“I NEEDED a drink, I needed a lot of life insurance, I needed a vacation, I needed a home in the country. What I had was a coat, a hat and a gun. I put them on and left the room.”
— Raymond Chandler, Farewell, My Lovely
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NEWCASTLE UNITED’S SEASON already has the feel of a hard-boiled thriller and Sir Bobby Robson wears the furrowed expression of a weary man in a dishonest world, striving for something that might be the truth. Whenever life seems at its most labyrinthine, he can expect to look up and see a man pointing a pistol at his chest. This is football’s version of Trouble Is My Business or, more poignantly, The Long Goodbye .
Two games into his final year as the Newcastle manager and Robson finds himself lost in a plot so dense that Chandler would have tossed the manuscript away and made a stab at romantic comedy. Shady politics in high places, unsolvable mysteries, explosive characters, false leads, blind corners, dead ends; the only thing lacking is a dame in a red dress. And Sven- Göran Eriksson was present on Saturday, so you never know.
Robson was also quoting literature after Tottenham Hotspur had sneaked out of St James’ Park with three points that they warranted only because Newcastle presented no convincing alternative and, in this instance, it was Catch-22. How can he accommodate Patrick Kluivert, who is patently unfit and needs matches, when he has Alan Shearer, Craig Bellamy and Shola Ameobi for competition? Yet he might have been speaking about the entire club. On Gallowgate, it is seldom that any action comes without repercussions, but it can never have been more concentrated than over the past 12 months. “You don’t get breathing space at Newcastle,” Bellamy said. He also called the city a “goldfish bowl”, albeit sporting the satisfied look of a player at the top of his game, standing serene at the centre of a whirlwind.
It is not quite chaos, because everything is connected. Robson’s authority has been undermined by the chairman’s disclosure that his one-year contract will not be renewed; Kieron Dyer tested that authority by refusing to play at outside right against Middlesbrough, snubbed the captain’s armband, apologised unwillingly and must reap the consequences; Shearer, raging against looming retirement, tests it in a different way.
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It goes on, remorselessly. Kluivert is not a sustainable substitute; Liverpool have followed Blackburn Rovers and Celtic by inquiring about Shearer’s status; an outbreak of conjunctivitis has ripped through the club; against Robson’s preference, Jonathan Woodgate was sold to Real Madrid and now a replacement must be found — an offer of £3 million has been tabled for Calum Davenport, of Coventry City.
“There’s a gap that needs filling and the chairman has to go out and spend some money, because we will be light in that department if we don’t,” Shay Given, the goalkeeper, said. “We need to bring someone good in.”
Victory against Spurs would have lessened the intrigue but, after a productive first half in which Bellamy, Jermaine Jenas and Aaron Hughes excelled, impetus fell away. Instead, memories centred on a triple substitution, four strikers thrashing about, Bellamy on the right, Ameobi on the left, Dyer — whose reception was mixed — in the middle, scowls all around and Stephen Carr directing a forthright gesture at Tottenham supporters.
There were some telling comments. “We have a great crowd but when things turn they’ll really let you know about it,” Bellamy said. “That’s when you need strong characters and strong players and one or two weren’t like that. One or two hid a little bit and you can’t do that.” Back in the dressing-room, Given said: “A few of the lads got their views out.”
Wednesday’s match at home to sprightly Norwich City cannot follow a similar pattern and Freddy Shepherd would do well to act on his statement that Newcastle supporters would be “pleasantly surprised” by imminent activity in the transfer market. Incidentally, links with Wayne Rooney may sound implausible but Shepherd’s bond with Paul Stretford, the forward’s representative, could not be tighter.
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Jacques Santini is presiding over a team in transition, but Spurs possess a positive spirit, typified by Paul Robinson’s excellence, the good fortune of Thimothee Atouba’s curling goal, scored in the 51st minute, and stout defending. They were lucky here, but not without merit. Somehow — Tyneside could never be a setting for The Big Sleep — they sent Newcastle into torpor.