I’ve put this off for over a month now, but still feel compelled to write this review. So here it is.

It’s a gated community, which is great, but there’s no gate guard. You have to have a code to get in or arrive with someone living there who has a code. We sat at the gate for 15 mins before a nice resident punched in some code and got us and our Uber through the gate, then to the front desk for check in. Same thing when you check out. If nobody is at the front desk and your airport ride is calling from the gate, you have to walk with your bags down the road to the front gate in order to catch your ride.

Rooms are clean with good a/c and comfortable beds. Housekeeping staff was great and very friendly.

$100 per couple, per day for a day pass, but no wrist band or receipt to prove you paid. Each morning, you have to leave your room, walk to the front desk and buy another day pass. You can’t even buy a pass for the whole week on the first day you arrive. And if you go off base for the day to sight see, the first comment you get from the desk clerk when you walk back into the lobby is “have you paid your day pass?” Not hi, good morning or how are you. It’s “where’s our money” the second the lobby door closes. We couldn’t even go put our souvenir tshirts in our room, change into swimsuits and come back to buy the pass. It had to be done immediately.

You can’t bring in outside liquids or even bottled water to take to your room (we heard people talking about the front desk searching their bags for contraband) but you can get ice and water from a machine if you bring your own cup. One day we forgot our insulated cups in our room and when we asked for some ice and water, the bartender told us “I’m not supposed to do this” and handed us two plastic cups with an attitude like we just asked for her last kidney. We then had to hike across the hot pool deck, get our own ice and water from the machine, then hike back across the deck to sit down inside the bar to eat our lunch. What kind of bar doesn’t offer water?!?! They don’t mind serving you when you’re ordering ten dollar drinks of booze, but can’t or won’t provide water with your food???? They want to control the place like it’s an all inclusive resort, but not offer all inclusive amenities.

You can rent a cabana bed by the pool for 100 bucks, which turns into a 100 dollar credit at the pool bar. However, again, no receipts to show what you spent at the bar for the day using your 100 dollar credit. It’s the honor system of bar tending…they tell you your balance. You don’t get to see it. You also have to be at the front desk at 9 am each day to reserve a cabana bed. There’s no paying in advance for tomorrow or even paying for the bed at 8:30 on your way to town. It’s 9 am or nothing at all. If your bartender goes off shift for the day while you’re still at the pool having fun, they automatically close your tab, add 20 percent for the tip and open up a new tab with the new bartender. Again with the honor system. All cards. No cash. No receipt. Same honor system and automatic 20 percent tip at the nightclub when they close for the night and you haven’t tabbed out. It’s kinda hard to cut loose and go have fun when you’re having to remind yourself about your open tab or wondering how much longer your bartender is working for the day/night.

The “resort” concept is there, however, the “resort” delivery is not. It’s a geriatric, clothing optional Holiday Inn, surrounded by a trailer park and condos.