Tom Stubbs — Talking trousers

What activity could be more simple and pure than homo erectus bounding across the earth’s surface? I’m addicted and devoted to running. It builds strength, clears the head and induces a natural feeling of freedom, coupled with a tangible buzz. It’s a simple pleasure — unless you elect to complicate the scene by introducing all manner of advanced sportswear, fashion issues and technology. Keep it simple? No thanks. Baggy old marl T-shirts and football shorts send the wrong message. Instead, get involved with the ultra-sport look for running. Like a Tron operative, I career up Notting Hill Gate, so high on endorphins that my mood is like that of a red setter who’s just escaped being neutered. Shoe-wise, I have always favoured a technical running shoe by the Japanese shoe deity Asics. I wear the Gel DS Racer or the Gel Forster Tri (above: £80; 01925 241041), which are mental-looking and feature breakthrough “speed laces”. The look continues with vivid techno-Lycra breathable top and shorts, teamed with over-the-top bins and iPod as standard. For information and analysis overload, I employ an arm-mounted satellite speed/distance sensor, combined with a heart-rate monitor, which feeds into a wristwatch (right: Timex Trail Runner system, £300 for all four elements; 020 8326 6900). Colourful, streamlined and futuristic, the look is sort of tongue-in-cheek, and I admit that I look like a pillock. Once up and running, though, it all makes sense. Dressed like this, you can’t afford to dawdle. You have to leg it all the way. Dressing as mugger bait is good motivation. I’d mug me, if only I could catch me.