DeAndre Jordan Tries to Keep Up with a Professional Chef

That's it.

That's the dish.

I mean.

Woo!

[laughs]

That looks pretty damn good to me.

Hey guys, it's Carla.

I'm here in the Bon Appetit test kitchen today

with Deandre Jordan.

The tallest and also most handsome player

on the Brooklyn Nets.

He is also our tallest guest to date.

Making me feel extra special.

So today, Deandre and I are going

to make vegan chocolate banana pancakes

and a delicious bloody Mary and we're going

to see how well Deandre follows along

with me through verbal instructions only.

I heard that you're vegan, obviously.

But I also heard that you don't do a lot of cooking at home.

I do a lot of eating.

Okay.

I do a lot of eating.

Not a lot of cooking.

They don't let me in the cooking area.

Great, and so how many times would you say you have cooked

at home?

Three times.

Three times, okay.

So today we are going to cook here.

It's going to be awesome.

So on the count of three we're just going to turn around

and start cooking.

Oh, now?

Yeah [laughs].

Okay.

One, two, three.

Okay.

I can't turn around at all now?

No, we can't look at each other any more.

Okay, good luck.

But I can feel your presence.

You know what I mean?

Yeah, it's just the nervous heat coming from my body.

It's going to be great, all right.

First thing, I know it sounds a little weird,

but we're going to use the liquid from this can

of chick peas to make kind of like a whipped cream.

So I want you to just shake up the can

of chick peas really well.

Shaky, shaky.

And then so there's a little strainer set

over the measuring cup.

Just pour the beans and the liquid through the strainer

so that we don't really need the beans.

We can use them for something else.

Chick pea pancakes perhaps.

What we're after is four ounces

of this delicious bean liquid.

I want to use four ounces.

So I'm going to pour all but a quarter cup in.

In what?

Oh sorry, into the, see the stand mixer?

Left of on the other side of the cooking pan.

There's a metal bowl set in the stand mixer thing.

Oh, with the banana in it?

Nope, other side.

With the flour stuff?

[Carla] Nope, keep going.

So there's a skillet.

Oh, this, this, this.

Yeah, that thing that's got a whisk attachment.

And then just go ahead and pour in maybe all

but a quarter cup of liquid.

[sighs] All right.

Into the metal bowl.

And if it's a little more or a little less,

it's not a big deal.

No, no we've got to be precise.

[laughs] Okay.

That's very delicate pouring.

I think that's pretty good right there.

Okay, so go back to your tray and there's a bowl of sugar.

Dump that into the liquid in the bowl.

And then there's a little tiny bowl with cream of tartar

in it and then that can go in the bowl, too.

[metal clanging]

I just want to.

Hold on, wait.

[metal clanging]

[laughs] Perfect so far exactly matched.

Okay, and then just tilt the head of the mixer down.

And there's a little switch on the side

that kind of locks the bowl.

It has a little icon of like the bowl tilted, yep.

Okay, okay.

So just flip that forward so it's locked.

Yep.

And then on the other side, let's go up to six.

Six?

Oh, that's my number so we're good.

Oh really?

Yeah. Is that true?

That's very true. I mean I knew that.

That's a fact.

I totally knew that.

Okay, so Deandre what's happening in this mixer,

it's called aquafaba.

That's the liquid from the bean.

Aquafaba?

Aquafaba.

Okay.

Have you never had this before?

No.

It's kind of cool.

It like kind of mimics egg whites.

Oh, okay.

But it also can sort of feel like whipped cream.

So we're going to kind of use it like as this leavener.

And it's going to be sweet, too, that's good.

And it's going to be a little sweet like a meringue.

So while that's happening, grab the bowl with the banana

and the fork.

You said grab the knife?

No [laughs].

The bowl with the banana and the fork.

And then we're just going to peel the banana

and smash the flesh in this bowl.

You can put your peel on the tray with the measuring cups.

And then just use your fork.

And we want this like really well mashed.

This is sort of taking the place of a little bit

of what the eggs do as a binder.

Vegan cooking is challenging, but it's cool

because then you figure out

what other ingredients you can use.

Yeah, it's cool.

I like that you have to find other things.

And I was kind of amazed at how this recipe comes together

because the bananas kind of act like glue,

but they're also a sweetener.

Right, it kind of looks like a thick cheese almost.

Yeah all right, cool.

So then you've got a little bottle of vanilla extract.

