At the risk of sounding like an infomercial, I have to ask: Has this ever happened to you? You’re home with your family, watching holiday movies, and at some point, you’ve simply had enough of women going back to their small towns and falling in love with some guy from high school who now works as a carpenter? You’d rather throw some queerness into the rotation but you don’t want to surprise grandma with any Blue Is the Warmest Color-style scissoring scenes. Fortunately, there’s a solution — and it involves staying merrily within the holiday genre.
Holiday movies — which are almost exclusively about Christmas, unfortunately — tend to be very formulaic and wholesome, which makes them likable across a wide swath of audiences, including older generations. While there is plenty to critique about these films, the point is to check your critical brain at the door and just enjoy the vibes. They’ve got predictable low-stakes storylines, sparkly sets, cheery music, and a nebulous “spirit of the season” that invokes a certain sense of kindness and childlike joy.
You won’t find anything subversive or even very queer (in the political sense of the word) here, but if you find yourself among multigenerational family this season, and you want some films with LGBTQ+ characters that are still pleasing to the masses, here’s a list for you to consult on those dark snowy nights.
This is Lifetime’s first lesbian holiday romcom, and to be honest, it delivers. Starring Elise Bauman (Carmilla) as a Chrisitmas-obsessed young woman named Alma who runs two (!) businesses in a small Maine town, Under the Christmas Tree follows her chance run-in with Charlie (Tattiawna Jones), the state arborist tasked with finding the perfect Christmas tree for the capitol building. (It should be noted that this is a task Charlie treats with the utmost seriousness, as if the governor’s reelection depends on it.) When the perfect tree ends up being on Alma’s family land, Charlie stays in town eating pastries at Ricki Lake’s patisserie and crashing a gingerbread house-making contest while the two navigate their attraction to each other and their seemingly conflicting goals.
Author’s note: Augusta, the capital of Maine, is a 52 minute drive from the town of Camden; it is truly not necessary for Charlie to post up there. But that’s what we love about these movies: no thoughts, all vibes.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? No! Everybody wants these two women to get together, including Alma’s parents; and there’s not a line of anti-gay dialogue in sight.
This cute little Canadian romp from last year follows Peter (Michael Urie), a kind of uptight social media manager who thinks he’s in a stellar relationship with a perfect guy (spoiler alert: he’s not!) until he finds out said guy is married. Devastated not only by this betrayal but also because he once again won’t have a boyfriend to bring home to parade in front of his family for Christmas, he convinces his best friend Nick (Philemon Chambers) to come with him and be his pretend boyfriend. Nick reluctantly agrees, but they don’t even get the chance to lie because Peter’s mom has already set Peter up on a date with her spin instructor, James (Luke Macfarlane — who, side note, also starred in the incredibly underrated sci-fi show Killjoys, which is also quite queer). This is a very fluffy family-friendly gay Christmas romcom with a not-quite-love-triangle and minimal drama.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? No!
I know this one is controversial; hear me out. This movie is objectively problematic and, plot-wise, not very good. But that’s par for the course in holiday movies. If for some reason you haven’t heard of Happiest Season, which was marketed as the first mainstream lesbian Christmas rom-com, it follows Abby, played by none other than lesbian icon Kristen Stewart. And Kristen Stewart is very gay and very hot in this movie. That’s just a fact. The rest of the cast includes a lot of big names too, including ones grandma might know like Mary Steenburgen and Victor Garber, in addition to Alison Brie, Dan Levy, and the ever luminous Aubrey Plaza.
The story is about Abby going home with her girlfriend Harper (Mackenzie Davis) to her wealthy politician-led family for Christmas, but oops, even though they’re living together, Harper has not come out to her family and needs Abby to pretend they’re just friends. This alone borders on being too annoying of a plotline for many queer viewers, but it gets tipped over the edge by how terrible Harper reveals herself to be. That said, this movie is full of funny lines and physical comedy, it has a well-written speech from Dan Levy’s character about people coming out on their own timeline, and Kristen Stewart and Aubrey Plaza have some great scenes together (though not enough; you’ve heard the discourse). This definitely fits the bill for the family dramedy ensemble holiday movie.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? Sadly, yes, a great deal. But if you can get past that, it’s still enjoyable and still accessible for grandma.
This cute ensemble movie follows a cast of mostly teen characters in an Illinois town on Christmas Eve. The largely cliché and wholesome shenanigans involve a heartthrob pop star, a success-driven girl, some cheerleaders, a girl in mild Gay Panic mode, a Waffle House-eque diner called Waffle Town, and Joan Cusack as a town eccentric in a foil-covered truck. There’s a whole lot of hetero in this movie but the queerness is still present, and though it’s mostly about The Youths, it goes down easy for just about anyone.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? Mildly, but anti-gay sentiment is absent.
This is the latest from writer, director, and producer Christin Baker of Tello Films, who specializes in streaming content for lesbians and other queer women. Baker has produced three lesbian/queer Christmas rom-coms before (Christmas at the Ranch, I Hate New Years, and Season of Love), all of which also fit the bill of mostly-wholesome holiday romance.
In Merry & Gay, Broadway star Becca (Dia Frampton) returns to her rural hometown for the month of December to decompress from the fast-paced New York City life — and to reconnect with her high school love, Sam (a nonbinary character played by nonbinary actor Andi René Christensen). Sam isn’t exactly receptive at first, because they don’t know how to deal with the reappearance of a person they are still obviously in love with, but as the two work together on the town’s Christmas variety show (and their moms work very hard to sneakily try to get them back together), their relationship deepens. This one has the bonus of a fairly diverse cast including several gender nonconforming or trans side characters and a deaf character.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? Not even a little! And no one struggles with pronouns! A great example for grandmas who may benefit from seeing older folks seamlessly incorporate they/them pronouns into their lexicon.
Here’s one for the old-school Hallmark fans, but with enough interesting characters keep it from being completely snooze-worthy. (Sorry, Hallmark.) The queer storyline in this movie is a subplot, but it’s actually pretty good. The movie follows Emily (Bethany Joy Lenz), a marketing whiz who is on the rise in her job, and whose boyfriend Jamie (Tyler Hynes) dumps her months before Christmas. But surprise! He didn’t tell his family, and now he needs Emily to come to Christmas and pretend they’re still dating. She has a reason to agree to do this, but the part that’s relevant for our purposes is Jamie’s sister Becca (Alison Wandzura), a cool divorced single mom lesbian who knows her own power and is also very funny.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? Nope!
This brand-new tearjerker follows a long-term relationship from beginning to end between Kit (Ben Aldridge) and Michael (Jim Parsons), showing their awkward first hookups, their rocky middle period, and, eventually, Kit’s diagnosis with a terminal illness. Sally Field plays Kit’s mom, and if you’ve seen Steel Magnolias, you know that woman will make you cry. Plus, everyone loves Sally Field. It’s a win-win, unless you don’t want to watch something extremely sad, in which case skip this one.
Is coming out a part of the storyline? Yes, but only a small part.
Honorable Mentions:
Dolly Parton isn’t gay (that we know of), but she is a gay icon, and she has a Christmas special and she’s delightful, and literally everyone likes her. A great choice for any family holiday!
This one gets an honorable mention because it’s a period piece (taking place in the 1950s); it’s kind of the OG lesbian Christmas movie and it’s a prestige film that got Oscar nods, so it straddles a couple of worlds; and, like Dolly, everyone loves Cate Blanchett.
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