What if James Bond were someone's grandma? Unexpected. I thought this would be a bit fluffy, and it was. But it also went a bit darker than I thought a What if James Bond were someone's grandma? Unexpected. I thought this would be a bit fluffy, and it was. But it also went a bit darker than I thought a book written in the late 60s about a widowed grandmother would go.
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It starts with Mrs. Pollifax recalling a feeling of uselessness so deep that she almost stepped off the roof of her apartment building. Oh. Yeah. That's not good. So it occurs to her that if she has nothing left to lose, she might as well shoot for the stars and pursue her girlhood dream of being a spy. I've often thought I'd become a P.I. or a bounty hunter after all the kids get gone. No one would see my shit coming... And with that in mind, she heads down to the local CIA office and tells them she wants a job. Due to a mix-up, she's brought on board as a courier. All she has to do is go on vacation in Mexico, act like a normal tourist, and then go to a bookshop and ask the owner for a certain book. She then comes home with said book. The end.
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But that would make for a terrible story! In this one, spoilery things happen, and she ends up trapped in an Albanian prison. With her is another spy who ends up badly beaten after interrogation and with a broken leg after a failed attempt to kill himself by jumping off a cliff. She has no training, no real skills, and no hope that anyone is coming to save them. But she does have a set of cards to play Solitare with and a big purse.
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One thing I do think readers should be aware of going in is that this is not an action-packed spy thriller. It actually does have a lot in common with Bond books, though, in that a bit of luck and a lot of determination not to die play a big part in the plot. And while Bond has a smarmy type of sex appeal, Mrs. Pollifax has kick-ass people skills.
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Plus, you know she makes it because there are 14 books in Mrs. Pollifax's series. I don't know that I'll read any more of these because spy stories just aren't my jam. But I'm not sorry that I read this one, either. Recommended for fans of your grandmother's CIA....more
Vera is a 60 year old woman who, despite owning a tea shop and being in great health, is incredibly lonely. And bored. She misses her husband who died Vera is a 60 year old woman who, despite owning a tea shop and being in great health, is incredibly lonely. And bored. She misses her husband who died years ago, and she misses her son who doesn't call her back often enough. <--but that doesn't stop her from leaving unwanted messages telling him what time he should be getting up in the morning, going to bed at night, or that he needs to settle down with a nice girl.
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So when she wakes up one morning to discover that a man crashed through the front door of her shop (with his body!) and then died on her floor? Well, she isn't one to let a good opportunity go to waste. She's going to help the police investigate!
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And what does Vera Wong's idea of help look like? Well, it looks like she will go ahead and draw a chalk outline...in Sharpie. And it also looks like she might have to take a teeny bit of evidence out of his hand before the police get there. BECAUSE SHE'S HELPFUL.
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Ok, this is less about a murder and more bout a quirky character introducing the reader to other quirky characters, and then all of those oddballs forming a quirky little family. It was a sweet story about lies, healing, love, and (of course) murder.
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I will say Vera read like she was quite a bit older than 60 to me. BUT! That's just my opinion and maybe that has been the author's experience with women that age. Or maybe I'm freaking out because I'm edging closer to 60 myself and I still think I'm cool. Then again, I do have a visor...
This is much, much different tone than the 1st Elderly Lady book. Probably most people will like it because Maud seems more human and less psy2.5 stars
This is much, much different tone than the 1st Elderly Lady book. Probably most people will like it because Maud seems more human and less psychotic in this one. I don't know. I miss the stabby Maude.
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Another reason I wasn't all that in love with this second book is that a lot of page time is devoted to this being a travelogue about South Africa. And that's great, except that's not what wanted. I thought I was getting a story about an 89-year-old woman who killed folks that pissed her off, and what I was actually reading was about the beauty and culture of South Africa intermingled with stories that made Maude more loveable. Do you see my problem?
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But like I said, I think most readers will like this one because she makes friends, saves a few people, and does some good stuff this time around. The writing is good, but it is not what I wanted....more
It was ok. I probably wouldn't have been interested in this one at all if the ladies hadn't been oI wanted to like it more than I actually did.
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It was ok. I probably wouldn't have been interested in this one at all if the ladies hadn't been old. Except they didn't seem old! I'm not being agist or whatever, but they acted like they were in their late 30s, not their mid-60s. I'm also really not sure how likely it would be that all 4 of these women would still be active assassins for this organization...until last week. I would think that in any physical job, most field agents would be getting aged into desk jockey seats by the time they are in their 50s - men or women. There are younger people who can move faster than you can at that point. It sucks, but it's true! Speaking of, what are the odds that there's some super-benevolent organization out there that just wants to keep the world safe and trains assassins for this purpose? Are they working for the Justice League or something? I'm suspicious of anything that hokey.
