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New heroes please

Who to support at Wimbledon now the British men are out?

At about 1pm yesterday a collective thought fell across a nation. For the first time in a decade, the second week of Wimbledon would start without a British contender — ie Tim Henman — still in the competition. It might be fashionable in some quarters to knock Henman, but he has provided immense value for money. For a brief moment on Saturday it looked as if Andy Murray might take his slot, but that moment passed. Dedicated tennis fans have found themselves all dressed up, with no one to shout or fret for.

So who would be worthy of the honour? The pragmatist would contend that Roger Federer is likely to win, but would one want to encourage that haircut? If not him, then perhaps Andy Roddick, yet would one wish to establish the reversed baseball cap as a fashion item? Lleyton Hewitt has a gruff charm — although whether that is an asset or not is debatable. So let us support Sebastian Gosjean and prove that there are no hard feelings against the French in general, irrespective of Jacques Chirac’s sneaky drop shots.

The problem has for ages been more pronounced on the female side. British women, alas, tend to be eliminated en masse by the end of the first Tuesday. Maria Sharapova is a fine athlete, but should what is charitably described as a “grunt” (in the sense that Tarzan whispered) be rewarded? Besides which, have not the beautiful people already won enough in life without more trophies? The correct approach to adopt, therefore, is to cheer on the aesthetically challenged. Being British, naturally, we would not dream of naming names, but our support will be lavished in inverse proportion to the marketing dollars received by the finalists.