And Sometimes, We Fail

It happens. It’s not an easy thing to handle when it comes our way, but it’s inevitable that sometimes we will come face-to-face with the one thing we want to run far away from.

Failure. 

I’ve written twice now on the importance of goal setting - of aiming high, coming up with a plan and finding those accountability partners to help you along the way. But a truly good goal is one that has the real potential for failure. If we don’t face that fear, we aren’t challenging ourselves enough. 

I don’t want to pretend this is easy though.  There will be times we miss the mark, and we will shake our heads in frustration and wonder, ‘Maybe this isn’t the right path for me after all.’

It was 14 years ago when I had my first significant career failure. There was a leadership opportunity at State Farm to be a Test Manager. I had experience that was suited to a different role (that of a Project Manager) but being a Test Manager appealed to me more. I dug in deep: studied the background and job expectations, did mock interviews with my mentors (who encouraged me to seek this new role), and wrote down how much this next step would mean to my overall goal planning. 

I was ready. I had all the pieces I needed for success, right?

Well, we already know how this story ends. I didn’t get the position. I sought feedback, and found out that while the interview committee felt I had leadership potential, they weren’t as confident in my experience. And this started my own line of questioning. 

-Was I going for the wrong role?

-Was I aiming too high?

-How can I face my mentors, now that they’ve seen me fail?

For some of us, that acute failure is needed to examine what we want and what we’re doing. We need to check to see if we’re driving down the right road. We should ask for feedback, connect with our mentors, and express disappointment in our setbacks, without wallowing too much in our grief. 

Two months later another opportunity arose, and I was ready. My mentors and I had debriefed.  I’d come even more prepared; my experience was more tailored for this. 

And I got the role. My own journey into State Farm leadership had begun. 

I don’t want to dismiss the emotions around failure - it can sting. We are social creatures attuned to the feelings and perceptions of others. But for any long career that involves ambitious goal-setting, failure will be part of the process. How we regroup and move on from failure is what sets us apart - and allows us to be receptive to the next opportunity that comes along. 

As I wrote in my first article, this series around goal-setting has been a risk I’ve taken, and I’ve been motivated by the feedback. I appreciate all the comments and engagements around these articles, and am considering another series for 2022. I would welcome ideas from you about what workplace topics you want to hear about. 

As always, thank you for reading. And as you move forward setting your goals, finding your accountability partners, I encourage you to become just a little less afraid of failing. It’s a part of the long journey we are on - so keep on moving forward.