Excellent place to take a vacation. Great entertainment and service. Thank you Raquel, Alexis, Sebastian, Fernando, Mar and Nancy. Thank you all the restaurant staff. I hope to return again. Great for family and friends. If tour blessed you may make new friends as well.

Due to an unexpected misfortune, I stumbled upon this hotel thinking it was a legit “5 star” resort. To my disappointment, this is the OLDEST 5 star hotel in this area. That would explain why they still have an antiquated card reader - if it touches another electronic device such as a phone- it gets deactivated. So all you millennials and tech savvy generation- you were warned. For anyone that is of senior citizen status who needs glasses and XL font size on their phone- this would be the place for you :) also if you’re remotely athletic and want to use the gym at 7 pm like I did to release all the frustration with the airline’s multiple flight cancellations/delays— you will also be disappointed as their stupid hours are from 6 am- 7 pm Monday-Friday. The gym is also locked and the person who has the key must be some key hoarder Hiding it under their pillow because NO ONE else in the resort has access to another key. After an hour of trying to find someone to open that lock - which you would think housed the ruins of Athens or the coveted di Vinci painting - i sadly left to go walk around the property in hopes of getting some extra steps in. And then ....I came across A grossly sight...the buffet which was the only thing open at 9 pm since the other “restaurants” had to be reserved.
Ok , so I enter and looked at my choices. Sad uncooked green beans and carrots which I could only assume was leftovers from a nearby hospital ...a “pork station” with a guy carving pieces relentlessly for...guess who...NO ONE. a chicken station with carcasses of what I hoped was a real chicken. Who knows? Being primarily a pescatarian I gravitated towards the “fish station” hoping for a piece of grilled salmon (why not? It’s a “5 star resort” after all, right? WRONG) Not only did it not have salmon, it actually did not have any FISH options to cook besides a pile of disgusting fried fish. The guy couldn’t tell me what kind, he couldn’t grill any fresh fish since they didn’t have any (even though this resort is literally on a beach ) on the grill right next to him which I couldn’t understand why. All I knew is that he could put that atrocious fried thing in a tortilla with some green sauce. So I politely said “no gracias”
Ok so then I walked around and saw the bread station and thought who could f— up simple dough and butter? To my surprise- as I bit into it I thought this is what cardboard and string cheese would taste together. Butter smelled like plastic — maybe bec it’s so damn hot here that the plastic just melts into the butter?
Alright so my last option was dessert. As a dessert/sweet aficionado, I became slightly excited as I looked at the petit four station and picked a little cake. I smile and bite into it only to spit it out on a napkin because it tasted like rubber instead of a moist cake. Complete garbage. So if you have a sensitive refined palate like I do, you will be gravely disappointed.
Now on to the room, what can I say. I was transported to 1800 when there was no need for outlets. I’m currently sitting on this uncomfortable chair typing this review on a desk which must have been carved from one piece of huge wood block - because that is where the only visible outlet I could find to charge my phone. The decor? I don’t think my grandmother would even call this “charming” the bed? Well it has 3 sad lumpy pillows and the thinnest comforter/blanket ever created. The phone? Probably stolen from holiday inn. I didn’t even bother with the tv because there’s no remote in sight. You might be thinking what’s one positive ...I tried to ask myself that ...and after 34 minutes of pondering I realized the AC works and the toilet flushes.
In summary, if you want a 5 star experience I suggest you pick another place. BUT if you want an overpriced 1 star quality that claims to be 5 star targeted for a VERY MATURE audience with minimal room amenities then this is the place for you! :) happy travels !