Incredibly, some people don’t understand why what you wear on The March merits any thought. Confusing sincerity with lack-lustre standards of personal grooming is never sensible – what you wear always matters, particularly on a march. A) Marches are now the thinking person’s alternative to Royal Ascot. Less muddy than Glastonbury, more leisurely than speed-dating, they’re becoming an integral part of the Season. All year round. B) You will be in the company for several hours of some of the more judgmental, questioning people on Earth. C) It’s time finally to put paid to the idea that a fondness for nice clothes indicates a shallow nature. Miuccia Prada attended communist rallies dressed in YSL and never got flak for it, even though this was the Seventies, a decade when most of Britain believed that a cheesecloth tent and a tank top could take you anywhere.
It’s time we accepted that these days, unless, like Bob Geldof, you’re a master of Neanderthal chic, even unadulterated goodness requires a bit of glossy presentation. Good walking shoes are essential. Chic metallic flip-flops are not a good idea – flat can be agony on cobbles. Steer clear of open-toed sandals as your toes could get pulverised.
Jeans and trainers are the most practical option, except in extreme heat (not usually a problem in Edinburgh). Layers are de rigueur: the short-sleeved T-shirt over long-sleeved T, with maybe a V-neck sweater over the top has the right kind of earnest studenty vibe (cashmere’s good because it’s lightweight but warm and only other cashmere wearers will spot that it’s cashmere, which hardly puts them in a position to call you a rich, patronising parasite). If Chris Martin is not your idea of a fashionista, any of this season’s kaftans are just dandy. A rucksack or lightweight satchel bag that straps across your body is essential (Belstaff’s canvas biker-style bag is perfect; this is not, repeat not, the place to show off your Chloé Paddington). Pack a rain hat that doubles as a sunhat (Orla Kiely’s are just the ticket, £44; 020-7585 3322); wet wipes, sun cream (you never know), water and a nylon mac that rolls into a ball (Stella McCartney’s unlined nylon trench is beyond ideal. If not, try Barbour’s new super-light nylon macs, from £99; 0800 009988), some This Works aromatherapy Muscle Therapy, £15, 0845 2300499 (look, it’s not meant to be an endurance test) and you’re set. Or almost.
Whatever you wear should pass the ethical test. That rules out fakes (could be funding bombs or drugs), fur and sweatshops. Unfortunately, at the moment, it also rules out the Make Poverty History wrist bands. What it rules in is careful shopping. No Sweat Sneakers from ethical.wares.com are Converse-inspired, but vegan, made in Indonesia, and come with details of the wages and conditions experienced by the workers who made them. Other ethical brands worth looking at are Edun (Fairtrade, stylish clothes including jeans, made in Africa, sold in Selfridges; www.edun.ie), Kuyichi (for organic cotton jeans and T-shirts; www.kuyichi.com); Enamore.co.uk for decorative hemp skirts; www.ptree.com and the Traid shops for recycled clothing at rock-bottom prices. For details of other products with a clean conscience, see living ethically.co.uk or Ethical Consumer magazine (0161-226 2929).