As one of the "world's great intellectuals" you certainly excelled yourself last week. You admitted to sedating Her Majesty, fuelling Margaret Thatcher's coke habit, turning the Dalai Lama into a drug dealer and more importantly drawing a veil over the Spice Girls. Salman Rushdie, eat your heart out!
Christine Swann, Essex
Only you could charter a boat for 250 people when your party was a modest six. That is either gross excessiveness or extreme style. I wonder which.
Adam Osborn, Malaga, Spain
You've recommended Assaggi in Notting Hill. I made a reservation well in advance for four people at 9pm. When I phoned to say we'd now be two people the manager said we could only come at 6pm and be out by 9. I thought the manager was having a bad day, or a laugh. How would you react to this?
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Lewis Davis, London
Having followed your column for years, I now understand Winner's Law. Where an establishment panders to your inflated ego and is thus highly praised, the food will be massively overrated. Where you're treated like the rest of us mere mortals, you slate heavily. Then the food is likely to be excellent and worth an immediate visit.
John Smetana, London
Michael, would you describe yourself as a modest man?
Anthony Roberts, West Sussex
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