1. The volcano. Everybody be cool. Nothing to see here. It’s just that a small, angry, pulsating head has grown in a very obvious part of your face. These mega-spots travel alone and are usually associated with a bout of wild and toxic living: eating loads of cakes, guzzling booze and caffeine, falling asleep in your make-up, that kind of thing. You need a proper, fast-acting chemical weapon: Murad Blemish Spot Treatment (£19.50; marksandspencer.com). It contains sulphur, which works quickly to shrink the spot and prevent eruptions.
2. The zit that mustn’t be seen in public. Code red. Or is that code yellow? You just have to cover that blighter up. In a recent emergency, I tried Oxygenetix Oxygenating Foundation Acne Control (£55; cultbeauty.co.uk) on the recommendation of facialist to the supermodels, Debbie Thomas. It gave convincing, lasting camouflage and, thanks to salicylic acid, calmed the spot considerably. Says Thomas, “Salicylic acid is great for acne. It helps unblock pores, reduces oil production and is anti-inflammatory and antibacterial.” She advises against manual interference: “Try not to squeeze, but if you must, make sure the spot has a head and only squeeze with clean hands and a tissue.” Eeeuw.
3. Hormonal spots. Time of the month, is it? Those pinprick-sized bumps around the chin are as good a sign as any that the painters are on their way. A hippy facialist once told me that spots around the mouth are nature’s way of telling you that you’re not speaking your mind enough. To be honest, I think it’s better at certain times that I keep my cross thoughts to myself and use Dermalogica Overnight Clearing Gel (£31.40; dermalogica.co.uk), which seems to head off zits at the pass.
4. The classic. It’s not so bad that people start talking to it instead of you, but an annoyance in your T-zone nonetheless. Hollywood facialist Nichola Joss says, “Look for blemish serums that you can apply to the skin to prevent breakouts, such as Sanctuary Spa Deep Cleanse Facial Blemish Serum (£10; boots.com), which helps shrink pores to prevent them clogging up in the future. Use products with ingredients such as lavender oil or tea-tree oil, which will calm the skin.”
5. The spot that keeps on giving. The ones that take more than a week to go and then leave behind a scar for another month. There is a brilliant product for these from French pharmacy brand La Roche-Posay called Effaclar Duo (£13.50; boots.com), which takes care of the spot as well as fading out the aftereffects. Particularly good for dark skins, where the scars are more noticeable.
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6. Blackheads. These are just grimy pores. I’d advise a good, clay-based face mask to clean them out. I have been impressed by Diptyque’s skincare line, in particular the Multi-Use Exfoliating Clay (£44; diptyqueparis.co.uk), which you can use as an exfoliator or leave on for five minutes to set and it will draw out impurities.