When you're ready to bring a baby on board, you might be curious about the best sex positions to get pregnant. Truth is: There aren't any.
Contrary to old wives' tales about conception, 'any sex position is fine,' says Dr. Catherine Goodstein, MD, an OB-GYN based in New York City. 'There are those who speculate that deeper penetration is helpful for getting pregnant, but there are no studies proving this to be the case.'
The theoretical mechanics of deep penetration positions, like missionary and doggy style, make sense. After all, the further the penis is inserted into the vagina when ejaculation occurs, the closer the sperm are to the cervix, and therefore an egg. 'But that’s assuming the sperm are normal and they move normally, and there's a normal number [of them],' says Dr. Jillian Lopiano, MD, MD, an OB-GYN and the Chief Health Officer at Wisp, an online sexual and reproductive healthcare company. What’s more important, she explains, is whether or not deep penetration actually feels comfortable for the receiving partner because suffering through painful intercourse in pursuit of pregnancy isn’t worth it.
Not only is there no data backing up the deep penetration theory, but it may be ineffective for other reasons too. 'No matter how close you get the sperm to the cervix, if someone has tubal infertility, they [the sperm] still need to get up into the uterus and meet the egg,' says Dr. Lopiano. (FYI: Tubal infertility is caused by blocked fallopian tubes that prevent the sperm from reaching an egg or a fertilised egg from entering the uterus, according to Columbia University Irving Medical Center.)
Instead of concentrating on specific 'effective' sex positions, simply 'focus on what is comfortable and what feels good to you and what you enjoy,' says Dr. Lopiano. 'If the only way you enjoy having sex is by being on top, then go for it. Plenty of people have gotten pregnant in that position.' Take that, gravity!
'Feel free to express yourself however you want to, as long as it involves semen in a vagina,' adds Dr. Lyndsey Harper, MD, an OB-GYN, associate professor at Texas A&M Health Science Center College of Medicine, and founder/CEO of Rosy, a women's health technology company. 'Outside of that, the position doesn't really matter.'
So, what does? Ahead, the experts explain what you should focus on—and avoid—when trying to conceive:
How to *actually* increase your chances of getting pregnant
1. Focus on timing.
'Timing is the most important thing [because] you want to have sex while you're ovulating,' says Dr. Lopiano. 'That is the best way to get pregnant.' She has some recommendations for maximising your fertility window:
- If you tend to have a regular 28-day cycle, you can aim to have sex when you’re ovulating on/around day 14. One way to tell it's time: 'A few days before until a few days after ovulation, the cervix actually makes a mucus that kind of looks like egg whites,' says Dr. Harper. 'And that egg white discharge actually helps the sperm to get wherever it needs to go through the cervix out into the fallopian tubes where fertilisation happens.' (The more you know!)
- Taking your basal body temperature is a 'good, inexpensive way' to track the ovulation phase of your cycle, says Dr. Lopiano. But your temp checks must become a consistent part of your morning routine. You need to take your temp the second you wake up (before you do anything), and the temperature differences are quite subtle, increasing by a small fraction around the time of ovulation, per Dr. Lopiano. But it’s doable, especially if you love a schedule.
- You can use an ovulation predictor kit—available online and at pharmacies—to find your fertile window. 'The key to these is reading them correctly. What you're looking for is your LH surge, or a surge in your luteinising hormone, and that happens right around the time of ovulation, usually about the day before,' says Dr. Lopiano. 'Depending on the type of kit you buy, they're a little bit easier or harder to read.' Generally speaking, the more cost-effective options will require you to read the lines on a strip, which can be challenging to understand. More expensive kits tend to be easier to interpret—you'll get a smiley face or a clear alert when you’re ovulating. 'Depending on how long you've been trying to get pregnant and your ability to pay, ovulation predictor kits can be a really useful tool for timing intercourse,' says Dr. Lopiano.
2. Optimise your overall health and well-being.
'You want to be healthy as your own person first,' says Dr. Lopiano. To that end, Dr. Goodstein recommends booking a preconception counseling visit with your OB before starting to try to conceive. And while you're at it, she suggests making the rounds with your other providers, such as internists, dentists, dermatologists, etc. 'Many of these providers would feel more comfortable treating a condition prior to a patient getting pregnant,' Dr. Goodstein explains.
If you have any pre-existing conditions, like hypertension or diabetes, or take any medications that might be dangerous for pregnancy such as Vitamin A, it's also best to talk to your doctors about how best to manage these health factors, says Dr. Lopiano. You'll also want to make sure your vaccination status is up to date, and that you avoid environmental hazards, such as lead and mercury, adds Dr. Goodstein.
Beyond prioritising your physical healthcare, 'if you have mental health conditions, make sure that [your mental health] is in a good space before you start trying,' says Dr. Lopiano.
3. Lean into healthy lifestyle habits.
You don't need to revamp your daily routine the second you decide to try to conceive, but 'focus on living the healthiest version of your life that you possibly can,' says Dr. Harper. The experts recommend the following healthy habits:
- Quit smoking. ('Tobacco can adversely affect one's ability to conceive,' says Dr. Goodstein.)
