Wednesday
Why risk rain on a European city break when you could be in Fez, which can be a toasty 25C even in October? This walled imperial city of emerald minarets, donkeys and hand-woven carpets is just a three-hour flight from Britain. There is only one sensible way to get there, however: with Ryanair, from Stansted, on a Wednesday or a Sunday. The upside: this Big Weekend has to be a long one.
Morocco isn’t Saudi Arabia, but give a thought to what you wear. Covering both knees and shoulders is good form, especially for women, and low-cut tops should be avoided. Pack trainers, not sandals, or you run the risk of getting something nasty from the medina floor stuck between your toes.
The medina, or old town, has two main thoroughfares, Talaa Kebira and Talaa Sghira — both of which end up at the Blue Gate (Bab Boujloud), the main entrance. Stick to wandering along these on your first day, as there’s more than enough to take in: stalls buried under mountains of rainbow slippers, carpets, oranges, piles of medjool dates, slabs of meat and live chickens. Hopefully you’re staying in a riad — a traditional house with a courtyard in the middle — and hopefully it has a rooftop terrace. Dine in tonight. Soak up the last rays of sunshine, listen to the call to prayer and let it all sink in.
Thursday
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Morning
Start with a guided tour, which isn’t a cop-out: maps of the medina look like a bowl of noodles and are about as much use. Half-day private tours cost about £80 (book through your riad or operator) and will whizz you between the world’s oldest university, Qarawiyyin, founded in 859; Fez Mellah, the old Jewish quarter; and the carved courtyard of Bou Inania, a madrasah (Koranic school) that doubles up as a mosque with limited access for non-Muslims (entry 80p).
Afternoon
Ask to be dropped off for lunch at the Berrada Family Restaurant, near Qarawiyyin. There’s no menu. Instead, the owner, who looks a little like Uncle Albert from Only Fools and Horses, will drag you into the tiny kitchen to try spoonfuls of whatever’s cooking that day, maybe meatballs or lemon chicken tagine (lunch from £4; 00 212 662 348819).
Plenty of grinning locals will offer to show you the way to the Chouara tannery, and now’s as good a time as any to succumb. It isn’t difficult to find, but if you do enlist an escort, make sure you have a 10-dirham coin (80p) in your pocket to thank them with. You’ll be given a sprig of mint to hold under your nose, but the stench of pigeon poop — a natural leather softener — really isn’t that bad. The multicoloured vats look like an artist’s box of paints. There are piles of bags, pouffes and jackets to browse afterwards: reckon on £7 for a pair of slippers. If you pay any less, they’re unlikely to be hand-dyed, stitched or even real leather.
Evening
A meal amid the mosaics at La Maison Bleue isn’t cheap, considering you can eat for a few pounds elsewhere, but the riad has arguably the best restaurant in town — the cook has been turning out crisp chicken pastillas and slow-cooked beef tagines for more than 30 years (mains from £14; maisonbleue.com).
Friday
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Friday is a holy day round these parts and most of the souk will be shut. So get out of town. Your riad can help with an excursion to the ruined Roman city of Volubilis, a two-hour drive away. Its mosaics from the 1st and 2nd centuries AD, and the curved seats of the solarium, are well preserved. A few miles away is the sacred town of Moulay Idriss, founded in the 8th century by Morocco’s first Islamic ruler. On your way back, call at Meknes, another of the country’s four imperial cities. (Marrakesh and Rabat are the other two.) Again, it will be quiet on a Friday.
Book a serious scrub-down in your riad’s hammam for your return (usually about £30), then meet Fouad at reception. The owner of the traditional Dar Hatim restaurant will pick you up, show you to your table and keep checking that you’re having a nice time as you tuck into lamb under his hand-painted ceiling (three courses from £10; 00 212 535 637836).
Saturday
Morning
Start the day with a date milkshake and a close-up of Bou Inania’s gorgeously tiled minaret from the roof terrace of Cafe Clock, a restaurant-cum-cultural hang-out owned by Mike Richardson, a former maître d’ at the Wolseley, in London (cafeclock.com). Wander past the geraniums and around the lake in the peaceful Jnan Sbil gardens, just outside the Blue Gate, then stop for lunch at Chez Rachid, one of the open-fronted little cafes in the shadow of the gate. It’s just chicken and chips, but there’s excellent people-watching and you won’t pay more than £4, tea included.
Afternoon If you really want to find something — restaurants, a particular shop — call ahead from your riad and someone will be sent to pick you up. This will be necessary if you want to purchase the ultimate souvenir: a handmade rug from the Palais Quaraouiyine, a grand 14th-century mansion behind an inconspicuous door. You’ll find only the finest, naturally dyed specimens here, and they don’t come cheap: depending on the style, reckon on at least £500 for a mid-size rug (00 212 535 638939). Cheaper and easier to find is Coin Berbère, on Talaa Kebira (00 212 535 636946). Both shops specialise in friendly mint-tea service and minimal pressure — though, as with everything in Fez, haggling is expected. Aim for half the price you’re first quoted.
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Evening
The best sunset view of the city is from the ruined Merenid Tombs, a 15-minute climb from the northwestern edge of the medina, but if you want a beer with it, hit the rooftop terrace at fancy Riad Fes. The hills turn red and the call to prayer reverberates from the city walls. It’s special, which is why that cool Casablanca lager costs £5 (riadfes.com).
For your last night, if you’re tired of tagines, try the unexpectedly fancy savoury jellies and reductions on offer at Nur — its chef, Najat Kaanache, trained at the French Laundry, in California, and El Bulli, in Spain (five courses from £44; nur.ma).
Sunday
Your flight back to Stansted departs criminally early. Ryanair is sorry about that.
Getting there
Fly to Fez with Ryanair; from £50 return.
Where to stay
Karawan Riad has seven spacious suites, a bargain spa and a plant-filled rooftop (doubles from £159, B&B; karawanriad.com). Traditionalists should book Riad Maison Bleue for its mosaics and hammam (doubles from £154, B&B; maisonbleue.com). Ryad Mabrouka has pretty rooms and a dinky pool (doubles from £82, B&B; ryadmabrouka.com).
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Package
Laura Goulden was a guest of Fleewinter. Four nights in a riad start at £425pp, including flights, transfers, a half-day walking tour and a day trip to Volubilis and Meknes (020 7112 0019, fleewinter.com).