Tip in like a little splash of vanilla.

What's a splash, though?

Like a teaspoon.

And then there's a squeeze bottle that's got maple syrup

in it.

And I would do like I don't know two or three little

go around the bowl.

That doesn't make any sense.

I did three.

Perfect.

And that's our sweetener and we can adjust that to taste.

And then there's a can of walnut oil.

Are you good with nuts?

Yes.

Okay, great.

So then drizzle about the same amount

as whatever your vanilla amount was.

And that's going to add flavor but it's also good

to have fat in the batter.

And then mix that all together and then

there's a measuring cup with almond milk.

And just pour all of that in.

And you can just stir that together with the fork.

All the milk, right?

All the milk.

So now take that same bottle of vanilla

and do the same amount right into the aquafaba.

And that will kind of give it that nice whipped cream flavor

and then there's a bowl of salt.

Like a medium-sized bowl.

It should be right in front of your cutting board.

And just add a pinch of salt to the aquafaba, too.

Into the aquafaba?

Into the aquafaba.

The salt?

Yeah, a little bit.

Just a pinch.

All right, my pinch is different than your pinch.

[laughs] So do a small pinch.

Should I do like a pinky pinch

or like an index?

Yeah, a pinky pinch.

Pinky pinch, all right.

That's a good measurement.

I have pretty small hands.

I have to say.

[Deandre laughs]

Okay, so you can scoot your little banana mixture

over to the side of the cutting board

and grab the large bowl that has the flour in it.

This is whole wheat flour and then there's another flour

that's more like charcoal colored and that's buckwheat flour

and add the buckwheat flour to the bigger bowl

with the whole wheat flour.

That's the one that's next to the salt?

It's kind of grayish?

Correct.

Put that in the big bowl.

Exactly.

All of it?

All of it.

And then grab the cocoa powder which is in a smaller bowl

but it's pretty clear that it's cocoa powder.

Add that also to these other dry mixes.

All of it?

All of it.

And then you've got a jar of cinnamon.

A few dashes of cinnamon.

A few dashes?

A few dashes.

A pinch of salt to this, too.

Pinky?

Pinky pinch.

Pinky salt?

[laughs] You can do a little bit bigger than a pinky pinch

this time.

Okay, I'm going to go ring finger salt then.

Perfect.

And then there's another little bowl

that's got baking powder in it, so add that too.

And then just whisk this together

so it looks like all the flours are combined.

I like to hold my bowl sideways when I whisk.

Really?

Because my hands are big and it also makes me look

like I know what I'm doing, you know?

[laughs] Okay.

I'll do the same.

Because if you hold it down and kind of,

then people don't think you're advanced.

Yeah, I don't want people to think I need

this cutting board.

Okay, let's turn our faba off.

Grab a spoon from one of those little bins

and we're just going to take a look at this.

So you should be able to scoop it out

and turn your spoon over and nothing should fall

off the spoon.

Oh, hoo hoo!

And the peaks, you know like at Dairy Queen

like the tip that peaks over?

Yeah it looks like, yeah.

Does it look like that where it's like kind

of going straight up and maybe a tiny bit curved at the top?

To the curve, yeah it looks like almost

like a person's hairstyle kind of.

Oh okay, and then give it a taste because I'm curious

what you think.

It's pretty good.

It's not too beany right?

No, no.

It's pretty good.

I taste a lot of sugar and a little dash, a pinky of salt.

I know and that's what kind of like helps with

that beanish flavor.

All right, take the whisk out of the dry ingredients

because we're going to pour in that banana,

almond milk mixture.

And you can just pour it in kind of all at once.

But then we're going to use the whisk

to mix the batter together.

The whole banana stuff.

The whole banana thing.

It's a banana situation.

And then just use your whisk to mix this.

I don't know if I can do this one sideways just yet.

What do you mean, holding the bowl?

Yeah, it's supposed to get clumpy like this right?

At beginning it's going to feel like pretty clumpy,

but it should smooth out and be almost the texture

of like a pretty thick chocolate pudding.

Yeah, okay I'm starting to get that.

And then when you don't see anymore floury bits,

just smack your whisk against the side of the bowl

to get the batter off and we're actually going

to add some of the aquafaba to this.

Oh, it smells good.

Is it good chef etiquette to like smell it?

Sure, yes, definitely.

Okay, because it smells really good.

