The words of Adlai Stevenson, the United States' man at the United Nations Security Council on the famous occasion of the Cuban missile crisis, are starting to ring in the minds of those awaiting Tony Mowbray's unveiling as the new Celtic manager. “I am prepared to wait until hell freezes over for an answer,” Stevenson told the dissembling Russian delegation on the existence of illegal missiles.
It is now nearly three weeks since Gordon Strachan left Celtic and the events since are starting to reflect badly on the club. Due diligence, yes, is one thing, but what is this stand-off with West Bromwich Albion all about? It seems that Celtic, who prize Mowbray very highly, still want to pay a moderate fee to West Brom for luring him away.
Peter Lawwell, the Celtic chief executive, is a likeable bloke who has served Celtic well over the years, but it is to be severely hoped for his sake that, even now, it is merely a question of when - not if - Mowbray is unveiled at Celtic Park. If the 45-year-old West Brom manager is not to be Celtic's new boss, there will be some excruciating explaining to be done by Lawwell.
Celtic are believed to have held a board meeting yesterday, during which Lawwell presumably outlined the Mowbray saga to his fellow directors. Despite the age that it seems to have taken for this deal to be concluded, Lawwell, apparently, is quite sanguine about it all. The Celtic chief executive is said to be in no doubt at all that Mowbray will be Strachan's successor.
In which case, why is it proving to be such an agonised saga? Celtic began pursuing Mowbray 12 days ago and he still isn't in Glasgow. Is he locked up in a cage somewhere in the West Midlands?
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The reasons are said to be purely fiscal. Celtic want to pay no more than around £1.3million for Mowbray and his two assistants, Peter Grant and Mark Venus, while West Brom want around £1million more than that. Jeremy Peace, the West Brom chairman, has dug his heels in over the issue, yet so have Lawwell and Celtic in return. The upshot is this prolonged, tedious, utterly stagnant vigil for Mowbray.
The saga is all the more peculiar given that Celtic had known for some months that Strachan would be leaving. These things are never easy, but the club did have breathing space in which to snoop around and speak to people such as Mowbray or anyone else while laying plans for a fresh start. The truth is that Peace at the Hawthorns is proving exactly what he promised to be to Cetlic - an obstinate and resilient character who refuses to be trampled upon by the bigger Scottish club.
Celtic want to have their cake and eat it. The club really admires Mowbray and rates him extremely highly. But Lawwell doesn't want those sentiments reflected in the cheque he has to write out.