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Plus, the women themselves were kind of box tickers. When it says this book is Golden Girls meets Bond, what it really means is that it's got 4 older women who are assassins, and isn't that just crrrrrazy enough to carry the whole story? Because there really isn't much to differentiate any of them from each other besides the superficial stuff. One is the grieving widow, one is the lesbian, one is the sexpot, and the main character is the "tough" one.
I also thought there would be humor, but the zingers were things like my tits are saggy now! which just didn't make me laugh. Admittedly, it may be because my tits are saggy now and I've already laughed about that enough. Hah. I was sort of expecting more assassin-y humor, like maybe one of them not being able to snipe someone from the rooftop because they forgot their glasses or something. Fuck, I don't know. And I'm not really explaining that very well.
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I think it would have made a better story if someone had come after these women thinking that they were your average AARP members and then found out they had once been ass-kickers. Alas, no. Apparently, their organization wants them dead (for spoilery reasons) and tries to take them out on their retirement cruise. They fight back and unravel the plot behind it all. The reader gets to see the old broads in action while learning about their past. The end. BTW, the reason behind someone wanting them dead was lame. LAME. I can't even...LAME.
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Heads up, audiobook readers! I thought the narration was terrible. I listened to the first 5 minutes or so and turned it off because the narrator's voice was so nasally and grating. Blech. I went ahead and listened to a few other books before finally circling back to this one to give it another shot. Thankfully, there were two narrators - one for the flashbacks to their early careers and one for the present. The lady who read for the present was fine. However, that first narrator nearly killed me. <--pun intended.
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Alright. Don't get me wrong, this wasn't terribly written or anything. And I see a lot of glowing reviews for this thing. I just maybe wanted something different than what it was? If so, that's my fault. I couldn't buy into the organization, the plot, or the personalities of any of the women. I may just be getting picky in my old age, though....more
Do you like old ladies? Maybe more importantly do you like old ladies who just kill the shit out of anyone who causes them problems? If you answered yeDo you like old ladies? Maybe more importantly do you like old ladies who just kill the shit out of anyone who causes them problems? If you answered yes to both of those questions, then go ahead and grab this collection of short stories by Helene Tursten.
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Maude is a mean old bitch. Well, maybe not mean, but you had best leave her the hell alone. And don't even think about fucking with her knickknacks! She likes her life the way she likes her life, and god help anyone who squeaks out a derelict fart that upsets the delicate balance of her day. She's finally managed to get her life ordered the way she wants. She has enough money to travel in the way she wants, to eat what she wants, and be left alone in her home the way she wants. Maude does not play. She will kill you...and then go take a nap.
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This is a darkly funny bunch of short stories, told out of chronological order, and set in Sweden. The translation was excellent and the narration by Suzanne Toren was great. This was one of those books that was recommended to me by a friend on Goodreads, and I'm glad I took the time to check it out. Recommended!...more
I can't believe how hard this one hit me in the feels. Driving down the road listening to the audiobook, tears streaming down my face, making gurgly chI can't believe how hard this one hit me in the feels. Driving down the road listening to the audiobook, tears streaming down my face, making gurgly choking noises, and just praying nobody was going to be home when I walked through the door. Because there's just no good way to explain that you look like a soppy fucking mess over a book without appearing like a slightly unhinged drama llama.
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Honestly, this had one of the most touching scenes I've ever read in my life. If you've read the book you know what I'm talking about. And maybe part of that is because I've been wholly sucked into the world of Cooper's Chase and into the lives of these characters. I love you so much Richard Osman but you're killing me!
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So. The mystery takes a back seat to the emotional journey the characters go on, but this still has all the fun of a Thursday Murder Club story. And even though I did "get" why everyone was after that box of heroin almost immediately, it didn't ruin my enjoyment of the book at all. Because of course, there is always more than one mystery to solve in these, and the little reveals at the end are usually even more fun than the BIG REVEAL.
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The very skinny gist is that you have four pensioners who take on some very dangerous people in order to solve the murder of a friend of Elizabeth's husband, Stephen. And we know they're going to come out on top because that's what they do. Yes, this group has insanely outlandish adventures. But the friendships ring true and the dialogue is hilarious. <--this is what we're all here for, right? If you haven't started on your journey with Joyce, Elizabeth, Ron, & Ibrahim, then I'd suggest you get a move on. Seriously. Go! Highly Recommended.
PS - To whom it may concern, Pleasepleaseplease cast Helen Mirren as Elizabeth when you bring these stories to the big (or small!) screen.
