The Most Longing Lesbian Glances of 2021

Whether you’re an 18^th century painter expressing your forbidden love with the stroke of a brush or a teenager harboring a secret crush on your best friend, we lesbians are known for our glances. We are certified experts in looks of love and lust and longing. Our eyes express all the  unrequited, just requited, and soon-to-be-requited feelings in our hearts. And now our looks are even more laden with meaning because masks occlude most of our faces. The power of our concentrated gazing? Immeasurable!

But while we were all trapped indoors, glued to our screens, this year also delivered a delicious amount of lesbian glances in pop culture to keep us company. To cap off 2021, I’ve curated 10 of my favorite looks from movies, TV, and a handful of celesbians for your enjoyment. And please note that I use the label “lesbian” loosely. This list is comprised of glances from queer women and nonbinary people at queer women and nonbinary people. “Lesbian” has never been exclusive to women who only love women — and besides, this is a list of lesbian glances, not a list of lesbians who glanced.

The best gay news of 2021 was that Elvira, the one and only Mistress of the Dark, has been queer this whole time! She’s been with her partner T Wierson for 19 years!! And in an interview with KCAL-TV about her new book, she gifted us with several hot photos of her and Wierson including one with Wierson shooting her just about the dreamiest glance ever!!! (OK, I have to get a hold of myself now. My editor told me I just used up my entire exclamation mark quota for this article.)

Elvira is out of character as her regular redheaded Cassandra Peterson self — but still mostly dressed in signature black — while Wierson is wearing a loose black T-shirt with her tattooed arms folded to emphasize her biceps, spikey grey hair sticking up in all the right ways. Peterson’s hand is on the back of Wierson’s neck and, as Wierson looks at her, she looks at us as if to say, “Yup, look how hot we are.”

Lauren Hadaway’s remarkable directorial debut about an overly determined novice rower was easily one of the best movies of the year. It is also filled with lesbian glances. The only distraction Alex Dall (a stellar Isabelle Fuhrman) allows herself from rowing is her hot teaching assistant Dani (Dilone). Through their relationship we see an alternate path for Alex — a normal college experience with a cute new girlfriend. Unfortunately, this distraction is fleeting — Alex is an addict with athletics as her drug. Hadaway allows Alex to remain an obtuse, often inaccessible protagonist so Dani’s desire to understand Alex becomes our own. Alex glances at Dani with the same fierce determination she usually reserves for rowing, but Dani’s glances are softer, filled with curiosity and yearning. This is a bleak movie but their flirtations provide moments of light. We see how much Alex has to lose — if only she weren’t so determined to win.

This year Demi Lovato came out as nonbinary and starred in a docuseries about extraterrestrials. (They find the term “aliens” offensive!) But amid these very queer events, Lovato also found the time to take one of the year’s hottest photoshoots. They met actress Allie Marie Evans at a party where she and boyfriend Tyler Shields must’ve done the artsy version of “Hey, my girlfriend saw you from across the bar and we really dig your vibe.” Shields’ black-and-white photos of Lovato and Evans have big k.d. lang/Cindy Crawford energy and I’m obsessed. Lovato is wearing an oversized suit with only a lacy bra while Shields is in a black dress, black tights, and black heels. The best photo of the bunch has Shields glancing down at Lovato, thumb in their mouth, as Lovato looks back up at her. I’m so happy for Lovato that they’ve gotten to be their full self this year and so happy that their full self is this hot!

One of the strengths of this new CBC/HBO Max show is that the protagonist Sabi (show co-creator Bilal Baig) is still figuring things out. They’re figuring out their career and their family and their relationships and their gender. They’re bad at expressing their emotions and have walls up with even their closest friends. The one exception is Bessy (Grace Lynn Kung), the mother of the kids they’re nannying, whose sudden coma begins the season. During the first episode, before this tragedy occurs, Bessy visits Sabi at the bar where they work. She gets Sabi to open up and there’s a vibe. Maybe openly queer Bessy just likes being friends with a young queer person to get away from her heteronormative family life. Maybe Sabi just wants to be Bessy instead of be with her. I’m not trying to label this dynamic because this is a show that thrives beyond labels. All I’m saying is their glances back and forth felt lesbian to me and even if neither of them are interested in consummating those glances, the mutual gender envy is still very gay!