It smells very chocolatey.

That's the cocoa.

Yeah, so if you just smack off the extra batter

and then using the one cup measure that's

on that silver tray.

A cup you said?

Yeah one cup.

It can be a little bit heaping.

So you can just use the cup as a scooper.

It's aesthetically very pleasing, the aquafaba.

Yeah, I think we did a good job.

It's shiny.

I mean, I can't see yours but I think mine

looks pretty good.

[laughs] I think yours is perfect.

I put this in the chocolate?

Yeah, so put this in.

Tell me how you're getting the aquafaba out of your cup?

[laughs]

Um, with gentle force.

Okay, so then grab one of those spatulas.

The rubber spatula, and then I want you

to kind of gently fold the aquafaba into the batter.

So what you're going to do is kind of scraping down

to the bottom of the bowl.

Is it cool if I use the small black one?

Yeah, that's the one I'm using.

I want you to think of your spatula

as sort of cutting straight through to the bottom

of the bowl and then folding up and over

to fold the aquafaba in.

Going like under, but scooping it over again.

Until it's pretty much combined.

A couple of white streaks left is okay,

but I don't want like big chunks of aquafaba.

And this is just going to lighten the batter.

The raw cocoa tastes...

Did you just taste yours?

I did because there was some on my thumb.

Can I accidentally put some on my thumb?

Yeah [laughs].

The raw cocoa is pretty bitter.

Yeah.

But very chocolatey.

All right, we're ready to make pancakes.

You've got a big jar of coconut oil.

I bet you're using a lot of coconut oil in your cooking.

Yes.

And avacado.

Take a big spoonful.

You could use a teaspoon, but like a pretty big spoonful.

Ooh, I dropped some in my batter.

And we can add more, I just want enough coconut oil

in the pan to where the whole surface is covered.

Okay, coconut oil in the pan.

Scoop up like a quarter cup of batter and then we're going

for five pancakes and we're going to go like

around the perimeter of the pan like numbers on a clock.

But go ahead and scoop that first quarter cup of batter

into the pan at like, you know, the 12 o'clock spot,

the three o'clock spot, it doesn't matter.

Did your first batter go in?

Uh, no we're still working.

Oh, okay, are we scooping?

Nope, we got it.

What's happening?

The first one's a little...

I made a Mickey Mouse pancake.

That's fine.

You can use that same black spatula that we did our folding.

So if you scoop with the quarter cup,

then you can use the spatula to scoop it

into your coconut oil.

Pour it right onto itself.

And it will put itself into a circle.

Oh my God, this was way easier than the first time.

[laughs] I'm excited to see the Mickey Mouse one.

I'm on pancake four, but I could slow down.

Where are you at?

You're bragging.

[laughs] Okay.

First of all.

I'm on pancake four now.

Great lock step.

So everybody's in?

Everybody's in.

I'm just doing some cosmetic work.

Okay [laughs] cool.

And then while they're cooking, we're going

to just slice up some banana for our topping.

There's a banana on a plate over here by your cutting board.

We've got to peel this guy and then

while the vegan banana pancakes are cooking,

we're just going to slice this.

I sliced part of my banana already.

Fabulous, oh you did?

On accident.

What I want you to do is kind of slice it on an angle

so that we get like long, oval slices of banana.

So I get to use the knife now?

Yeah.

All right.

So you mentioned hosting the holidays.

Yes.

I feel like this is a really good

holiday brunch situation.

This is good.

I think people would be very impressed with you

if you busted out the vegan banana chocolate pancakes.

I know but then I have to say it like oh,

I can make you guys some.

[laughs] Yeah, make it sound super casual.

I'm just going to go in the kitchen

and grab a little breakfast, anybody.

Then I would have to FaceTime you and be like

hey we need to do this again.

All right, so nice slices of banana

and then just set that aside again.

Now describe what's happening on the surface

of these pancakes.

Kind of like lava-y, kind of cake like the cake

that Mrs. Trunchbull made the kid eat.

Perfect.

Are there any bubbles breaking the surface?

Yeah.

Okay good.

Starting with pancake number one, we're just going

to turn them over and you.

Were you worried about this?

I am.

The thing is, you want to pick the pancake all the way up.

I feel like what people do a lot, they pick a pancake up

from one side and they try to flip it over its side,

but then it just lands on the pancake next to it.

So pick the pancake all the way up and then

in the space where the pancake used to be,

just put it back down.