I have been Googling but there's not much there. I got so desperate I even used Bing but the results were the same if a bit slower.- Joyce
I'd forgottI have been Googling but there's not much there. I got so desperate I even used Bing but the results were the same if a bit slower.- Joyce
I'd forgotten Bing was even a browser, so this made me laugh a bit more than maybe it should have.
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The Bullet That Missed was another fantastic installment to the Thursday Murder Club series and (dare I say it?) even better than the first two. These books really do keep getting better and better. I love the 4 main characters and their voices. I love that they're old but instead of sitting around talking about the good old days, they're still out there squeezing every last drop out of life.
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In fact, I love this one so much that I'm finding it hard to give it a proper review. I just want to squeal READIT!READIT!READIT! But that's kind of stupid. You know it and I know it. Anyway. If you're already a fan of this series, you know what I'm trying to say. If you're not a fan...well, that's ok, too. We can still be friends. But you're probably a serial killer, so I'll be keeping an eye on you from here on out. Highly recommended for cozy mystery lovers....more
A lot of people had mentioned to me that Joyce getting Instagram was a highlight of the book, and I have to agree. JoyceEven better than the 1st book.
A lot of people had mentioned to me that Joyce getting Instagram was a highlight of the book, and I have to agree. Joyce navigating anything more advanced than a tv remote is perfection. She my spirit animal.
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When I'm yelling at my phone because I wanted to answer the call but now I've opened some sort of an app that's telling me I didn't take enough steps today? Or when my kids get all upset and ask me why I sent them the sarcastic smiley face emoji when all I was trying to do was send a smiley face because forfuckssake how can you tell the difference between smiley face emojis they all look the same!? Those are the times I feel Joyce in my soul. Question: Am I the only person left who doesn't want to Facetime? Why do you need to see me while we're talking? Now I feel like I have to get dressed for a phone call. It's very stressful!!!
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In The Man Who Died Twice you really get to know the characters that you enjoyed in the The Thursday Murder Club. I honestly thought I couldn't like them any more than I did, but then Osman decided to prove me wrong.
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Elizabeth is everything I ever wanted to be when I grew up and kinda still is. She's a badass old lady and the smartest person reading the room at any given time. I love that she learned to lean on her friends a little this time around. And her Stephen! God, I love him and I can see why Elizabeth loves him, too. Ibrahim, my heart just broke for him in this book. He's so intelligent and so fragile, and what happened to him was so unfair. But he's got his friends and I have no doubt that Joyce will have him up and around in no time. Ron! Ron is cranky and hilarious and I would 100% like to go have a beer or 3 with him. Because while I may want to be Elizabeth, Ron is more or less what I have flowing through my DNA. Bogdan (whose name I heard as BobDan for the entirety of the 1st book), Donna, Chris, Patrice, and everyone else that they add to their little murder club as the books go by are all so real to me.
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The very short non-spoilery gist is that Elizabeth's slimy secret agent ex-husband shows up and wants her help. Someone is trying to kill him and she's one of the only people he trusts to keep him alive. Shit goes sideways. As it often does with this group of seventy-somethings. Of course, they manage to put it right eventually. And of course, they do in a way that leaves you smiling.
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If you liked the first book you will love this one. Highly Recommended....more
These characters are my life goals. Solving murder mysteries while drinking with my friends? Yes, that is how I imagine getting old. Older. And If I'm nThese characters are my life goals. Solving murder mysteries while drinking with my friends? Yes, that is how I imagine getting old. Older. And If I'm not up to the same ridiculous hijinks that I am now, I'll definitely be disappointed in myself.
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I love that this is a book about 70somethings. I mean, it's great to read about young adults. They're fun and adorable and we've all been there, right? But I'm never going to be young again. I will, however, be 75. Or so I hope! So, reading a book about a bunch of cool retirees is the same to me now as reading a book about a cool 25 year old when I was a teen.
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And even if I hadn't fallen in love with the characters so hard, this still would be one of the best, twistiest murder mysteries I've read in a long time. Thing is, it's just so well done from start to finish that I don't have any complaints. I can't really talk about the plot at all because I'm afraid that I'll let something slip, but this is one that I think you're better off going into with no expectations anyway. However, it would not be an exaggeration to say this is now one of my favorite books.
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Fair warning, I love cozy mysteries. But if those kinds of books aren't your jam, your mileage may vary with one. Highly recommended for fans of the genre.
2024 Reread to make sure I wasn't building this book up in my head, but I loved it just as much, possibly more, than I did the first time. This is definitely one of my favorite series. Lovelovelove these characters....more
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