They don’t come in swarms but they land at a steady clip, these reader letters probing why The Times refers to some women as “Ms.” and others as “Mrs.” This week, readers were circling the convention coverage, suspicious as to why Donald Trump’s wife, Melania, was labeled “Ms.” Trump while the president’s wife, Michelle Obama, was deemed a “Mrs.” One person writing in suggested that whoever made this decision must have intended to disparage the Trump marriage.
“It seems like some readers think a bunch of old fat bald men are making these decisions,” joked Greg Brock, senior editor for standards.
On this occasion, anyway, they were not. It’s the women who get to choose their courtesy titles at this modern institution. According to The Times’s internal rules, women will be referred to as “Ms.” unless they’ve elected to be a “Mrs.” Michelle Obama chose Mrs. back when her husband was seeking the White House. As for Melania Trump, she has yet to express a preference (thus the default “Ms.,” although reporters have been asked to determine her preference).
Such decisions don’t always hold to stereotype. Hillary Clinton, one might think, would chose the more progressive title “Ms.” But she prefers “Mrs.” Sarah Palin, on the other hand, surprised Times editors when she chose to be a “Ms.” during her vice-presidential campaign days rather than the more traditional “Mrs.” (As for me, readers may have noticed, I have decided to wield the vast powers of the public editor’s office and dispense with courtesy titles in my pieces altogether. Call me Spayd.)
Mr. Brock maintains his humor when he’s responding to readers:
Dear Dr./Miss/Mrs./Ms. XXX:
The Times’s style for many years has been to let each woman we write about decide what her courtesy title will be. All women are referred to by “Ms.” until they express a preference. Michelle Obama wants to be “Mrs.” Obama. Sarah Palin wants to be “Ms.” Palin in the pages of The Times. Hillary Clinton wants to be “Mrs.” Clinton. Condoleezza Rice, because of her degree, could have been called “Dr.” Rice when she was secretary of state (as Dr. Kissinger demanded that he be called). But she told us that she wanted to be “Ms.” Rice. We obliged.
Of course, we could simplify this by being discourteous — like all other publications in the United States — and not use courtesy titles at all. Those publications refer to Donald Trump’s wife as “Trump” on second reference. Michelle Obama is simply “Obama” on second reference. To me, that is the height of rudeness. (One exception: The Wall Street Journal continues to use courtesy titles.)
So the references you see to Ms. Trump and Mrs. Obama are not there because we stayed up until the wee hours of the morning trying to figure out the best way to disrespect someone or question the validity of their marriage. We do not think it is up to The Times — or to anyone — to decide on behalf of Ms. Trump or Mrs. Obama what courtesy title will be used for them.
Thank you, Mr. Brock, and have a good weekend everyone.