Financial affairs
My husband thinks it is important that we should have a joint bank account. We married quite recently after “going out” for several years. It is lovely and all that, but I am used to being perfectly independent and don’t see why my earnings should merge into his. Surely it’s not the way these days?
JK, Norwich
Leaving aside the old notion of a married couple being “one flesh”, if you are living in the same house, eating the same meals and going on the same holidays, then a joint bank account is surprisingly useful, as well as being a sign of at least some commitment to your union. However, that’s not to say you shouldn’t also maintain your own separate financial arrangements, not least because it means you can buy little surprises for your husband, as well as pursue affairs without him ever finding out.
On the wrong track
After an exciting trip up the west coastline to Glasgow, my boyfriend revealed it is his ambition to have sex on every main rail route in Britain “to begin with”. I quite liked the experience as a spontaneous one-off on a nearly empty train when I was bit tipsy, but the thought of undertaking it as a kind of project fills me with dread. He’s already talking about “popping down to Penzance” next month. Should I indulge him, or put a stop to it now?
HJ, Birmingham
Obviously your boyfriend has some sort of fetish for train travel. Freud, of course, believed that fetishism derived from a man’s unconscious terror of his mother’s genitals, and what better way of conquering that fear than performing the sexual act on a long, hard train pushing through the yielding landscape? You need to realise that he is aroused, not by you, but by the smell of a diesel locomotive and the squeal of its brakes. If you don’t believe me, whisper the phrase “19.00 London Liverpool Street to Norwich” in his ear and see what happens. Your boyfriend is a pervert. Stay on the platform and wave him off.
How do you take it?
I fear I may be acquiring a liking for both green tea and elderflower cordial. Not everybody approves. Should I try to convert them?
RH, London
Advertisement
I hope this is code for some exciting sexual practice, because otherwise you would be too boring for words.
Follow Mrs Mills on Twitter at @MrsMillsST. Send problems to: Mrs Mills, The Sunday Times, 1 London Bridge Street, London SE1 9GF, or mrs.mills@sunday-times.co.uk. No correspondence can be entered into