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Newborn and dummy

20 replies

Catarinah · 27/01/2020 13:14

To cut a long story short, our 3 week old won't settle at all to sleep at night unless I hold him (tried EVERYTHING... resorted to co sleeping but even this isn't really working). I am breastfeeding, and even with latching in properly (had this checked) my nipples are sore purely because he constantly wants to be on my boob (for comfort I'm assuming, he was 3 weeks early and weighed 5lb5oz, now over 6lb).
So I am considering giving him a dummy to help settle him at night time because I can't continue with putting him on my breast every hour because my nipples are sore (his mouth is tiny and I have large breasts) but I am very reluctant to give him a dummy because I don't want to to become reliant on one and only settle if he has a dummy). Any other advice or things I could try? I have tried all the usual stuff E. G swaddle, white noise, walking around, dancing, singing, cuddling, my t shirt on his crib bla bla but nothing settles him unless he's sucking on me). Thanks

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Haz1516 · 27/01/2020 13:18

Give him a dummy. You can always gradually take it away after the 12 week mark when he's more settled generally.

Ibizababyy · 27/01/2020 13:37

I could have written your post 4 years ago when I had my little boy- 3 weeks early too! I was so stressed about the thought of a dummy and held off as long as possible due to this. Turns out giving him one was the best thing I ever did! He was still pretty rubbish at sleeping but at least wasn’t constantly attached to me which was making my supply go through the roof and then drowning him resulting in even more bf difficulties! In the end he had a dummy for naps and night time only and never became one of those kids that has it permanently in his mouth as I’d feared. I’m expecting number 2 soon and won’t hesitate to give a dummy if needed.

LoisLittsLover · 27/01/2020 13:40

SIDS advice now is to keep dummy for 6 months once introduced for sleep times

Bert2020 · 27/01/2020 13:42

I would go with a dummy. Our lactation consultant at 6 weeks actually suggested it as beforehand we were permanently attached. DD had it for naps & bedtimes until 18 months when she simply refused it.

Lou2120 · 27/01/2020 13:48

I would give the dummy but you may still have to feed ever hour as his very small still. Both my breastfed babies had to be woken to feed as they were small. Maybe double check with your health visitor

BitConfused28 · 27/01/2020 13:50

You've tried a lot then by the sounds of it, id go with the dummy,

My DD had her dummy till 8 months when she popped it with her teeth, itbwas her favourite out of several and once it was ruined she refused any other. She was fine about it after a few days

So when DS came along i took his at 8 months and he was fine about it going aswell

If you do get a dummy be prepared for how small they make your tiny baby look

DS was 4lb 14oz and his dummy seemed almost as big as his head - pic for proof

Also dummys are meant to minimize the risk of SIDS which is another bonus of them

Newborn and dummy

Pinkflipflop85 · 27/01/2020 13:55

At 3 weeks, hourly wake ups are quite normal as baby needs to keep building supply. It won't be this way forever!

HavelockVetinari · 27/01/2020 13:58

@BitConfused28 awwww! How gorgeous! 😍😍

debbs77 · 27/01/2020 14:00

All of my children had a dummy from birth. They were finished with them by the age of two.

It is a natural instinct for a baby to sickle, so definitely try it!!!

Mysocalledlifex · 27/01/2020 14:49

Im also breast feeding my baby is always feeding just normal for breast fed babies my baby has a dummy just use it for sleep times.
Also dummy's reduce the risk of sids so they are a good thing.
all mine have had one from birth diddnt do them any harm.

Mysocalledlifex · 27/01/2020 14:50

I found the mam dummy's are the best smaller & flat so fit a newborn better.

ChocolateRaisin · 27/01/2020 14:55

My biggest regret with DD was that I didn’t give her a dummy early enough, so she wouldn’t accept one. I was then used for non stop comfort until she was 16 months which I found very claustrophobic. I’m due in a few weeks with new baby, the dummies are sitting here waiting for him

rosieposies · 27/01/2020 14:56

We use MAM dummy's and have done since DD was 3 weeks old - they've literally saved my life a million times, and I think the shape helps avoid nipple confusion x

HeavyLoad · 27/01/2020 14:59

I was in the same position as you with DD1, I was very anti-dummy for no good reason. I eventually gave her one at 8 weeks and it was a life saver. Also looking back I realised I was to quick to put her on the breast whenever she cried and didn't try to settle her in other ways first.

123launcher · 27/01/2020 15:02

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Napqueen1234 · 27/01/2020 15:05

Try a dummy- no harm! I fail to believe a hungry baby would be tricked by a dummy and not feed when needed (providing they are healthy, not jaundiced etc and waking and crying for feeds regularly). I was v nervous about ruining breastfeeding but as a second time mum felt my DC needed the comfort sucking but didn’t want the boob (would latch to suck but cough and splitter and spit out the milk so clearly wasn’t hungry). A dummy made life a lot easier!

Shmithecat2 · 27/01/2020 15:08

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Mrsmummy90 · 27/01/2020 15:40

Sending you hugs! The first few weeks are the hardest. Yes to a dummy!

Use lansinoh nipple cream constantly and that should help with the pain. It's amazing xx

redwoodmazza · 27/01/2020 16:17

Don't forget that whatever you do to try and settle your LO at night, you are 'conditioning' him to what he will expect! Therefore make it as easy for yourself as you can.

I tried to tire my son out before his last feed - by letting him lie naked on a changing mat on the floor and kick his legs around [not easy for them to do that with nappies and clothing on so it's a bit of a novelty for them!] and then also let him kick in his bath. Then I fed him and as he got drowsy, I would plonk him in his Moses basket/cot in a darkened room. I would pull the door to behind me, so he didn't have much light and would then associate the dark with sleeping.

Worked for me.
Good luck!

rainbowrainbows · 27/01/2020 16:24

Dummies are amazing! Go for it. You’re making life unnecessarily difficult for yourself if you don’t at least try.

My DD (breastfed) didn’t take her dummy until 8/9 months! But when she did it was a godsend (high needs baby). Looking back, I wish I’d persevered with her taking it a lot sooner.

I took it off her at 16 months when she started to bite through them. 2 nights of disturbed sleep then all fine.

Don’t understand the guilt around dummies! Babies know when they are hungry and if they don’t want it they will let you know. Babies are smarter than we give them credit for.

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