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Request for class assignment in year 6 going to year 7

12 replies

Silentio · 05/07/2024 11:45

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Hi, my DS will start secondary school next year, other 5 kids from his current class will go to the same school, but one of them is quite problematic, he makes racist comments, specially agains asian people, he tease other kids because of their look, if someone is chubbier for example. He also makes comments about other kids’ parents, either about their look or if they are poorer. He keeps commenting about how much he has and how less other people have. It’s a very unpleasant person to be around with in general. I would like to ask the secondary school if they can be put in separate classes, I know it depends on ability, yesterday they did a CAT test, so I suppose the school will decide this month for next year. 
Do you think it’s inappropriate for me to ask the school this thing? I wouldn’t mention specific problems, just incompatibility.

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Shall I email the school to ask to have DS in a different class?

35 votes. Final results.

POLL
Email the school
57%
Leave it
43%
modgepodge · 05/07/2024 11:50

Schools will usually talk to primary schools to ask whether to split or put kids together, so if the primary are aware of the issues hopefully they’ll have passed these on. I thought most secondary schools also asked parents to say if there were any kids they like to be with but perhaps not.

id be surprised if form groups were based on ability though - this form of streaming for everything is quite old fashioned and generally not popular. They may be set for certain subjects eg English and maths, but I’d expect form groups to be mixed ability. So worth an email I’d say.

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Needmorelego · 05/07/2024 11:52

Just teach your child to ignore him and have nothing to do with him.
Unless told by a teacher to work together in a group (where your child should just be polite and get on with the work - the same adults frequently have to do at work with people they don't like) your child doesn't have to have anything to do with this other child.

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clary · 05/07/2024 13:18

Yeh agree, ask the school for him not to be in groups with your DS. But like @modgepodge I'd be surprised if the year was streamed on ability.

A lot of secondary schools have kids in a form, meeting once or twice a day, then in a teaching group, doing most lessons in that group, then often set for maths and sometimes other subjects (not so often in year 7 tho IME). He will probably be with a range of students.

If the child is racist tho, teach your son to flag it to a member of staff so it can be dealt with.

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Bluevelvetsofa · 05/07/2024 14:01

The forms will probably be organised by now, based on what primary staff and the children themselves have said. It takes ages to get a mix across all forms, half and quarter year groups.

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Floralnomad · 05/07/2024 14:06

Perfectly ok to email or ring the school , our son handles transition at his high school and he gets lots of these type of requests , you will not be alone

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lanthanum · 05/07/2024 17:43

Does this child target yours, or is he just a generally not-nice kid? If the former, then that's a good reason to ask about not being in the same class. If it's just that he's not a nice kid, then there's no reason why your child should be spared his company any more than anyone else. There will probably be other not-nice kids, and they'll spread them out between the forms.

Racism needs to be reported every time.

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cansu · 05/07/2024 17:45

I think you can try but be aware that in splitting your child from this kid he may well find himself separated from his other friends or some of them.

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Tiredalwaystired · 07/07/2024 08:46

I think it’s fine to specifiy if there is someone your child has problems with rather than pushing for them to be with a best friend).

Just be mindful that schools often mix classes up for some lessons so it doesn’t mean it will be for everything but will give him some respite for form time.

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RedToothBrush · 07/07/2024 08:54

So this is an ongoing bullying issue?

It doesn't sound like you have spoken to the school about it before and it certainly doesn't look like they have dealt with it.

Why?

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Silentio · 07/07/2024 12:26

So slightly more complicated, my son is not the direct target of the bullying; he has been teased and called fat (and us as well apparently) but it seemed something on and off so we didn't involved the school plus my son said he was ignoring these comments. Then they went on their redency just recently and my son came back in tears, he was in the same cabin with this kid and another Chinese friend. This kid made the Chinese friend a martyr, with racist comments and others implying he was poor, my son said he saw the friend crying in the bathroom and this friend told me "I know that if I'd die tomorrow no one would care" so my son, who is no hero, stayed by his side and try to defend him, and stay with him all the time. But as I said, he is not good at dealing with bully himself so he struggled a lot. He said he cried himself, he told the teachers who told him to "talk it out" which he did, but with no result. I told him I would be more than happy to talk to the mother of the this boy but he is worried he would definitely become the target.

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NeverDropYourMooncup · 07/07/2024 12:30

The new school will appreciate knowing that there are issues in advance, as then the first time he pipes up, they can nip it in the bud.

Citing general incompatibility is a waste of an email, though. It needs to be the specific racism and targeting people on the basis of disclosing the racist abuse.

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Floralnomad · 07/07/2024 19:35

@Silentio you need to go into school about what happened on the school residential , talk it out is not a reasonable answer from the teacher involved particularly if the kids are away from home and hence stuck in the situation .

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