Journalists in glasshouses shouldn’t throw stones, but we can’t resist chucking one at the Daily Maily for its misquotation of Mary O’Rourke last week. In a tribute to her late nephew, Brian Lenihan, O’Rourke said that, like Wolfe Tone, he stood for “Catholic, Protestant and the Centre”. Er, Catholic, Protestant and Dissenter, more like it. And given that Mammy has been a regular at Bodenstown, we very much doubt the error was hers.
Then Jackie Healy-Rae was quoted in the Irish Independent as saying he had “no clue in the wild empty world” who had used the phone in his office to vote for his son Michael 3,636 times. We always thought the Healy-Rae signature phrase was “in the wide, earthly world”. Of course we could always ring him to find out . . .
For howler of the week, though, we return to the Mail, who rather spoiled their Healy-Rae exclusive with this clanger: it described Mickey Joe Harte as “the father of murdered Michaela Harte”. In fact, the Lifford crooner was Ireland’s entry in the 2003 Eurovision Song Contest.
Martin pushes the envelope with his communications
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Karl Martin, the office manager in the Moriarty tribunal, is a card. Or so his letters to the Department of An Taoiseach would indicate. Last January, Martin sent it a cheque for €100 towards the cost of his state-provided mobile phone.
“Given the state of the national finances, I have taken to contributing towards the cost of providing me with this official phone,” wrote Martin. “However, this action should not be construed as acceptance of any liability or blame on my part for the current state of the economy as I have [not been working] in the Department of Finance since 1996. On my departure at that time, everything appeared to be in order.” Which is Bertie Ahern’s excuse, too.
In another email, Martin suggested a meeting on December 9. “I note this is Eid al-Adha day of sacrifice,” he quipped. “If you have any religious or other reason that makes the 9th unsuitable, we would be happy to reschedule.” A man with too much time on his hands?
Publisher’s output is increasingly juvenilia
Gill & Macmillan is hoping lightning strikes twice. It’s decided to attempt a follow-up to the astonishing success of Soundings, the anthology of Leaving Certificate poetry which was last Christmas’s bestseller.
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This year it’s releasing Exploring English 1 — Short Stories We Did For Our Inter Cert. Also edited by Augustine Martin, it includes stories by Mary Lavin, Frank O’Connor and Brendan Behan. Can a schoolbook last used in 1991 hit the jackpot again? After all, nostalgia ain’t what it used to be.
G&M’s line-up of politics books is more current. Bertie:
Power & Money is coming from Colm Keena of The Irish Times.
The unexpected combination of Bruce Arnold and Jason O’Toole is writing The End of the Party — How Fianna Fail Lost its Grip on Power. In a similar vein will be A History of Fianna Fail (a provisional title) from Noel Whelan, the political commentator.
Pat Kenny’s home village is going to the dogs
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This month’s Dalkey Community Council newsletter has a letter from a resident complaining he has to keep his head down while walking in the village in order to avoid dog poo.
Brendan Flood writes: “I can recall a recent occasion being almost knocked through a shop window by a pair of enthusiastic, leashed dogs, whose famous Media Master failed to control them in the same way as he does his audience. My fault; I failed to see them coming.” An issue for Pat Kenny, RTE’s Frontline host, perhaps?
Remember how Bertie Ahern used to apply make-up with a trowel when he was taoiseach? So we asked the Department of An Taoiseach how much Enda Kenny has spent on slap since March. Not a cent, they tell us.
Gay Mitchell’s pitch to Fine Gael is that only he can secure the Dublin vote in the presidential election. Not so, says Pat Cox’s camp. Sure wasn’t Alan Brogan, the top Dublin footballer, at Cox’s launch in the Mansion House two weeks ago?
Chris de Burgh’s relationship with journalists is that of the dog to the lamp-post, so it’s fascinating to discover the crooner has dabbled himself.
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An obituary in the Daily Telegraph of David Welch, a former sports editor, recounts that his staff had mixed feelings about the introduction of “star” columnists. “One article on Formula One by the singer Chris de Burgh was considered totally unsalvageable,” said the obituary.
“Welch happened to be on holiday, however, so his staff were left with the unenviable choice of printing it as it stood, or spiking it. Neither seemed likely to delight the boss on his return.”
A search on the Telegraph database suggests de Burgh was put on the spike. It’s a wonder he didn’t sue them.
Grass roots
Connie Cronin thought he was hallucinating when he spotted a massive mushroom growing in a field at the family farm just outside Kiskeam. Weighing in excess of 4.5kg the mega mushroom, if edible, would make a substantial breakfast for at least 20 men with hearty appetites heading out for a day cutting silage.
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— The Corkman
Residents in Gracedieu were horrified when green leafy trees lining their streets were hacked on one side. The side facing onto the road was cut close to the bark, in a fashion that left residents wondering if they had been vandalised. However, the drastic trimming was the work of Waterford city council which said it was related to safety of buses.
— Waterford News & Star
A woman who had differences with an organiser of a charity event contacted a radio station claiming it had been called off. On discovering it was a hoax call, the station clarified the situation within 10 minutes and the event went ahead. Elizabeth Keaveney, from Glenamaddy, appeared before Tuam district court for making the call on June 15. Her solicitor said it was “a moment of madness”.
— Connacht Tribune