Seeing as it’s Wednesday and fashion day on this great newspaper, I don’t suppose regular readers will have much trouble identifying the following as leading designers: Tory Burch, Marc Jacobs, Derek Lam, Narciso Rodriguez, Thakoon Panichgul, Diane von Fürstenberg, Vera Wang and Jason Wu.
This is not me trying to show off or be glamorous; it is merely a few of the stellar fashion names who have contributed designs to a “runway to win” collection in support of Barak Obama’s re-election campaign.
There are handbags, jewellery, totes, T-shirts, scarves, and even a set of red (“Red-y to Win Red”), white (“Victory White”) and blue (“Bo Blue”, after the Obamas’ Portuguese water spaniel) nail polishes from Richard Blanch of Le Métier de Beauté. All available from the Pres’s own website, barackobama.com.
Talk about raising the stakes. Obama may be struggling politically, but when it comes to merchandising, he’s really nailed it. So much better than the usual bumper stickers and baseball caps that characterise most election campaigns.
Of course, being a Democrat and all-round cool dude, Obama has a distinct advantage over his Republican rivals, who are not known for their ability to cut a sartorial dash. In this respect, the fortunes of the American Right are having to rely on the likes of Rick Santorum, whose signature tank tops (or “sleeveless sweaters”, as the Americans like to call them) received considerable coverage early on in the leadership race.
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Encouraged by the press attention, Santorum’s “people” announced in January that sales of the signature woollen singlets would be forming an exciting and integral part of his campaign merchandising. Sadly, and despite multiple Google alerts, I have yet to get hold of one.
Shame. My poor husband will just have to make do with a $3 Mitt Romney Photo Button and matching yard sign for his birthday (sadly, Newt Gingrich doesn’t seem to have a shop).
Personally, the worst bit of election merchandising I have yet encountered was the ludicrous “wake up to change” Conservative alarm clock from the 2010 general election which, even I as a loyal Tory wife, consigned straight to the bin. It was a most unsatisfactory shade of Toilet Duck blue, with all the classy design features of a McDonald’s Happy Meal toy. It was so rubbishy that not even our daughter, who has a magpie obsession with all things small and plastic, could be bothered with it.
Not only was it junk, it was also a missed opportunity to promote British fashion. Next time the Tories should take a leaf out of Obama’s book, and get Fred Perry to run up a job lot of dark blue polo shirts. Suitable for all smart/casual occasions, whether strolling on a beach in Cornwall or watching a baseball game with the President of the United States. Also so much better than a white cotton shirt for hiding grease stains from that tricky half-time hot dog.
It’s not only Western leaders who could benefit from monetising their signature style. Vladimir Putin, recently returned to power by a grateful (that’s “grateful” as defined by the Cesare Borgia edition of the Oxford English Dictionary, meaning “petrified”) nation could, if he wanted to, corner the market in manly outdoor apparel: the “easy open” checked shirt (designed to maximise the appearance of chest hair), or the “is that a Kalashnikov in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?” jeans, cut to emphasise the wearer’s chromosomal composition.
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Kim Jong Un? Perhaps a range of leisurewear, designed to flatter the larger despot. Or the Robert Mugabe trouser suit, complete with extra deep pockets, lined of course. The possibilities are endless.
Make-up fit for the Queen
Watching the coverage of the Queen at Westminster Hall yesterday, I was struck, again, by her extraordinary complexion. For a woman of 85, she has exceptional skin. Indubitably this has something to do with being a life-long hat wearer (all those brims, shielding the Royal collagen from the effects of the Sun). But it may also be down to her love of a certain skincare brand. In his excellent book, The Queen, Robert Hardman gives us a hint. On a stopover at Singapore airport, “she [the Queen] had a lovely time browsing at the Clarins counter while Prince Philip went off to look at gadgets”. That’s right. Clarins. The Queen is mad about it, and back in 2007, the brand was discreetly granted the Royal Warrant. Clarins won’t reveal exactly what is on her Majesty’s dressing table, but I know that she is an avid user of the Hand and Nail Treatment Cream. My sources must be right, because I see that Clarins is bringing out a limited edition to mark the Diamond Jubilee. The rest remain a mystery. Although, if I had to make a recommendation, the new HydraQuench Intensive Serum Bi-Phase would be an excellent choice. By coincidence (or is it?), it goes on sale just in time for the royal birthday at the end of April.
Entrants are vision to behold
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One doesn’t generally expect an especially high standard from the Eurovision Song Contest, but this year’s competition has taken on a distinctly surreal edge.
There’s our own entry, Engelbert Humperdinck, who by rights should probably be the Romanian entrant (Transylvania, tales of the living dead, etc); then there’s the Russian bid, which is so bizarre that it must surely be a spoof (a group of septuagenarians called Buranovskiye Babushki, whose song, Party For Everybody, is an entirely new genre of geriatro-pop).
And finally, Rambo Amadeus from Montenegro, whose song Euro Neuro is a Borat-style pastiche of donkeys, banknotes and bikini-clad girls.
OK, so we all know that everyone is actively trying to lose so that they don’t have to go to the vast and pointless expense of hosting the thing next year — but couldn’t they be just a tiny bit more subtle about it?