Ever heard the saying, “sex, oysters and rock ‘n’ roll”? No, well apparently Kylie chucks them down her throat as a pre-concert pep and Coldplay’s Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow regularly enjoy a plate of oysters washed down with a pint of Guinness at their local, The Cow, in Westbourne Grove, West London.
Since the Romans first brought oysters to our shores, the pearly molluscs have shifted up a few status gears. They were common as muck in Pepys’s London and food for urchins, according to Charles Dickens. These days, however, oysters enjoy a loftier profile: reserved for power-lunching politicians and perma-tanned jetsetters at airport seafood bars.
In fact, it is only in recent years that the scientific basis for the nutritional benefits of oysters has been established. Dr Hannah Theobald, a nutrition scientist at the British Nutrition Foundation, says: “Oysters are a nutritious low-calorie (39 calories per six raw oysters), high-protein food. They are usually consumed raw and so retain all their goodness.” Oysters are a good source of iron, calcium, mag nesium, selenium, iodine and phosphorus, and an excellent source of vitamin B12, zinc and copper.
“Eating oysters promotes healthy blood cells, a strong immune system, good metabolism and sound neurological function,” Theobald says. “Some people are concerned about the relatively high cholesterol content in shellfish. It is now known that cholesterol from the diet does not influence blood cholesterol in most people; rather a diet high in saturated fat does. As oysters are a low-fat food, their saturated fat content is also low — so they won’t raise blood cholesterol levels.” But they are higher in sodium than other seafood (306mg in six, equivalent to 0.8g of salt for 60g, compared to say 0.3g for 60g prawns).
Oysters, for the time being, are a superfood. The Belgians buy them at food stores like we buy, say, fishfingers and crabsticks. But finding oysters in the UK can be like diving for pearls. “First you have to make oysters available and then convince people to try them,“ says Richard Haward, 59, an oyster farmer on the island of West Mersea, in Essex. Brits are at best ambiguous about swallowing live bivalves. So how do you re-invent oysters for a nation reared on fish-and-chips? “It’s a slow process. Fishmongers are disappearing and many people, including supermarkets, are apprehensive about oysters,” says Haward, who hopes to strike a deal with Waitrose. At his stall at London’s foodie mecca, Borough Market, a typical conversation is: “Do you like oysters?” “No.” “Have you tried oysters?” “No.” “So I give them a taster,” says Haward. Responses range from “yuk!” to “yum!”
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Haward carries the baton of a 200-year-old family tradition of oyster farming on West Mersea. Standing at the end of the jetty, an upright oar in one hand, with his sun-burnished face, bushy white beard and yellow PVC dungarees, he is the image of a children’s storybook fisherman. Very early one morning he takes me out on to the Blackwater River creek on his battered skiff. The water is still and muddy green, and punctuated by withies — thin, bare trees that mark the oyster beds. It’s low tide and his son, Joe, 23, is out on the marshy edges of the creek tipping year-old hatchery-bred oysters out of mesh bags on to the riverbed. They will feed on the plankton-rich water for up to four years. Joe wears splatchers, square wood-block sandals, to prevent him sinking and pushing the oysters into the mud and suffocating them.
Haward’s 360-yard stretch of water holds more than 500,000 oysters — a small fortune when converted to restaurant prices of up to £3 each. In the whole creek there are 1.5million oysters. Next year the flat West Mersea oyster, known as a Colchester native, is set to join the likes of Stilton and Newcastle Brown Ale as one of 34 British products on the EU’s list of 600 protected regional specialities. Haward says this recognition could be a turning point. When we dredge the middle of the creek with what looks like a giant lacrosse stick attached to a mechanical pulley, Haward sifts through his haul: squirts, rock oysters (a common softer variety in a razor-sharp craggy shell), native oysters, crabs, slipper limpets and seaweed. He shucks a few to monitor the crop. Out of every 100 that he opens, a dozen may not be good enough to sell. He tends to eat these rejects himself.
“In hot summers they spawn a lot and are not so fleshy because they don’t get enough oxygen and plankton,” says Haward. The concentration of food in the water and its cleanliness are key factors for a plump, sweet-salt oyster that measures the legal 2in (5cm) in diameter. “But to some degree what makes a good oyster is one of nature’s mysteries,” he adds. Like a wine taster, Haward is able to determine provenance. “Oysters from Cornwall have a tinny taste that comes from the local mines, while Colchesters are salty, as the rivers are among the saltiest in the country.” The rock oysters I taste have a briny taste and a coppery mineral note. Their sheer freshness makes me feel good.
Back on land the oysters are put in purification tanks for 42 hours and then graded. It’s mid-morning and already a BMW and convertible Mercedes sit incongruously outside Haward’s weather-beaten Company Shed fishmonger’s and eatery. Chalked on a blackboard outside is a list of treats: salmon terrine, cooked lobster, dressed crabs, crevettes. It’s barely time for elevenses and already a table of oldies are tucking into the cold seafood platter (£8 a head).
The Company Shed began 15 years ago by selling potted crab through a hatch. Haward’s wife, Heather, runs a tight ship. After a hard morning at sea we’re refused a cup of tea on the basis that she doesn’t make tea for men. A curt notice informs customers that they can bring their own bread and drinks, but nothing else — one group is asked to put away a bag of salad. But this is no-frills, fresh-fish brunch at its rawest best. There’s a makeshift beach-bar feel to the place with its church pews, assorted glasses and rolls of kitchen towels on the tables. Why does it work? “It’s very basic, innit, which is a great leveller. It’s more like a home than a restaurant, not at all posh,” Heather jokes in her farmer-meets-Essex-girl accent.
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It seems like a good time to ask the aphrodisiac question — for centuries oysters have been linked to a healthy sex drive: Casanova is said to have gulped down 60 a day. “Having a plate of oysters is like a Japanese tea ceremony — a pleasant ritual that’s part of the build-up to sex,” says Heather. She adds that men often ask quietly for a plate of oysters, as if ordering a top-shelf magazine. “They say the high zinc content is good for your sperm,” says Joe, who recently met his wife-to-be “On my wedding night I’m going to chuck down six and see if they work.”
The Company Shed, West Mersea, Essex, open 9am-5pm Tues-Sat, 10am-5pm Sun; Mersea Seafood Festival, including an oyster dredging match, September 4-5; 01206 382700 for both
OUT OF YOUR SHELL
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For 500 years people have avoided eating oysters in months without an “r” — namely May to August; this gives the oysters a season in which to develop. Those available from May to August may have been frozen, or could be rock oysters which develop all year. September 1 heralds the oyster season.
OYSTER FESTIVALS Galway, including the World Oyster Opening Championships, September 23-26 (00-353-91 522066). Falmouth, October 7-10 (01326 377321, www.falmouthoysterfestival.com).
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STORING Oysters can be kept in the fridge for up to one week. Never leave in water.
SERVING Serve with the flatter side of the shell facing up, and the “cupped” side down. Discard shells that are not tightly closed.