A Season of Gratitude...

At this time of year, with Thanksgiving here and Christmas right behind, I reflect, take stock and muse about the coming year. My goodness, as I did a month by month assessment, and I know this holds true for so many, what a year... Honestly, I’m shocked I had the strength to hold up. But I did. Yes, it was a year of many tough challenges. More importantly, though, it was an extraordinary time of personal growth and the most positive self-realizations. Interesting struggles became touch-stone learning points. Nothing I was handed was too much, physically, mentally or emotionally. Though a surprise in number, events were doled out in a somewhat manageable way. Did I feel pushed to the limit? Absolutely. Did the year break me? No, I feel more resilient, more capable. I would like to think I’m a better man after moving through a year of trials and tribulations. In retrospect, it was just hard enough, just painful enough for me to sit up and take notice. That was especially important as I continued on my own journey of embracing and celebrating change. Standing steadfast, honoring and respecting my moral compass and unwavering in my conviction, I was led down a path of patience and resolve I didn’t know I had. This doesn’t mean I stopped questioning why. Oh, I continue to question. The difference is, for the first time ever, I’m at an incredible peace for all those unanswerable things. That alone is restful and has paved the way for me to work at being kinder, gentler, more compassionate.

Without getting into gritty details, it has been a year of unusual health issues. I’ve experienced everything from pneumonia and influenza “A” to a fractured spine, pulmonary emboli and now pleurisy, and everything in between, but no COVID 19, thankfully. 8 negative tests and no anti-bodies. It’s all good. I will heal from my current ailments. Nothing is chronic. What an incredible blessing to have never been sick before. It’s kind of nice to have it visit you all at once, just bring it on and get over it.  The song “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” holds a special place in my heart now. Both my parents had health issues, this year, too. It brought us even closer together as we navigated uncharted waters of strokes, hip replacements and literal and figurative next steps. Talk about an education, and the pure and simple joy of being in their company - what a gift and such a luxury. 

Then there was a whole host of oddball occurrences, including the loss of a massive, iconic oak tree in our backyard wiping out 14 years of landscaping, a dozen other trees and my outdoor office, in a blink of an eye. No one was hurt, it fell, without warning, at nighttime. And it opened up a previous shade garden to all sorts of new bright, sunny possibilities. We did lose our two beloved dachshunds, one to a bear attack in front of me in my own back yard, the other died shortly thereafter of a broken heart. Talk about traumatic. But then we were gifted with the most amazing, loving brother/sister dachshund puppy mix. They have filled our home with love, energy and curiosity at a time it was needed most.

I don’t mean to bring out a laundry list of negative things. A lot has happened and I’m sharing just some of the highlights. It’s not “woe is me”. It’s the opposite. I know what pulled me through. My faith expanded and grew. Those near and dear to me, my spouse, family, close friends, all rallied and encouraged. I feel a stronger bond. I came to depend on others, a trait I sorely lacked. I learned the healthy benefits of accepting change and the knowledge that, yes, you can teach an old dog new tricks. I’m living proof. I have a renewed spirit and love of life. I take nothing for granted. I truly enjoy each moment. I’m living a quieter life that somehow seems more full and rich. I’ve always appreciated simple pleasures, but now I absolutely embrace them. Would you see anything different in me? I think not. There’s been an internal change and I feel it and relish it. It’s a lovely, healthy driving force. The realization complacency has no place in my life is an eye opener. The gifts I have received this year have been unusually bountiful, far too many to mention in this missive. I am so pleased and so appreciative I was in a position to gracefully and gratefully accept what came my way and use each occurrence as a tool to carefully analyze and help me continue to grow toward a more full potential. Truly, a work in progress, for sure. In this moment, I’m a new and better version, Mark Collins 6.1...

As we move toward the end of one year and head into another, I can’t help but consider just how blessed I am, in every aspect of my life. I feel reinforced by positive, life-affirming thoughts and actions that surround me. This year taught me anything can happen and will. It’s what you do, as an individual, with that newfound experience, those lessons learned, that count. Every fiber of my being feels encouraged, loved and necessary. I believe I can accomplish anything I put my mind to. I am thankful beyond belief. I wouldn’t trade anything I experienced this past year. Not one single thing.

I do not know what the future holds, none of us do. After the pattern and array of this past year, I do feel confident in saying bring it on. I’m not just up for the test, I embrace and welcome it.

Sending joyful Thanksgiving thoughts to each of you. I hope and pray the optimism I’m feeling is contagious and helps carry you through your own set of challenges. Be strong, stay safe, be well.