KEN LOACH, son of Nuneaton, is known for not letting the actors he directs see the script until the last minute. Which is when Gez Murphy scored the penalty that earned Nuneaton Borough their FA Cup third-round replay away to Middlesbrough this evening. Little can Murphy have imagined the marketing frenzy that his equaliser would ignite.
Keyrings and coasters (£2.99), wall plaque (£7.99) and even your very own “Nuneaton Borough 1 Middlesbrough 1 FA Cup Third Round” desk clock (£9.99). All emblazoned with the image of Murphy striking the ball from the spot and with it embarrassment and inconvenience into the midriff of the Barclays Premiership club.
OK, so Nuneaton have sold only about four of the clocks, but the limited-edition third-round replica shirts (£50) are popular. The special kit is the result of a five-figure deal with Virgin Money — proud sponsor of the 2005 Crazy Golf World Championships, incidentally. But if you seek bargain gear, Roger Ashby can help. The manager of the Nationwide Conference North team runs a clothing firm.
Ashby went to see Middlesbrough play Manchester City in December and was impressed by the Riverside Stadium. “It’s slightly different to Manor Park,” he said. “It’s got seats.” Nuneaton’s home is basic — so basic that when there was high demand for corporate catering for the Middlesbrough tie, the club had to feed customers at the local golf course.
A solution is coming in the form of a rugby club. Nuneaton RFC play on the edge of town at a ground that is nothing more than a clubhouse, a pitch and a perimeter railing. Next season, Nuneaton hope to ground-share, though no building work has started. The estimated £200,000 earned from the Cup adventure will help to make real those plans, as well as allowing the club to extend their tentacles deeper into the community and make a difference in the long term.
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The town has embraced its team. About 5,000 will make the 350-mile round trip to Teesside, which is remarkable given that the average attendance is roughly 1,000. Middlesbrough’s 7-0 defeat at Highbury boosted belief in this part of Warwickshire, although Ashby pointed out that Saturday was not one of Nuneaton’s finest hour and a halves, either. “They probably saw our result at Redditch as well,” Ashby said. A 3-0 defeat.
When not nestling in the FA’s Soho Square headquarters, the Cup travels the nation and is shown off for the cameras. It is a potent symbol of what the competition means. Like any self-respecting celebrity, the Cup has an entourage. Two guards mark it tightly. One of them, Gary Szoldrowski, said that there have been no thefts. Not since Arsenal beat Manchester United in last year’s final, anyway.
Ashby and Mark Cooper, the Tamworth player-manager, flanked it sitting in Tamworth’s social club. The red decor gives faces a scarlet tint, but the Cup appeared to bask in its own beam of white light. Tamworth and Nuneaton are only 15 miles apart and Burton Albion, who play Manchester United tomorrow, are only a short drive north. “It’s a strange sort of relationship,” Rob Tanner, a local journalist, said. “There ‘s a lot of camaraderie in non-league football between supporters and clubs. Although they get on very well, there is that rivalry. Tamworth-Nuneaton is like Birmingham-Villa, but since Tamworth got into the Conference, Burton have been their big rivals.”
Home advantage and a difference of three divisions, rather than the five between Nuneaton and Middlesbrough, suggest that Tamworth are the likelier shock-mongers tonight. Still, if Stoke City’s players lose, they can expect to be in hot water. Or possibly not, if the heating system for the showers is playing up. “Sometimes they work, sometimes they don’t,” Cooper said, as granite clouds sprayed the town with water. He was concerned, though. The pitch looks virtually playable. “I hope it gets even wetter,” he said. “I’m going to do the biggest rain dance you’ve ever seen.”
A dodgy surface: a script development that would come as no surprise to anyone starring in tonight’s drama at Tamworth. Facing a Premiership side for the second time and away from home, a Nuneaton victory would be an incredible twist. Whatever happens, it’s going to be bloody exciting, as another famous product of the town, Mary Whitehouse, would not have said.
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PLAY IT AGAIN HOW TONIGHT’S TIES SHOULD PAN OUT
Birmingham v Torquay
St Andrew’s has been the place for more mishaps than Fawlty Towers this season, but the inferiority of the League Two strugglers should tell.
Chester v Cheltenham
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Hard to predict which one of these teams will be most at the races tonight, but a televised tie against Newcastle is a huge carrot.
Leeds v Wigan
A fixture that is a reminder of the two clubs’ wildly contrasting fortunes in recent years, but Leeds will feel optimistic. Television: Live, Sky Sports 1, 7.45pm.
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Middlesbrough v Nuneaton
After the 7-0 defeat by Arsenal, Steve McClaren’s team are more likely to be seven goals to the good.
Reading v West Bromwich
After beating Wigan, the Premiership side may no longer be underdogs against the Championship leaders.
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Tamworth v Stoke
No jokes about a pig of a pitch, please, but the Conference team have knocked out two league clubs and could run their opponents close.
Walsall v Barnsley
Even this hard-to-call glamour tie could not persuade Steve Staunton against giving up the Walsall assistant manager’s job to take over Ireland.