Ah, “erection”. Let’s see it up please, Carol.
I don’t normally do requests, unless I’m asked to.
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A man walks into the doctor’s. He has a carrot hanging out of his mouth, a bit of cabbage up his nose and gravy all over his face. The doctor says: “I know what your problem is. You aren’t eating properly.”
If a short fortune-teller escaped from prison, would there be a small medium at large?
Two men are dying of thirst in a desert. They come across a stall. They ask for water. “I’m sorry, we only sell jelly,” says the stall owner. The two men trudge on and see another stall. They again ask for water. “I’m sorry, we only sell hundreds and thousands.” The two men leave and one says to the other: “Do you think this is a trifle strange?”
Sixty nine and sixty nine, that’s an interesting position. Let’s see what happens next!
Do dance studios have waltz-to-waltz carpets?
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A Russian man and his wife are walking along a road. All of a sudden something drips on the man. “That’s got to be rain,” says the man. “No, dear,” replies his wife. “It’s definitely snow.” The couple decide to ask Rudolph the Communist, as he knows what is going on. “It’s raining,” confirms Rudolph. The woman tries to say that it is definitely snowing but her husband replies: “Rudolph the red knows rain, dear. ”
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Did the inventor of the doorknocker win the no-bell prize?
Take four from the top, Carol, and four from the bottom . . . Oh . . . “Dirty wheelchair!” Ha ha.
A scientist clones himself. The clone is very rude and cheeky, but the scientist is kind and gentle. One day the scientist shoves the clone off a building. He was swiftly arrested by police for making an obscene clone fall.