Quick backstory - fascinated by the positive end of the wellbeing spectrum, I decided to do the exact opposite of what most of other psychologists were doing. My idea was this; what would happen if instead of studying mental illness, we studied wellness?
So that’s what I set out to do. I surveyed a whole bunch of people to gauge how happy they are and plotted them onto a wellbeing graph. The hugely simplified cartoon version looks a little bit like this…
Broadly speaking, if we measure levels of happiness and wellbeing on the lollipop chart, most people in the developed world inhabit the ‘perfectly fine’ zone. We generally have reasonable health, a roof over our head, a fridge full of food and a comfy bed. In terms of happiness, most people are ‘mildly happy most of the time’.
However, the last few years has seen change accelerate to warp speed. Climate emergency, social media, technology, algorithms, neurodiversity, epidemics, pandemics, artificial intelligence, fake news, wars… in such challenging times, even those who were ‘perfectly fine’ have begun to run on empty and before you know it, low level negativity has kicked in. The bottom third of the wellbeing chart is characterised by a background noise of tutting and low-level grumbling.
Please note, I’m absolutely NOT talking about people with clinical issues. They exist at the bottom of the chart, in the danger zone. I’m talking about those who can expertly skewer you with a negative remark that drags you down to their level.
You end up wishing you had a Netflix’s ‘Skip Intro’ button, but for conversations. The negative zone is inhabited by people who light up the room, when they leave!
In my research I call it languishing, but I’ve heard those who get stuck in the negative zone referred to as dementors, energy vampires, mood hoovers or drains.
40% extra happiness!
Personally, I’d much rather inhabit the other end of the wellbeing spectrum so I flipped psychology on its head and turned my attention to the small percentage of people at the top of the wellbeing chart.
I nickname them the ‘two-percenters’ on the basis that there aren’t very many of them. These people have 30% more happiness and 40% more energy than the emotional drains.
They’re the radiators! The happy ones, the flourishing few, the statistical outliers, those who are genuinely living their best lives… I wanted to know 3 things:
1. The people who are feeling amazing on a regular basis, who the heck are they?
2. What are they doing that allows them to flourish?
3. Most importantly, what can we learn from them that we can apply to ourselves so we have a better chance of achieving mental WEALTH.
Basically, I started my research for purely selfish reasons. Those two-percenters who are in love with life, I wanted to be one!
The good news and truly fabulous news
There are two bits of good news about being a two-percenter. First, and most obviously, being your ‘best self’ more of the time (which is essentially what a two-percenter is) will fundamentally change the rest of your life, at work and home. You, in ‘two-percenter mode’ will be happier, more creative, resilient, positive and energetic.
Second, and best news of all, there are tremendous side effects of feeling amazing. Human emotions are contagious so when you’re functioning at your best, you create an emotional uplift in those around you. So sure, being a two-percenter is good for you, but it also spills out into your family, friends, work colleagues, neighbours and community.
So if emotions are contagious (which they absolutely are!), the big questions is what are people catching off you?
The bottom line is very simple. The difference between being a radiator or drain will drastically affect your life, but will also affect the lives of those closest to you.
You can drag people up, or you can take them down! My advice is to swell the ranks of the two-percenters, and pass it on!
Dr Andy Cope is a happiness expert, positive psychologist and author of The Art of Being Brilliant
