Welcome to this week's stressful/delightful recap of The Great British Bake Off!
This week, our beloved bakers take on biscuits. Here are 17 utterly delightful moments from the episode, plus 14 ridiculously stressful ones.
Warning: Spoilers (and potential emotional turmoil) ahead.
1. DELIGHTFUL: The opening sketch, which casts Noel and Matt as doomed biscuits in the path of a voracious Paul Hollywood.
Signature Challenge: Brandy Snaps
2. DELIGHTFUL: Lizzie's "fast shoes." Honorable mention to her adorable daisy socks.
3. STRESSFUL: When Lizzie confessed — possibly within earshot of Paul "Cakes and Biscuits Are Serious Business" Hollywood — that she spent her practice time revisiting the Wizarding World.
4. DELIGHTFUL: The revelation that Freya spends her free time riding her horse, Winnie, on the beach and looking like the cover of a romance novel you can buy at the airport (in the best possible way).
5. DELIGHTFUL: When Jürgen got into the science of his biscuit filling.
6. DELIGHTFUL: Baby Giuseppe! Enough said.
7. STRESSFUL: Realizing that while other bakers are already baking their brandy snaps, Giuseppe made his filling first and still hasn't started the biscuit itself.
8. STRESSFUL: When Giuseppe dropped his second batch of biscuits, and my heart briefly stopped.
9. STRESSFUL: When Amanda's brandy snaps fell apart when Paul tried to pick one up.
10. DELIGHTFUL: When George was unhappy with his biscuits, and Prue offered some (typically posh) encouragement.
11. DELIGHTFUL: When both me and the judges realized that we were foolish to ever doubt Giuseppe's vast baking wisdom.
12. DELIGHTFUL: When Matt tasted Jürgen's snaps, then shook his hand.
Technical Challenge: Sandwiched Jammy Biscuits
13. STRESSFUL: When Rochica burned her first batch of jam, which I didn't even know you could do. To be honest, I've never thought about how jam is made before, and I guess I sort of assumed you just squished stuff? But apparently, heat is involved.
14. STRESSFUL: When the soft biscuit dough fell apart as Amanda (and some of her fellow bakers) attempted to cut out a heart shape as Hollywood commanded.
15. DELIGHTFUL: When Noel poetically described Paul Hollywood's butt, and Maggie wasn't *that* opposed to the idea.
16. DELIGHTFUL: When Jürgen joined in on the hosts' banter.
17. STRESSFUL: When Crystelle dropped her biscuits and my heart stopped yet again.
18. STRESSFUL: When Rochica's jammy biscuits were raw.
19. DELIGHTFUL: When Giuseppe gave Jürgen a new nickname when he came first in the Technical.
Do you see the resemblance?
Showstopper Challenge: A Functional Biscuit Model Of Your Favorite Childhood Toy
20. DELIGHTFUL: Maggie's story about growing up in a difficult era and making the beach itself her favorite toy.
21. STRESSFUL: When the motor for George's plane (because of course his biscuit has a motor) seemed like it was broken.
22. STRESSFUL: When one of the masts of Jairzeno's toy ship broke off, and all he could do was laugh.
23. DELIGHTFUL: George's expression of contented triumph when his plane's motor started working again.
24. STRESSFUL: When Amanda's biscuit rocking horse completely fell apart.
25. STRESSFUL: When Prue played Rochica's game and then immediately snapped off a piece.
Crystelle is all of us in that moment.
26. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe's absolutely perfect board game.
27. DELIGHTFUL: Chigs' gorgeous snooker table.
28. DELIGHTFUL: When Prue had Paul model a biscuit earring from Crystelle's showstopper.
Final Results
29. STRESSFUL: When Matt did a bit about George possibly being Paul's long-lost son.
30. DELIGHTFUL: Jürgen being named Star Baker for the second week in a row! He pretends to be surprised, and Humble Jürgen is truly my second favorite Jürgen. (The top spot goes to Sassy Jürgen, naturally.)
31. STRESSFUL: Saying goodbye to Jairzeno, who has immaculate vibes.