- Cut out all drug use.
- Minimise alcohol use.
- Exercise regularly.
- Limit caffeine intake to 200 milligrams a day. (Data shows that decreasing caffeine intake does increase likelihood of successful pregnancy, per Dr. Harper.)
- Practice good nutrition and maintain a healthy body weight.
- Take prenatal vitamins.
- Stay hydrated. ('Have water as your main source of what you choose to drink.' says Dr. Harper.)
'All of those healthy lifestyle choices are great to have in place as you're trying to get pregnant,' says Dr. Lopiano.
4. After intercourse, lay on your back—so long as it's comfortable.
First, a disclaimer: You don't need to worry about sperm dripping out of you immediately after having sex, says Dr. Lopiano, but 'the more semen that stays inside the vagina, the better your chances are.' So if you're thinking about conception from a numbers standpoint, and laying flat on your back is comfortable for you, you might as well try it.
'Conventional wisdom says to remain lying down for 15-20 minutes after sex to increase the chance that sperm make their way through the cervix through gravity,' says Dr. Goodstein. 'This can include propping your bottom up on a pillow, resting your legs up a wall, but this has never been proven.'
Dr. Harper echoes this sentiment: 'There's no data to suggest that it makes a difference at all. What you do for the first few minutes after you have sex is completely up to you, and there's likely very little harm in laying down for a few minutes, but there's also there's not any proven benefit either.'
TL;DR: This technique may be nothing more than an old wives' tale, but it's relatively harmless, so if you want to try it, you totally can.
What to avoid when trying to get pregnant
Sometimes, knowing what not to do is just as important as knowing what advice is actually worth following. Here, the experts share what you should steer clear of when trying to conceive:
1. Vaginal products that claim to help conception
It's best to refrain from putting anything inside the vagina that doesn't belong there to achieve pregnancy, says Dr. Lopiano. Feel free to continue using your standard tampons and sex toys, she adds, but if you hear of any insertable products that claim to aid conception, they're not worth trying.
2. Douching
Not only is this vaginal 'cleaning' practice unnecessary, but it will actually damage the sperm and the normal flora of your vagina, says Dr. Lopiano.
3. Pools and hot tubs
'Pools and hot tubs can be negative for conception because of the heat and chemicals,' Dr. Lopiano explains. 'That said, it's not protective against pregnancy. Just because you had sex in a hot tub doesn't mean you can't get pregnant.'
4. Stress
You probably can't avoid stress completely because... life, 'but doing what you can to minimise external stressors' can help with conception, says Dr. Harper. She recommends creating healthy boundaries for yourself, finding peace and calm in your everyday life, and doing your best to choose relaxing and joyful activities whenever possible.
The same applies to the stress you may be putting on yourself if you've been trying to conceive and it hasn't happened yet. 'It's a good thing that there's so much more awareness now towards tracking our cycles and what's happening with our bodies... but it can also lead us to a state of being hyper-aware and hyper-focused on all the little tiny details,' Dr. Harper says. 'In the early days, just try to be relaxed. Make sure you're having sex regularly, about once or twice a week, [there's] no need to kind of get super intense about all the all the details.'
What if I follow all these tips and still can't get pregnant?
If you're under the age of 35 and have been trying for a year with no success, experts' general consensus is to make an in-person fertility visit, says Dr. Lopiano.
'But if you're not having regular periods or if you can't figure out what's going on, you can always have a chat with your women's healthcare provider or OB-GYN so they can make sure you're ovulating and that everything's on track for success,' Dr. Harper says.
Ultimately, if you're struggling to conceive, 'it's very important to know that you should not do so alone,' she adds. 'There are compassionate and educated experts who really do want to help and reassure you.' Also, you should feel empowered enough to find a different healthcare provider if you're not getting the help you want from your current provider. 'Don't suffer in silence. Don't feel alone, isolated, or unheard,' Dr. Harper says. Instead, she encourages want-to-be parents to feel reassured that, most of the time, people do achieve pregnancy on their own—in pretty much every position possible.
Meet the Experts: Dr. Catherine Goodstein, MD, is an OB-GYN at Carnegie Hill, a private practice in New York City, and a clinical instructor in Obstetrics, Gynecology and Reproductive Science at Mount Sinai. Dr. Jillian Lopiano, MD, is an OB-GYN and the Chief Health Officer at Wisp, an online sexual and reproductive healthcare company. Dr. Lyndsey Harper, MD, is an OB-GYN, an associate professor at Texas A&M Health Science Center College of Medicine, and the founder/CEO of Rosy, a women's health technology company.
More on pregnancy...
- Why folic acid is vital to take during pregnancy
- Dispatches from my plus-size pregnancy
- How to enjoy sex during pregnancy
Lindsay Geller is the Lifestyle Director at Women’s Health, where she oversees the Life, Sex & Love, and Relationships sections on WomensHealthMag.com and the Mind section of Women's Health magazine. When she's not writing or editing articles about the latest dating trends and pop culture phenomenons, she's usually watching reality TV or playing with her dog, Lucille (Go Fetch That) Ball.
