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Bright Young Women Bright Young Women by Jessica Knoll
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“They will call you hysterical no matter how much dignity you have. So you might as well do whatever the hell you want.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Law enforcement would rather we remember a dull man as brilliant than take a good hard look at the role they played in this absolute sideshow, and I am sick to death of watching them in their pressed shirts and cowboy boots, in their comfortable leather interview chairs, in hugely successful and critically acclaimed crime documentaries, talking about the intelligence and charm and wiliness of an ordinary misogynist. This story is not that. The story is not that.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Time does not heal all wounds. Grief is just like a sink full of dirty dishes or a pile of soiled laundry. Grief is a chore you have to do and it's a messy one at that.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“I've tried to make sense of how someone who didn't stalk his victims in advance ended up going after the best and the brightest. And I think that's it, the thing they all had in common - a light that outshone his. He targets college campuses and sorority houses because he's looking for the cream of the crop. He wants to extinguish us - we are the ones who remind him that he's not that smart, not that good-looking, and there's nothing particularly special about him.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“There were men who cracked their knuckles while divulging to me what they would do to the defendant if they got the chance, thinking this was somehow reassuring for me to hear. But all it did was make me realize that there wasn't so big a difference between the man who brutalized Denise and half the men I passed every day on the street.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Women got that feeling about him, that funny one we all get when we know something isn't right, but we don't know how to politely extricate ourselves from the situation without escalating the threat of violence or harassment. That is not a skill women are taught, the same way men are not taught that it is okay to leave a woman alone if what she wants is to be left alone.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“anger in women is treated as a character disorder, as a problem to be solved, when oftentimes it is entirely appropriate, given the circumstances that trigger it.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“I have faith, because nature is the very best example of integration. Things grow differently when they’re damaged, showing us how to occupy strange new ground to bloom red instead of green. We can be found, brighter than before.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Right here, right now, I want you to forget two things: he was nothing special, and what happened was not random.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Things grow differently when they’re damaged, showing us how to occupy strange new ground to bloom red instead of green. We can be found, brighter than before.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you react to it.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Give me twenty minutes alone in a room with him,” Brian agreed, in a ravenous, juicy way that churned my stomach. This became something of a Rorschach test over the years. There were men who cracked their knuckles while divulging to me what they would do to The Defendant if they got the chance, thinking this was somehow reassuring for me to hear. But all it did was make me realize that there wasn’t so big a difference between the man who’d brutalized Denise and half the men I passed every day on the street.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“But mostly, I continue to be drawn to mediation because I know better than anyone that All-American Sex Killers are not born, that they come from broken and battered homes, human systems that fail them well before they reach the penal ones, and then they go out into a world that tells them that women are deserving depositories for their impotence and rage.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“The truth is something people will go to great lengths to keep for themselves. It shouldn't feel like a gift when you get it, but it is.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
tags: truth
“I should be prettier or less, depending on who was looking and when.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“In seventeen months, I would relish repeating this description for a courtroom. I’d had about enough of hearing how handsome he was, and no man likes to be called small.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“My parents spent a lot of money to neglect me, and I was always fantasizing about something awful happening that would force them to take care of me in ways money cannot.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“It is as inhuman to be totally good as it is to be totally evil.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“It made me feel diseased, how little I seemed to want the things that other women my age did without complication”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Grief is just like a sink full of dirty dishes or a pile of soiled laundry. Grief is a chore you have to do, and it's a messy one, at that.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Old souls are just people who had to fend for themselves ahead of their time.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“The Defendant did not like to be told what to do and when to do it and once jammed his jail cell keyhole with toilet paper so the guards couldn’t get in when they arrived to escort him to his arraignment. For this he was called cunning and clever, though I had a dog who also tore up toilet paper when he didn’t get enough attention”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“There was something about Denise’s excitement for a future she would never get to experience that made me murderous with grief. I couldn’t stand the idea of anyone coming into her room and pitying her, or, worse, judging her for having the audacity to make plans when she should have known God would laugh. That was a real thing people said down here, but fuck God for laughing and fuck Cosmopolitan too.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Hell, I’ll take him,” the driver said. “Give me fifteen minutes with the son of a bitch.” I stared at the back of his head in utter disbelief. Was there some sort of script men were instructed to follow in these kinds of situations? It was exactly the language Brian and Mr. McCall had used over dinner at the mansion in Red Hills.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Impossible grief is grief that does not adhere to a social contract of justice or human rituals that have existed since the dawn of time.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“But still I loved her. Still I wanted her to have the big, swaggering life she was destined to have, though I had come to accept it would likely not involve me.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“There was no way to tell which of us was there to ogle the Kennedy of Killers and which to testify against the booger-eating alcoholic who had picked up a heroin habit on the inside.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“Tina and I stared at each other for a long time after Shirley left, incredulous but also not. There should be a word for that. How very little people can surprise you. I suppose the word is jaded, but that’s not what I am. Because on the other side of this is someone like Tina, who taught me not to be surprised that people can be so good you will miss a week of work, drive through the night, and put yourself in harm’s way for them. Some people are your black swan event.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“women who wish to advance in their career face an insidious kind of discrimination, one that is not active, in-your-face sexism but, rather, no response at all. It was subtle discouragement by neglect, what the author called “motivational malnutrition.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women
“The haunted look on my father’s face as he recalled that night taught me a formative lesson. Other people’s pain mattered more than my own discomfort.”
Jessica Knoll, Bright Young Women

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