FRUSTRATED by delays at airport immigration? Help could be on the way. A Conservative Party MP has tabled a motion calling for the introduction of traditional tea trolleys, reports The Times (Jan 28). The idea was suggested to Michael Fabricant, MP for Lichfield, by Mark Price, the managing director of Waitrose. “It wouldn’t do the Government any harm to compensate people for the long waits they’re now experiencing at passport controls,” Fabricant says. The pair say tea ladies would be chosen for their cheerfulness.
Council bin inspectors, on the other hand, have been ordered to show “zero tolerance” to home owners who give them trouble, reports The Sun (Feb 1). A manual for the inspectors gives hints on how to tell if a resident is getting angry, such as “the throbbing vein in the temple”. If they are shouted at, inspectors should say: “I am not prepared to carry on this interview whilst you are calling me a w***er and a jobsworth.” Some members of the public have advice for their council, too. The Daily Mirror (Jan 30) says funeral-goers had to get out oftheir limousine and walk after their cortège got stuck on a speed bump. Lancashire County Council has promised an investigation.
But is it an emergency? It might be to some, including the woman who rang 999 because she did not have £1 for a shopping trolley. It wasn’t the only unnecessary emergency call, reports The Daily Telegraph (Feb 1). One woman called because her boyfriend refused to let her watch EastEnders, while another wanted police to arrest her boyfriend because he had put her hamster out in the rain.
Boys can be mischievous at times, which means Bassetts Farm School in Exmouth, Devon, could be in for an adventurous ride. The Daily Express (Jan 31) reports that the 20 pupils in the mixed school’s foundation class are all boys. Christine Jones, the head teacher, says: “Maybe it’s something in the local water.”