May 1997 We’ve only been in for ten minutes and Gordon is already throwing his [expletive] toys out of the [expletive] pram. Beating up on Mandelson every other second, mind you, that is [expletive] tempting sometimes. Psychologically flawed? More like a pathological fruitcake. I’ll tell Tony to sack the [expletive] in the morning. If that man ever becomes Prime Minister . . .
September 2000 Full-blown [expletive] fuel crisis and GB’s disappeared again. It’s easier to find petrol in London than the [expletive] Chancellor. If that man ever becomes Prime Minister . . .
March 2001 Budget Day. Except do we know what is in the [expletive] budget? Of course not. Gordon won’t tell us. Once we’ve won the [expletive] election, TB will shove him out to the Foreign Office or better still Ag and [expletive] Fish. We should have poisoned his food at Granita. If that man ever becomes Prime Minister . . .
March 2003 What’s the difference between Saddam Hussein and Gordon Brown? We know which side Saddam’s on in the coming war. Vital [expletive] vote and we’ve no idea whether Gordon is behind us or sending off his band of demented Jocks to stab Tony in the back before a shot is fired in Iran or Iraq or Italy or whichever [expletive] country we are after this time. If that man ever becomes Prime Minister . . .
June 2003 The euro. It’s not happening because it’s failed Gordon’s so-called [expletive] tests. Tests my [expletive]. He’s keeping the pound so he can stick his own [expletive] picture on it. If that man ever becomes Prime Minister . . .
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June 2007 That man is Prime Minister. Where is the [expletive] delete button on this [expletive] computer?