MY SON, 2, SHOWS LITTLE INTEREST IN USING A SPOON IN EATING. HOW DO I ENCOURAGE HIM?
YOUR SON is young, and many 2-year-olds don’t use spoons effectively. Do you eat with him? Children often learn best by imitation, so it might help if you join him in a meal of soup and yoghurt and he sees you using a spoon. Is he happy feeding himself finger foods? These are a great way to start building your son’s confidence in feeding. Bear in mind that children can be put off if they detect that a parent doesn’t like the mess that self-feeding produces. Do you find yourself wiping his face repeatedly during meals? It might be less stressful for him to allow him make a mess of himself and the table, and clean him up at the end of the meal.
Caroline Quinton Smith
www.parentingcafe.co.uk
You shouldn’t worry about it too much. He will start feeding himself in his own time. There is little point hurrying him if he is simply not ready to do this. The best way to encourage him would be to tell him that spoon feeding is the way of grown-up boys.
Professor Joan Freeman,
developmental psychologist
Advertisement
The important thing is to try to maintain your patience. If the child detects your anxiety this will only make the situation worse. Try to encourage him to become self-sufficient in other areas and that will generalise into the feeding. Look for chances to praise him. Remove any mealtime distractions such as TV. Mum or Dad should prepare the food then try to show him that feeding himself, rather than indulging in any other activity, is what is expected. At 2, children are looking for opportunities to become self-sufficient, but how quickly this happens will differ greatly between children. Try to point out in his terms the advantages of independence.
Dr Mike Boulton,
child psychologist
My younger son used to manage with what I called a scoop-and-slurp technique: spoon in one hand, the other used to collect food and transfer to his mouth. It didn’t matter what it was, very little was spilt. He gradually learnt that a spoon was also useful, and he became adept, but I never bothered to attempt to teach him. Much food can be supplied in small chunks, and the attraction of yoghurt or ice cream or other similarly pleasant food will encourage your son to experiment with a spoon in time. He will also copy the example of older siblings or parents in due course; until then, let him get on with it.
Althea A. Stevens,
Newquay, Cornwall
Advertisement
NEXT WEEK: I have a 6-year-old, who from a baby has sucked his thumb. Are there any techniques to stop it?
SEND US YOUR PROBLEMS
EVERY WEEK Times readers are invited to submit problems and suggest solutions to a parenting problem and to offer advice, preferably based on their own experiences.
Contact the feature by email via parent.forum@thetimes.co.uk or by post at parent.forum, Features Department, The Times, 1 Pennington Street, London E98 1TF.
Advertisement
Please include your name, address and daytime phone number (not for publication).