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Going up . . .

SHOPPING
Don’t stop. It’s good for the economy and good for your wardrobe

STRETCH JERSEY
The modern Lycra — with generous give and slinky swishiness. So becoming

BEN WATT’S BUZZIN’ FLY
Burning up dancefloors. We’ve said it before — choon!

‘FREE KATIE’ T-SHIRTS
The Holmes/Cruise saga continues. Help her!

And going down . . .

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TOO MUCH CATH KIDSTON
Beware death by quaint winter rose and polka dot

MOBILE PHONE VIRUSES
No ... please ... no ...

GLASTONBURY BORES
Hooray — it’s the last day. Now they’ll shut up about it

JADE JAGGER FOR PACHA
New DJ compilation features Groove Armada, Outkast and Blur. Zzzz

SUPASWEET ONIONS
Can be eaten like an apple. Nice thought. Bad breath