What I’ve learnt: Eddie Izzard

Comedian and actor Eddie Izzard, 54, made his West End debut in 1993 with his one-man show. Since then, he’s starred in films including Valkyrie and Ocean’s Thirteen, run 70 marathons (43 consecutively in 2009 and 27 this year) and toured Europe in three different languages. He lives in London.

I’m not a transvestite. I have some of the same genetics as women, so I’m transgender. When I see a pair of nice heels I think, “Yeah, that could work. That could be kind of fun, kind of sexy.” Anyone can feel that. We’re obsessed with the differences between someone with a penis and someone with a vagina. Everyone should calm down and take a chill pill.

It’s lovely when people say nice things about you. Although I’m sure when I get into politics they’ll say less nice things. I want to become a Labour MP in 2020.

You can’t train for 43 consecutive marathons. They say you should train for four months before you run one. On that basis, I should’ve trained for 14 years. You’re just not going to do that, are you? It’s all about training your mind. Everything I’ve done in my life so far has been mental preparation.

If we leave the EU, you can wave goodbye to the United Kingdom. The whole idea of running and hiding is flawed. Scotland would have a referendum, leave us and stay with Europe. Everyone knows that. We may as well go back to pounds, shilling and pence.

Fears are there to be conquered. I’ve toured France in French; I’ve toured Germany in German. I’ve gone from playing the streets of London to the Hollywood Bowl. I taught myself to fly because I’m scared of flying. But the biggest thing I ever did was walk out of the door 31 years ago in heels and make-up.

I couldn’t live without red wine. That’s how I relax. That and watching black and white movies.

I like playing tenacious bastards. It’s a default mode for me. Although interestingly two of my recent roles have been Wolfe, a mass murderer who eats people, and Abel Gideon, a mass murderer who eats himself.

Shopping for clothes is a faff. It’s a lot of effort trying things on and wondering whether this would match with that. But it’s great when you come home with a good piece. I describe my look as classic with a twist.

I would’ve been a soldier if I knew which war I’d have to fight. I was ready to apply, but if you join the armed forces, you fight where you’re sent. That’s the deal. You can’t wake up and say, “I’m not sure about this one,” or, “Not today, thank you!” I parked the idea.

My dream dinner party would be full of brilliant men. I’d invite Nelson Mandela, Abraham Lincoln, Mozart, Che Guevara, Beethoven, John Lennon and possibly Charlie Chaplin. We’d eat sausages, egg and chips.

Fame has given me confidence. At least, if it went away, I think I’d lose confidence. And confidence is sexy!

The reason I do everything I do is to impress my mother. I loved her very much. She died when I was six years old. I used to wake up in the night and she’d bring me milky coffee in bed. Of course I have a rosy, glowing image of my mother, but apparently she was very nice. In some way I feel like if I do enough she might come back. Obviously, that’s not going to happen.

All spiders are not nice. Except money spiders; they’re welcome.

If I look at my life, I could never have predicted what I’ve done before and what I’m going to do next. But everything I do is to push against things that are tricky or scary. People might shout me down, but determination is my most useful quality.

Eddie Izzard stars in the crime drama Powers, starting on May 13 on Spike at 9pm