Who cares what day it is: share the love and shape a brain any day of the year.

Today I received a message that it was National I Care about you day - from someone who wanted me to know that they care about me. How lovely; being told that someone cares about us can make us feel significant or important. This sends a message to our brain to release the neurotransmitter, serotonin and this, in turn, boosts our sense of well-being and happiness. Some researchers also suggest it contributes mood balance. So telling someone that you care about them is more than just a passing thought.

I wanted to know more so I did some research on National Days websites. It seems there is some confusion over when this day actually takes place. Some sites suggest 25th October and others indicate that it happens in May. The Care Bears, who have been promoting the idea of caring for others since 1983, also have a National Share Your Care Day on 9th September. Their mission, all those years ago, was to teach children how to share feelings and care for others. This doubles the value of the gift of kindness because it promotes emotional literacy in the giver as well as encouraging the receiver to feel good.

Pablo Casals, a Spanish Cellist, shared his feeling that, "...the capacity to care is the thing which gives life its deepest significance".

On reflection, although it was another successful day for the procrastination gremlin that lives in my head, the real message coming through for me is that we don't need to wait for a national day to show we care. It would be more meaningful to the people that I care about, were I to say or show that I care more often, regardless of what day it is.

However, there can be no doubt that today is the fourth Thursday in November and therefore: Thanksgiving Day - and we don't have to live in Canada or the USA to celebrate the things we are grateful for on this, their national holiday.

Having decided that I can choose to show care on any day of the week; thanksgiving can manifest as a daily gratitude practice. A new addition to the apps on my phone (Journal 5) offers a daily reminder to make a note of the things I am grateful for (prior to this I was a bit ad hoc in my practice). What I noticed, by consciously adopting this positive habit, was that over the course of the month, not only did it become easier to find things I was grateful for, it changed my default mindset. When I started out I would mentally score points as I looked to find things I could add to my list each day (stimulating release of Dopamine: the reward hormone). Gradually I noticed that my outlook was changing from seeking out points of gratitude to one of acceptance that love and beauty is all around me and I would often stop to notice and give thanks for a moment, a tree, a kindness shown by others... the possibilities are endless. The benefits of Serotonin are evident here too. It has become impossible to list all the things I'm grateful for because I have developed a new way of seeing the world.

With a little bit of conscious awareness, perhaps bringing this same level of attention to how I demonstrate care and compassion for/to others will result in a paradigm shift in this area too. Thanks to the plasticity of our brain, it could certainly lead to some significant restructuring of the neuro-landscape inside my head.

Serotonin is not the only chemical in our brain to contribute to a sense of well-being and happiness. It is part of a happy band who collectively contribute to how we feel. The others are: Dopamine, Oxytocin, and Endorphins. These neurotransmitters and hormones are triggered regularly in our daily lives however, with the same level of conscious effort that led to my daily gratitude practice, we can move from being passive recipients to those who intentionally stimulate their flow.

As a brain-based coach, I work with clients to identify how their brain is serving them and how it can be optimised to serve them better. By specifically choosing behaviours that trigger the flow of these neurochemicals, we will experience a more positive state that shows up in heightened levels of motivation, creativity and productivity. What's more, we begin to notice an improved sense of well-being as we become more conscious and deliberate about the way we choose to behave.

I have mentioned the positive benefits of serotonin through showing care and reflecting on things we are grateful for in our day however; without the flow of Serotonin, we feel lonely and depressed. I also referred to the Dopamine boost derived from my point scoring behaviour when starting out on my daily gratitude journey. The pleasure that comes with Dopamine reinforces the behaviour hence the reason I continued to develop this habit. Again, there is a down-side if Dopamine is absent: we experience greater levels of self-doubt, we opt for the easier options and we have a tendency to procrastinate.

Just so I don't miss out the remaining neurochemicals that positively impact on our daily lives, there are simple strategies we can do to be sure we cover all four bases. Endorphins help to reduce anxiety and operates like a pain-killer or sedative to alleviate our perception of the pain we are feeling. Endorphins can be stimulated by exercising or having fun. In particular, laughter and causing others to laugh (or the anticipation of laughter) can create a release of Endorphins that make us feel better. And something as simple as a hug can release Oxytocin (also known as the trust chemical). However, this may not always be appropriate when working with clients, so sharing your sense of humour at work, bringing in cakes or small gifts, remembering an anniversary or even a hand on the shoulder can ensure the presence of Endorphins and Oxytocin to help build better relationships in your personal life or at work.

Along with the caring message I received this morning, was a request to send that message on to twenty friends to show them I was also thinking about and caring for them. I am grateful to that first person who sent me the message (you know who you are) and I am happy that I was able to send 20+ others to people who I do care about and who may be experiencing some positive neurochemicals right now because of it.