, minyet, as I like to say.

That'd be awesome with shrimp too.

Or you know what would be really good too,

that little mixed up mash, mix it into a ceviche.

Oh meow.

Next time, I love seafood, I love fermenting things.

And remember, have fun doing it, okay folks.

Bon appetit.

You can have some too, it's quite nice.

I'm so happy, it is a little salty.

That was my fault, I [beep] up.

I'm gonna get you a fork.

Whoa, I'm gonna keep that one.

You know being in front of the camera

is just really kinda therapy for me.

You get a lot of talkin' done, a lot of thinkin' out.

A lot of thinking out, isn't that talking.

[laughing]

You get a lot of thinking out.

[laughing]

I like that, I'm gonna use that from now on,

instead of talkin'.

You know what Gaby's really good at?

Gettin' a lot of thinkin' out.

[upbeat music]