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Loch Ness spell

THE Loch Ness Monster has been spotted so few times over the past year that locals are hoping sorcery might tempt Nessie to the surface once again. A high priest of the British Coven of White Witches has cast a spell on the loch to encourage the “monster” to come to the surface more often. Last year there were four sightings, compared with 12 in each of the previous four years.

Kevin Carlyon, the high priest, says he hopes the spell will bring “health and happiness” to those who see the legendary beast. “I believe that Nessie is a spirit and that I can summon something up. When we went out on the loch on a previous visit, I threw a stone in as a lucky talisman. Just for a couple of minutes, everybody in the boat absolutely froze and a shiver went down their spines. I’m confident Nessie will make more appearances this year now.”

Gary Campbell, Loch Ness Monster Fan Club president, said: “We could really do with Nessie making more appearances for the tourists.”