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The Compleat Angler, Marlow, Buckinghamshire

The Times sends a writer under the covers...

The Compleat Angler looked promising. The hotel sits prettily by the Thames at Marlow, with terraces overlooking the water and boats gliding past in the sunshine. There was a nice smiley welcome from Sybilla on reception and a pleasant-faced young man took us through corridors lined with fish-print wallpaper to our room, the Silver Doctor (all the rooms are named after fishing flies). The hotel name comes from the way Isaak Walton spelt the word “complete” in 1653 when he wrote his famous guide to fly fishing.

The room was a disappointment. It was tastefully decorated in a mix of neutral colours and jaunty checks but it was small for the B&B price of £185 — about 12ft by 10ft. The bathroom was pristine, with nice robes and generous toiletries, but the extractor fan sounded like a helicopter landing in Vietnam.

We repaired to the terrace for pre-dinner drinks overlooking the river, ordered a bottle of ros? and tried to engage the waiter in conversation. “Lovely day, isn’t it?” I said. “I no speak English,” he replied, without smiling. We had more luck with a second waiter, who brought a plate of bread so I could feed the swans.

Then we moved into the Alfresco Brasserie where our fellow diners were a mixed bunch. Well-dressed Japanese bowing to each other, young couples holding hands. There was also a middle-aged man in those peculiar cut-off trousers and a T-shirt. His mobile went off twice but no one said anything to him in spite of the fact that our menus said that mobiles were banned.

Dinner was penne arrabiata for me (£12.95), a large but over-chillied serving, and poached salmon salad (£13.50) for my husband, who pronounced it excellent. A bottle of sauvignon blanc, at £22.50, was good and well-chilled.

Replete and happy, we repaired to our shoe box bedroom at 11pm to find that a note had been slipped under the door in our absence, giving us “advance notice” that a wedding was taking place in the hotel and that we should expect noise until 12.30am. Nothing had been mentioned when we booked a week earlier, nothing was said when we checked in. Our room was above the revelry and because they couldn’t smoke indoors, several bridesmaids were standing under our window, smoking, telling raunchy stories and cackling loudly. We rang reception twice to no avail. It carried on until 1am, when the heavens opened and they went back inside.

I complained the next morning, and the manager, the splendidly named and very polite Gaius Wyncoll, called me a few days later, apologised profusely and offered a free night’s B&B. Gaius explained that he was new, and that change was under way, so the best of luck to him. Give him a few months and let’s hope he pulls it off.



Bottom line: £185 for a “classic” B&B double.

Sampling the fare: Brasserie dinner around £30, excluding wine.

What we think: Room for improvement.

Best thing: The setting.

Worst thing: Our room.

Access all areas: Yes.

Need to know: The Compleat Angler (0870 4008100, www.macdonaldhotels.co.uk), Marlow, Bucks.

Room: 3 out of 10.

Food: 7 out of 10.

Service: 6 out of 10.