Turn it over.

Got it.

Woo!

Right?

Easy peasy.

I find that the squat technique is good

for flipping the pancakes.

What is the squat technique?

You personally have to squat?

Kind of like sumo wrestler position.

Yeah because you're like, you're very far away

from the pan.

Everybody's over.

I think they just need a minute on this side.

Then we're going to put them on the plate.

Then we're going to make a very delicious bloody Mary

and then brunch is served.

Okay, pancakes coming out.

Okay, so I put my plate.

Yep, plate's on the board.

Same thing with the pancakes.

What I want you to do is I want you to go around

just like they were going around the perimeter,

but I just want you to put the edge of pancake number two

on the edge of pancake number one instead

of having them flat or in a stack, I want them

to go around the edge like slightly overlapping each other.

Pancakes are on the plate.

Pancakes have to hang for a second because we want the drink

to be ready and the pancakes to be served at the same time.

Okay.

Okay, so before we finish pancakes,

we're going to make a delicious bloody Mary.

Okay, so you want the measuring cup with the tomato.

You want the whole tray with all the fixings.

Got it.

Okay do you like spicy, sour?

Extra spicy.

All of the stuff.

Okay so let's start with the Sriracha.

I would add about a teaspoon to start.

We can add more.

But you can also just squeeze this straight in.

Just throw caution to the wind.

You know what I mean?

All right.

If you like it spicy.

Okay and then we got vegan Worcestershire sauce,

which I didn't even know existed.

Me neither, that's great.

Right, so this does come out of the bottle pretty fast

so I'd pour that into the teaspoon.

And I don't know, like a half a spoon?

You can always add more.

And then take your pickle brine

and we actually want the brine.

So you can dip the tablespoon measure right

into the pickle liquid.

I would do a whole tablespoon of this.

Bloody Marys, ooh I was about to do a second tablespoon.

Let's do a second tablespoon.

Let's do it.

Let's do it.

I was just thinking about how they like

make your palate salivate.

I love that.

I'm salivating just.

Just looking at it.

And then you might have another little spoon

in one of those little jars.

Horseradish which is sour but also pretty spicy.

So I'm going to do another spoonful of that.

Yeah, I'm going to do a big spoon of that.

Big spoon?

Okay, I'm down.

[Deandre grunts]

Horseradish is underrated.

Some black pep.

I love black pepper, so I did like three big cracks.

You could also use cayenne.

That would be good.

Chili flake.

A couple dashes of curry powder if you're into that.

Wait I have cayenne?

Uh, no I was saying if we didn't have black pepper.

Oh, okay I thought you were trying to one up me on mine.

You said curry powder?

A little curry powder.

Okay then we've got celery seed.

You could use fennel seeds even would be good with this.

Yeah, like if you didn't have Worcestershire,

you could use soy sauce.

I just like a bloody Mary bar where you just

have all the stuff set out and you can add

whatever you want.

And then there's a lemon, too.

More sour and then so squeeze.

Just squeeze her in there?

Yeah, squeeze her in there.

And then I would add a good pinch of salt.

So like your ring finger pinch

which is probably my three-finger pinch.

It's like a meal.

You're getting your full serving of vitamins.

Very hearty.

Mmm, ooh pretty good.

You tasted it?

Uh-huh.

Give it a taste.

I think it could be more sour and more spicy personally.

What do you think?

I agree with everything you just said.

Great, I'm going Sriracha straight from the bottle.

Okay, I think I have arrived.

It feels like a proper bloody to me.

I think I'm cool.

Okay so now we're going to measure out

one and a half ounces of vodka.

So you've got to break your seal.

Are you clapping for the vodka?

Yeah.

[laughs] All right.

Taking off the foil.

All right, pop the cork.

[corks popping]

Perfect, one and a half ounces.

One and a half?

One and a half.

Booyah.

And that goes right into the measuring cup

with the tomato mixture.

Give that a little stir with whatever spoon you have left.

I'm down to the long one.

There's two glasses on the station.

There's a glass with a celery stick and a pickle

and then there's another nice highball glass.

So bring them both over to the cutting board

and I want you to fill the one that doesn't have anything

in it all the way to the top and a little bit

over the top with ice.

And then find some space and get your celery stick in there.

And now, the tomato mixture goes right into the glass.

So just pour this over the ice.

Oh man.