Before it explodes into a bizarre and boundary-breaking exploration of masculinity and family, Julia Ducournau’s second feature — and second masterpiece — opens as a twisted sort of lesbian rom-com. We first meet Alexia (Agatha Rousselle) as she walks into work — a large lot of cars with half naked women grinding on top of them. One of her coworkers, Justine (Garance Marillier), glances up at Alexia before a patron gropes her. “Touch with your eyes!” the bouncer instructs and then Alexia dances and we do just that. Afterward, we get one of the most creative meet cutes I’ve ever seen: Alexia’s hair gets caught in Justine’s nipple piercing. These glances of struggle and pain, all but bleeding with lust, perfectly underscore the film’s underlying themes. Ducournau’s work is as much about desire as it is violence.

The second season of Lena Waithe’s BET show was funnier, deeper, queerer, and better than the first. One of the many impressive things it pulled off is that it actually made me invested in the relationship between Hattie (Jojo T. Gibbs) and her former boss Ida B. (Sophina Brown). Now, I’m not saying I ship them or that their relationship is anything but a mistake on top of a mistake but oh my do they have chemistry. Episode two begins with a devastating glance from Hattie toward the camera. Then a glance back with a smirk from Ida B. Back to Hattie. Back to Ida. Hattie. Ida. Hattie. They’re playing cards. Hattie is winning and Ida is getting competitive. They’re in the gay version of pajamas — sports bra/big sweatshirt, workout shorts/cute sweatpants — and they’re adorable. Is the relationship advisable? Again, no. But any couple with glances this good are hard to resist.

Speaking of couples that probably shouldn’t be together, the first season of Feel Good ended with Mae (Mae Martin) and George (Charlotte Ritchie) rightfully deciding to take some space. But upon returning to England, Mae is having regrets. It seems as if George has moved on and Mae will have to do so as well. That is until George shows up to Mae’s show to recreate their first encounter. Sitting across from one another in the abandoned comedy club, the former and soon-to-be-reunited lovers look at each other. They continue what will be the first of many role plays, the whole scene simmering with sex and tension. Their glances are filled with so much regret, so much wanting, so much love. The entire season finds these two working to move beyond their toxic patterns and forge a healthier bond together — it’s moments like this that prove that effort is worth it.

Nothing makes my group chats explode like when Janelle Monáe goes live on Instagram. And on May 31, she gifted us with something truly special — an invite to her pool party. Smoking a cigar, Monáe basked in the sun surrounded by women. At first, someone else is operating her phone camera, but then Monáe takes over. Her guests are glancing at her and each other all the while Monáe is making deep eye contact with us. Is deep eye contact a glance? Literally, no. But it certainly heightens all the other glances happening in the background! Three years after releasing Dirty Computer and coming out as a “free-ass motherfucker,” Monáe seems to be living the queer fantasy she deserves. And if you missed the Instagram Live, I’m sorry. She was nice enough to post a photo of her with the cigar, an unidentified butt behind her, our sole digital souvenir from the event.

It may not have been as flashy as Euphoria or as nostalgia-inducing as Gossip Girl, but this year HBO Max canceled its best teen drama. In the back half of its first season, Genera+ion settled into a rhythm, trusting its incredible young cast to tell grounded and inclusive teen stories. It became a truly great show with a truly great couple at its core: Greta and Riley. They may have spent the whole season exchanging pained glances, failing to communicate as queer teens are wont to do, but by the end they finally did! And they’re in love! Greta is one of the few asexual, homoromantic characters we’ve ever seen onscreen and I wish we could spend more time with her. Haley Sanchez as Greta and Chase Sui Wonders as Riley were both so good and so good together. And those glances!! They captured the angst of being a teenager and having all the feelings in the world, most of which you don’t understand. The show may be over, but if you’re a fan of great writing, grounded performances, and lesbian glances, these 16 episodes are a necessary watch.

This silly list has an official ranking exclusively so I can emphasize that in a year replete with lesbian glances Niecy Nash and Jessica Betts won hands down. The coming out/relationship announcement may have been in 2020, but 2021 belonged to this couple. Every week — multiple times a week, even! — they posted something on Instagram that would be an all-time swooning moment for most famous couples. The way they look at each other like they’ve always just finished fucking and are just about to fuck again makes me think that’s literally the case. Lesbian glances may be known in our culture as secretive expressions of longing, but Niecy Nash and Jessica Betts are here to remind us that when you’re really in love every single day can have the romance of an epic — without all the emotional torture. Just watch this video. WATCH THAT VIDEO. I rest my case. Congrats to Niecy Nash and Jessica Betts on being so in love and congrats to all of us for getting to glance at their glances all year.

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