Hi I am looking for advice from other people who have experienced similar births please. sorry it's a long post!
I am 31 and 7.5 weeks postpartum with my first child. It was a 44 hour labour, my waters went naturally I was induced as I did not progress past 2cm dilated. My little girl got distressed, she was back to back with her hand up and I could not deliver her so she was delivered with forceps. I sustained a 2nd degree tear internally and an episiotomy. My stitches ruptured but my episiotomy has since granulated. I had an infection in the internal tear as well as the episiotomy which cleared about two weeks ago. I had some incontinence during my week in hospital- bladder and bowel-and then my bladder was found to be retaining which meant I had a catheter for two weeks.
I have had two episodes of incontinence in the last fortnight, urinary, also if I need to poo I have to get to the toilet urgently.
My husband and I had sex for the first time since birth a few days ago. It was absolutely mortifying for me. Sorry for TMI... I was very tight before giving birth and could clench my husband extremely hard. However now my vaginal walls feel very weak and I am struggling to feel much at all when I when I do my kegels or during sex. There was little sensation for me during sex which was so distressing for me. My husband came but it took him longer, he swears I feel almost the same as before and that it was because I put a lot of lube inside that it took him longer to come.
I have an appointment with a women's health physio next week. I am doing my kegels religiously, even though I can't feel much, this seems to be helping keep control of my bladder but I am so worried about recovery. I know it's early days but we had a fantastic sex life before and I am so scared it's over.
Please can you share your experiences and advice.
To ask about your pelvic floor postpartum?
filou87 · 01/03/2018 19:01
Pelvic exercises are definitely the way to go.
I'm with @Eatalot about getting a machine, it really helps make sure you target the right muscles.
I went with this one from John Lewis. It is freaking expensive but it does seem to work. I've been lazy with it lately, but I'm 12 months postpartum so feeling pretty much like normal now. I used it in the run up to labour and afterwards (there was a period of time they said to not use it, can't remember how long that was) and the difference pre and post was a little 
m.johnlewis.com/elvie-pelvic-floor-tracker/p2795193?zoneId=1
I think the lack of support women get postpartum for incontinence etc is shocking
I had an episiotomy and Forceps delivery for ds1. Pelvic floor definitely took a while to get back to normal - don’t panic- 7 weeks is nothing!
Exercises are the way to go definitely.
I was ok after a few months- however when I got pregnant with ds2 it went to pot- when I had morning sickness and was vomiting I would wet myself. 
Not ideal. I only had 16.5 months between births though so I’m guessing that didn’t help!
I went to the gp and got referred for physio.
It’s so common- but people don’t talk about it.
Thank you for all the suggestions and advice so far, I really appreciate it.
Sorry to others who've been through a hard time too 
My birth experience was different but resulted in a 3C tear. I had sex for the first time at around 8 weeks postpartum and couldn't really feel anything, although DP maintains I feel the same. I'm now six months postpartum and still receiving physio for my pelvic floor. I couldn't really feel my muscles working when I did the exercises but my physio has said there's a definite improvement so do keep doing what you're doing, I promise it works!
I've also since bought a Kegel 8 machine and I personally believe I can feel much more difference now when I clench and I can do the exercises without the machine and think "yeah that's working". They're a lot of money so I would wait until after your physio appointment - see what they say and then decide if you want the machine or are happy to keep going with your exercises 
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