Right to the brim, now you can drop the lemon on the edge

and then there's pickled okra.

And just like drop that down the side.

I think that's perfect.

This screams brunch to me.

And this screams holiday.

Like it's literally in holiday colors.

Yeah this screams everything to me.

And if you have people coming over

or staying with you over the holidays

and you bust out the bloody Mary bar

the day after Thanksgiving, Christmas.

Yeah.

Mmm.

It's good stuff.

More presents.

Do we want olives in our bloody Mary?

Yeah, I do.

I'm afraid I'm going to overflow.

Okay, I got one.

Yes.

That means you have to just take a little sip.

[laughs] Might be.

Oh my God I want to drink it, but we have

to finish our banana pancakes.

Pancake plate.

Boom.

Back on the cutting board.

Booyah.

We're going back to aquafaba land.

I want you to do like a nice dollop of aquafaba

on top of every pancake.

And so just go around that nice little shingled situation

that you made.

I call this a topper whopper.

A topper whopper?

Yeah.

It's a topper whopper.

You've got all five pancakes topped?

You're taking great care and deliberation with this.

I like that.

It's just precise.

And now, you can just pick the banana slices up

with your fingers and tuck a banana

on top of each spoonful of aquafaba.

Yeah, the aquafaba's like so firm that it's like.

Oh yeah, holds it up.

Yeah, it's like a little banana cloud pillow.

And then there's some chopped walnuts.

Take a handful of those, sprinkle them all over everything,

but don't cover up your beautiful banana pillow.

And then squeeze bottle of maple syrup

and then just drizzle all maple syrup all around.

Drizzle drazzle everywhere.

That's it.

That's the dish.

Damn.

Woo!

That looks pretty damn good to me.

I think brunch is served.

Okay so now when you're ready, grab your pancake plate,

grab your bloody Mary, and then we're going

to count to three and then turn around.

[Deandre exhales audibly]

One, two, three.

Tada [gasps] gorgeous.

You went semicircle.

I did, yeah, a little crescent.

I'm into it. I like it.

Thank you, thank you so much.

This is nice. I like it.

It's your interpretation.

You have big dollops.

That's nice.

I do, I did big dollops, you know?

But my pancakes were a little bigger.

I went from like small to big.

Do you see how I did that?

[laughs] I like that.

That's awesome.

It's like ascending.

It's so good even the ground wants some.

Cheers. Cheers.

[glasses clinking]

Do we get to drink now?

All right, you want to eat?

I do want to eat.

Ready for brunch? I am ready.

I'm very ready.

Okay, let's do it.

Welcome to my holiday brunch.

Now we trade plates.

Oh we trade?

I get to?

Yeah.

I'm sampling your handy work.

I'm very jealous of you that you get to.

I am jealous of me.

And then the drink, too.

Oh, the drink too?

I put a little surprise on the side there.

Thank you I really, look at

that very classy olive garnishing.

So how do you feel now?

I feel like I like my plate.

But I feel like you made this for me.

I did.

It's more.

But you were worried about flipping pancakes

and you made like a full array.

Cheers to you, sir.

Cheers to you.

Thank you. Thank you.

Mmm.

Oh my God that's a real reset, you know?

Delish.

After all of that hard work we did, we deserve to.

We really do, I got super thirsty.

How is it?

Is it too spicy? Is it good?

Mm-mmm [negative].

Okay, good.

It's so good.

It should be spicy.

I love it spicy.

Pancakes.

I'm going to start with silver dollar over here.

Okay, go ahead.

Well you have to do the same. [laughs]

No, I know that yours is going to be good.

I'm not worried about it.

But no, we still have to sample.

Mmm.

Be honest with me.

This is really good.

Is it?

Mm-hmm [affirmative] good crunch.

That means you had a good amount of oil in the pan.

See it was that extra little oil that I put.

It sticks and burns.

And you knew it.

They do have a dessert vibe, but then they're also vegan.

So I feel very...

I feel very healthy.

We could eat a hundred of these and be fine.

Right this like sweet and spicy thing is kind of working.

It's good.

Man, you guys are jealous.

And no one would ever know

that we used bean liquid for that.

So holidays at your place?

As long as you're behind me.

Yeah, you could also get helpers and you could be me

and you could just tell them what to do.

And I could just sit down and not.

[Carla laughs]

Okay, yeah then holidays at my place, yeah.

You would be making the drinks.