Welcome to this week's stressful/delightful recap of The Great British Bake Off!
This week, our brave bakers face off with bread. Here are 23 absolutely wonderful moments from the episode, plus 8 extremely stressful ones.
Warning: Spoilers (and potential emotional turmoil) ahead.
1. DELIGHTFUL: The opening sketch, which implies that Paul Hollywood's famous bread is so overrated, even a fish wouldn't want it for its last meal.
Signature Challenge: Focaccia
2. DELIGHTFUL: The fact that we've finally found Waldo.
3. DELIGHTFUL: Lizzie's suspicions about the sentience of bread.
4. STRESSFUL: Paul giving George this look when the contestant confessed that he didn't use all his water to make his dough.
5. STRESSFUL: This lil' bit of cupcake humor to remind us all that this wonderful slice of feel-good entertainment is being filmed during an ongoing pandemic.
6. DELIGHTFUL: The fact that me and Freya are clearly on the same page here.
7. DELIGHTFUL: Chigs playing along with Matt's invisible bread bit.
(Thankfully, Chigs' focaccia does eventually reappear.)
8. DELIGHTFUL: Noel's mild, mid-challenge existential crisis.
9. DELIGHTFUL: Rochica using her focaccia as a canvas on which to paint a vegetable garden.
10. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe receiving the season's first Paul Hollywood Handshake™, and then tearing up because he didn't believe it would ever happen to him.
TECHNICAL: Ciabatta Breadsticks
11. STRESSFUL: The ongoing existential crises of the hosts.
12. DELIGHTFUL: Noel leaning into it.
13. STRESSFUL: None of the bakers knowing how long to prove or bake their dough, and Crystelle's breadsticks ending up floppy because she only baked them for 15 minutes.
14. DELIGHTFUL: Jürgen's olive eyes.
15. STRESSFUL: The fact that being "bready" during Bread Week is a bad thing???
16. DELIGHTFUL: When Giuseppe, having already gotten the Paul Hollywood Handshake™, places first in the Technical!
Showstopper: A Themed Display Using Milk Bread
17. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe putting on his Serious Baking headband.
We now interrupt our regularly schedule program so Jürgen can explain what the hell milk bread is:
18. DELIGHTFUL: Freya claiming victory over Noel in an impromptu arm wrestling match.
19. DELIGHTFUL: A good old-fashioned Bake Off innuendo, courtesy of George.
20. STRESSFUL: The cold, dead, tinfoil eyes of Amanda's octopus.
21. DELIGHTFUL: Jürgen seeing a "bun in the oven" opportunity, and taking it.
22. STRESSFUL: The possibility that George's koala could fall right off its milk bread eucalyptus branch.
23. DELIGHTFUL: But then, from the jaws of defeat, George snatching glorious, adorable, marsupial victory.
24. DELIGHTFUL: Lizzie's milk bread pig, Susie.
25. STRESSFUL: The backstory of why, exactly, the sculpture is named Susie. (It's in tribute to Lizzie's dearly departed pet pig.)
26. DELIGHTFUL: Chigs' picnic basket. I mean, look at those GRAPES! Masterful.
27. STRESSFUL: Paul cutting into Jürgen's bread baby. I know it's bread, but I still audibly said, "You monster."
28. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe's truly sublime selection of fruits and vegetables.
29. DELIGHTFUL: Amanda's gorgeous octopus.
Reminds me of my favorite book.
Final Results
30. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe's serene expression as the Bake Off judges name him Star Baker, and Italy smiles down upon her favorite son.
31. STRESSFUL: Saying goodbye to Rochica, a truly delightful baker (and human being).
