Nearly a third of Gen Z women now identify as queer, but the new Max dramedy Am I OK? documents a different phenomenon that has basically consumed my own friend circles: In their thirties and beyond, many women are discovering that they are, in fact, not straight. Such is the case with Dakota Johnson’s Lucy, an Angeleno who discovers later in life that she’s a lesbian — but only after Googling “Am I a lesbian?” Fortunately, Lucy has a supportive best friend Jane, played by Sonoya Mizuno, an actress many viewers will recognize from her roles in Alex Garland films, ranging from Ex Machina, where she portrayed an enigmatic dancing android, to Civil War, in which she played an embedded British reporter.
Mizuno’s Jane is the effervescent and effortlessly cool counterpart to Lucy’s bundle of anxiety, but her overeagerness to help her newly out friend ends up causing conflict for the duo. Lucy, still taking her first fumbling stops in the queer community, isn’t ready to kiss girls at bars, whereas Jane is happy to show her how it’s done. At one point, Lucy asks herself the titular question, “Am I OK?” — an anxious bit of self-reflection that has seemingly never entered Jane’s brain. Over the course of diner meals, yoga sessions, and car rides to the airport, the pair grapple with their evolving friendship, trying to understand what it means to remain best friends while Lucy rediscovers — and redefines — who she is.
Directed by real-life couple Tig Notaro and Stephanie Allynne, and written by Lauren Pomerantz based on her own personal story, the film is imbued with authentic detail familiar to anyone who has been on either side of a Lucy-Jane situation. Ahead of the streaming premiere, Mizuno spoke with Them about female friendship, working with Dakota Johnson, and playing someone who’s super cool.
First off, what’s your actual diner order?
I’m the kind of person that changes it up, so it would depend on the day. I mean, I love a burger, but sometimes I go for sweet. I love pancakes and bacon and maple syrup.
Do you feel like you have a lot in common with Jane?
I would definitely not order a salad in a diner, let’s put it that way. [laughs]
Actually, not hugely. I mean, circumstantially there were things that I really understood, because I moved away from England a lot. But in terms of her character, I think we’re quite different. Jane’s very on the front foot, and kind of has a Type A personality, which is actually not really me. So tapping into that was unusual for me.
She also kind of breezes through things. Things are quite easy for Jane, I think. Things kind of work for her, which is amazing. But it also means that because she doesn’t overthink things, she sometimes misses things. I’m probably the opposite of that, to be honest. So it’s quite freeing, playing someone you’re quite different from.
As a lowly writer, I often imagine actors are always as confident and self-assured as the characters they play, but…
Yeah, it’s not the case. I think that’s why it’s so nice to be an actor, because it gives you a safe space to be that person, when otherwise you feel like a shivering wreck or whatever. I’m joking, I’m not that bad, but, you know.
I mean, think you’re still pretty cool! I think Jane just has a different kind of coolness — a more in-your-face coolness.
She does. And it’s a wonderful quality to have that kind of confidence. And a no bullshit-ness that means she gets a lot done.
I wanted to ask whether you brought any formative female friendship experience to the role?
The dynamic of the female friendship was so clear in the writing that I understood it immediately. It wasn’t about my friendships, but it was also about all of my female friendships. So I think that there were definitely elements of my friendships, and also elements of my relationships with my sisters that I felt like I recognized as well.
This is going to be a very weird comparison, but the film reminds me of the Jason Segel movie I Love You, Man in that it has a rom-com structure but it’s about friends breaking up and getting back together.
I think you’re right on the money, because if I remember right, it was brought up as a reference at some point. I think these friendships that are cemented when we’re young are so interesting. Obviously, we evolve and change, and the relationship needs to evolve and change as well. But there’s a bit of push and pull between both sides as to whether that’s possible — if both parties are open to do that or ready to receive that. So it’s an interesting time to look at [the Lucy-Jane relationship]... It’s nearly a 20-year-old friendship.
At that point in a friendship, people often get to a point where they realize, “We might not even become friends at this stage in our life if we met each other now.”
That’s kind of where I relate it to sisterhood. A lot of my really close girlfriends are actually from when I was in my teenage years, and now we’re all so different. But there is something about those young friendships which are very intense and very special that deserve to last. They need taking care of, and that means sometimes they need to be examined.
What was it like working with Dakota? I feel like a lot of people don’t get her humor because she’s so smart and so dry, but she cracks me up. I’m obsessed.
She’s hilarious. She’s brilliantly dry, like you say. And also she’s just a fucking amazing actress, so for me it was just a total pleasure to be working with her. She made it easy. We also had a very natural chemistry, I think. It was partly there because the dialogue was so well-written, but I think it also helped because she’s so great, and it’s easy to bounce off someone who’s great.
The dynamic between Lucy and Jane is fascinating. Sometimes in these situations, the straight friend wonders — even if they never say it out loud — something like, “Why was she never attracted to me?” Were you playing Jane that way at all? Like she wondered why Lucy didn’t have a crush on her?
We definitely talked about that. It wouldn’t be something she would’ve not thought about. These things bring up so many thoughts and questions. But the overriding [reaction] is like, “Well, that’s great. And actually I’m not that surprised.”
What was it like working with Tig Notaro and Stephanie Allyne, who are creative couple goals?
They’re exactly that: creative couple goals. I absolutely adore them. And also, Lauren, the writer. I thought they were brilliant. They were all three of them actually hilarious people, so lots of laughter. And I think [they were] the only people who could have and should have told this story. It was really handled with a lot of care, but also with a lot of humor.
Thinking of Lauren and Stephanie specifically, it seems like a lot of people involved in the production can intuitively understand a certain kind of late-blooming experience.
Yeah, exactly. I hope that’s what this film speaks to, because it is one of a gazillion coming-out stories, and every one of them is as relevant as the next. I think there’s definitely something about this particular period in time, because the generation younger than us are more likely to find this kind of thing easier. I think there’s definitely been a resurgence of women in our generation who have been allowed to accept their sexuality [later in life]; in another time, they might not have come to terms with it.
I definitely laughed, a little painfully, when we saw Lucy googling whether she was a lesbian.
Yeah. I mean, it is funny. But when you’re in it, it’s not funny at all. When you’re in it it’s like, “I cannot believe, I don’t know myself well enough to have this figured out by now.” It’s all in the film: when Lucy has her coming-out scene with Jane, she talks about all the shame that she’s been holding about not knowing herself, and about what other people are going to think. It’s tormenting to feel like that. But when you see it outside of [Lucy], and you see her Googling and all that, it’s funny. But it’s a journey to get to that point where it can be funny.
On a sillier note, how many people would you actually take to the airport?
Do you know what? I’ve taken so many people to the airport. First of all, I’m one of six siblings, so I’d take any of them. And I think this past year I’ve taken three people to the airport. To be honest, I quite like driving people places, so I’m a bendy arm where that’s concerned. I take a lot of people.
What’s the most Angeleno-like yoga/meditation retreat you’ve ever done when you’re in California? Sound baths? Infrared yoga?
I did infrared, like, sweating. Not yoga. You just lie in a sweaty sleeping bag. I used to do that in Larchmont when I lived in LA. And I don’t know, I went to Burning Man? I’m not that way inclined, particularly, to be honest.
Last question. Which is more fun: doing the robot dance with Oscar Isaac or dancing in a gay bar?
Oh my God, that is just impossible. But I’m going to say dancing in a gay bar, because that is what I’m going to say. That’s hard.
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