Fashion news!
I know — Hedi Slimane is taking charge of creative direction at Céline!
Not that. More exciting.
Oh, hmm. Phoebe Philo of Céline has finally been confirmed at Burberry?
No. That’s all rumours. For now. More exciting!
Go on.
Ready? Karl Lagerfeld has a beard.
What. Really? Is that it?
You sound surprised.
I had hoped for more. I don’t know why.
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Rude.
Sorry. But it is surprising all the same. What manner of beard is it — a bit of stubble, or full Hagrid?
I have to say it errs more on the side of Hagrid. Or rather, Father Christmas, since it’s grey. But it is more neatly trimmed than Santa’s, obviously.
Interesting. Last time I checked facial hair was not, er, de rigueur in the fashion world.
I think that’s just because most male models haven’t hit puberty yet.
Fair point. So is it possible he’s embracing getting *whispers* older?
Lagerfeld? The creative head of Chanel, Fendi and his own label? Older? Pah. The opposite.
What do you mean?
Well why, after two decades — yes, two — of the same look, would he choose to make a change now?
I don’t know. I’ve only been alive for just over two decades.
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Oh, do shut up. OK then — how many twentysomething males have you seen without a beard recently?
Ahh. With you. So it is, in fact, a fashion thing?
So long as fashion is obsessed with youth, I’d say yes.
I do have another theory if you’ll have it.
Which is?
He could be preparing for retirement — as a Shoreditch barista.
Let’s hope not.