★☆☆☆☆
Chris Hemsworth and 11 other macho beefcakes star in the true and, finally, declassified story (well, actually, it has been declassified since November 2001, but anyway) of how a dozen US army special forces action men, in the space of barely a month, killed most of the Taliban, captured their stronghold of Mazar-e-Sharif and basically made the world safe from terrorism for ever.
Yes, it’s intense jingoistic nonsense and full of hilarious caricatures — watch out for US enemy No 1, the evil Arab Mullah Razzan, played by Numan Acar in deadpan homage to Aladdin’s cartoon nemesis Jafar.
Hemsworth plays the straightest action himbo since John Wayne in 1968’s The Green Berets (that dim-witted propaganda was to the Vietnam War what 12 Strong is to the war in Afghanistan). Here, as loveable but firm Captain Mitch Nelson, Hemsworth machineguns, from horseback, seemingly half of the country’s male population (all bad guys who deserved it) while barking out hysterical bilge such as: “If we don’t take that city the whole country will turn into a goddam terrorist training camp!” Yeah! You take that city, Chris! You shoot those scumbags!
The film was co-written by The Silence of the Lambs scribe Ted Tally, which was a surprise. It was produced by Pearl Harbor’s Jerry Bruckheimer, which wasn’t.
15, 130min