Last Christmas, a girlfriend and I took a road trip to the home counties, where we were wildly inappropriate guests at a charity ball. In a white silk MC Hammer-style jumpsuit and no make-up or jewels, I was a miserable outsider among the bouffed-and-boosted skinny LBD ladies and the puffy, ball-gowned do-gooder matrons. All night, we struggled vainly to fit in, until a fabulously cheesy band played the best kind of diabolical covers. Out there on the marquee dancefloor, we belonged, we grooved and laughed. The oldies became our friends. Only with dancing could this alien event have been fun. With ass-shaking, a bad night became a top night.
Whether it's cutting-edge reggaeton, trumpety big band stuff, or one drum in the African bush you dance to, moving to music always makes you feel good. Beyond the endorphin high of regular exercise, or the spiritual, "I am a tree" serenity of yoga, dancing creates a magic sparkle inside and out. Teetering towards the craggy, saggy cliffs of middle age, I have been trying to work out what it is that keeps us from becoming decrepit, boring and conservative. I don't think it's sudoku, and I don't think breast enlargements, stretching your face, freezing your eyebrows or downsizing your brain helps, either. Really, all you've got to do is keep dancing.
For most of us, growing older means dancing less. A concerted effort is required - even if the dancing is just letting go in front of toddlers, with an iPod at the bus stop or swinging your pants in the bedroom mirror. The committed will dance everywhere, any way, because it's fun. It is also social and, by its nature, expressive - something we all get worse at the older we get. At Pineapple Dance Studios, the oldest customer is an eightysomething man; at Danceworks, it's an 84-year-old woman.
Maria Kastani, one half of the fashion label Issa, dances, "for fun, at studios in Covent Garden, at my gym, which has different dance classes every week, and when I go out. You can hide your feelings in dancing and take yourself to a different state". Kastani was in charge of the membership at Momo's Kemia Bar until 2002, and often led the dancing in the little basement bar, where, even early in the week, it was jumping-room only. Swivel-hipped Lebanese girls with seductive, snake-like rhythm danced alongside European aristocrats who had more kerplunk than funk. Dancing brings people together. It's a true leveller.
Sofia Boutella, the Algerian dancer photographed here, who featured in Madonna's Hung Up video, says: "All of us are dancers. Madonna brought together dancers with different styles, different cultures, all of them really talented. When she dances with you, she is just like the rest of us." Which could so easily be showbizzy bunkum if it weren't for the fact that my mate Amy, a psychiatric nurse, danced with Madonna at the after-party for her Confessions showcase.
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The truth is, dancing doesn't have a downside. Considering it's a way of getting fit, socialising, improving muscle memory and co-ordination and motor skills, as well as having fun, it's a wonder that we don't dance all the time. Plus, dance is hot right now. There are three films in production about the reggaeton dance scene alone, documentary films such as Rize and Mad Hot Ballroom win festival prizes, and there's enough telly to inspire young punks and grannies alike.
Nike, spotting that interest, has sunk a lot of cash into its new dance range. Boutella stars in a big-budget ad campaign, and Madonna's choreographer, Jamie King, has devised the Nike Rockstar workout, a slickly choreographed fitness class that brings Missy Elliott-style swagger to nine-to-fivers doing their after-hours workout at Holmes Place. Nike's dancewear range is good enough to be seen in outside the studio, and items such as the super-low-slung baggy pants and boned corset incorporate the same technical know-how as its football and athletic kits. At least it is putting women first.
Courtesy of her Hung Up video, Madonna has now made the girlie wrapover cardie, leotard and flesh-tone fishnets wardrobe must-haves, and dance shops such as the one at Pineapple Studios report more and more calls asking for ballet wraps and legwarmers. A thin cashmere ballet dancer's wrap is also the cult item in the new Rykiel Karma Body & Soul range of dance and workout wear. As Nathalie Rykiel, the collection's designer, puts it: "I had comfort and glamour on my mind and I don't see why these two concepts can't work together. A woman can feel and look great. Dance is about a woman taking time for herself, it's not about seducing anyone." Nike says the same thing. "The range is designed to empower women to feel comfortable and sexy so that they dance well."
The trendsetting boutique, Colette, on the Rue Saint-Honoré in Paris, is throwing classes for its customers in dance styles as varied as old-school swing and the cutting-edge, theatrical street moves of krumping. Being able to dance, if only a little bit, is an accessory we can all afford. And dancing will always be far sexier than any £1,000 handbag.