Samaritans’ Post

It's so weird to me... How the super certain tragedies like death is mostly kept as an irrelevant part of a professional platform like LinkedIn. Everyone deals with death - of a closed one, of a family member, or of a friend. And regardless of how much we try to keep emotions aside, we are emotional beings and most of the tasks we perform, be it work related or not, are operated by the emotions related part of the brain. ~ There comes a time where your profession takes a back seat and you just think about what life really is. (you can even get existential crisis). ~ There comes a time where bereavement is all you can think about. ~ There comes a time where job hunt, to-do lists, strategies or promotions are the last things you wanna think about. Thus, we need more and authentic discussions on how to deal with such times, not with strategy but as a HUMAN. #bereavement #worklifebalance #human #death

Leaving a job you love can lead to "transition grief," a feeling of sadness and loss that’s very real. It’s a natural response to parting with valued colleagues, projects, and a beloved workplace culture. Acknowledging these feelings and giving ourselves time to adjust is crucial. Let’s support each other through these transitions, embracing new beginnings with resilience and optimism. ——- The feeling of sadness when leaving a job you love is often referred to as "transition grief" or "workplace separation grief." While it's not a formal medical diagnosis, it shares similarities with grief experienced during other significant life changes or losses. This type of grief can include feelings of sadness, loss, and anxiety about the future. #CareerTransition #WorkplaceWellbeing #NewBeginnings

𝐃𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐆𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐟: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐒𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐉𝐨𝐛 𝐋𝐨𝐬𝐬 Job loss often leads to a form of disenfranchised grief – grief that isn't openly acknowledged or socially supported. This can make the healing process even more challenging. Grief isn't just about bereavement; it's about loss, and we can experience loss in many ways. When we lose a job, we lose more than just employment. We lose: • 𝐅𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲: The immediate concern is often financial stability. Without a steady income, the stress of meeting daily expenses and long-term financial goals can be overwhelming. • 𝐑𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞: Jobs provide structure to our days. Losing that structure can lead to feelings of aimlessness and disorientation. • 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐲: Many of us derive a sense of identity and pride from our work. Losing a job can result in a loss of self-esteem and social status. • 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐒𝐨𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬: Workplaces often serve as social hubs where we form friendships and professional networks. Job loss can lead to isolation and loneliness. • 𝐏𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐌𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: For many, work is a source of purpose and fulfillment. The absence of this can leave a void, impacting mental health and overall well-being. Understanding that your grief is valid is the first step towards healing. You deserve a space where your feelings are understood and respected. As a counsellor working with disenfranchised grief, I provide a safe and supportive environment to help you navigate these complex emotions. Let's talk about how disenfranchised grief might be affecting you and explore strategies for healing. #GriefSupport #DisenfranchisedGrief #JobLoss #MentalHealthSupport #Counselling

Day 4: Black Holes to Avoid 🌑 When you encounter these gaping holes of unhealed pain in someone, walk away before you get sucked in. You could lose yourself, a huge price to pay. Do you have time to take on a full-time unpaid job enabling someone’s lack of personal responsibility, with no notice or severance package when they have no further use for you? Do you plan to collect new traumas to heal from at this point in your life? What would happen if you unlocked all the energy you pour into them and gave it to yourself and your goals? You are worth it. You matter. You deserve to be treated well. *more black holes: abuse and neglect, unhealed grief and loss (including exes), unmanaged (ignored) mental or medical conditions that could leave you a full-time caregiver, victim mentality/blameshifting, continued harm to self or others, disregard for others’ feelings and needs, violating boundaries, self-centeredness, taking people’s time/energy/resources without giving value, history of using + discarding people, disrespectful mindset or behavior. These are serious, and in my experience ALWAYS get worse as the person gets comfortable with your tolerance. Healthy people do not have black holes that destroy themselves and others…we’ll talk about that tomorrow. 🌌”People Are Not Constellations” is a series of shorts looking at relationships objectively, based on data you have ⭐️. You’ll feel less lost in space as we journey into getting to know someone. Join tomorrow for Day 5: Beautiful Nebulae 🎆 the heart of growth. #worklife #lifecoach #relationshipcoach #friendship #dating #partner #relationships #selfgrowth #coworkers #character #quality #loyalty #bff #goals #love #healing #trauma #abuse #neglect #selfesteem #addiction #betrayal #adulting #mentalhealth #attachment

If you've recently handed in your notice to leave teaching, you might be going through a grieving process right now. You might find yourself confronted with feelings of resentment, or even anger. This might show up for you immediately after making the decision to move on, or it might take a few weeks for these feelings to develop. Both of these scenarios are completely normal when navigating grief (as is not experiencing these feelings at all so don't worry if that's you either!) The best way to deal with resentment and anger as part of the journey of career change loss and grief recovery is simply to allow those feelings to come up, and deal with them in the way that works best for you. Talking it through with trusted loved ones, or others who are in a similar boat to you, as well as journaling your thoughts and emotions can be a really healthy way to process resentment and anger. Yesterday I spoke about how challenging it can be to work through our feelings and look to a new future whilst we're still in the school environment and feeling exhausted. If this is the place you're in, and you don't have the capacity right now to explore any of these complex feelings, then it's also okay to put them on a shelf until the Summer holidays roll around. That said, I would definitely recommend finding a way to delve into them at some point. When we bottle those feelings of anger and resentment up, we can let those stories and instances drag us down and end up taking them with us into new roles. Find a healthy way to release how you feel at some point over the coming months and you'll be in the best position to head into your next adventure. Do you recognise any of these feelings that often accompany the grieving process? #NoticePeriod #TeacherNoticePeriod #TeacherWellbeing #MixedFeelings #TeacherCareerChange #CareerChange #TeacherBurnout #NavigatingChange #Compassion #SelfTalk #PositiveSelfTalk #BeKind

What does 'rock bottom' mean? It is only really with the benefit of hindsight that we can look back and see just how difficult things were at a particular point in our lives. If you have been through an especially traumatic experience (such as a bereavement, a break-up, or financial troubles) then this might have given you a sense of how bad things can get - and yet also, how resilient you are and how you managed to cope. Perhaps you are going through a difficult time right now? But, even though you are struggling, you have to push certain worries to one side because you HAVE to keep working - and there is no alternative but to keep going, for your own and other people's financial security. If you find yourself battling, with every ounce of energy that you have, then how much longer can you keep doing this before it gets too much..? Asking for help isn't an easy thing to do. But...it can be life-changing to have the support of someone who is separate from your friends, family and colleagues - someone you can say anything to, and who is not only a qualified counsellor but has also worked for many years in a pressurised job and understands what it is like to balance a stressful job with issues outside of work. You aren't alone. To learn more about how Purpose sessions can help you - or people you care about - through a difficult time, please get in touch. #wellbeing #mentalhealth #purpose #mentoring Steve Twinley

“I will be eternally grateful that I found you, and for the support. I am so much more able to cope with life’s challenges as a result.” Life doesn’t stop sending you curve balls! But knowing you can deal with whatever comes your way – that’s Gold. My client has worked through major bereavement, and overcome lifelong patterns, and now coaches herself through difficulty, because I’ve shown her how. That’s pretty cool, eh? A major turning point for this client, was when she moved from “self-denial” resilience, to “self-supporting” resilience. There’s a huge difference. Self-denial means suppressing, trying to stop feeling things or hoping that feelings will go away. It works for a while but takes a huge effort and when you get exhausted you feel overwhelmed. Self-support means accepting difficulty as part of life and learning strategies to support yourself better. It’s about high performance and sustainable resilience. If you’re fed up of being told to build resilience, and would love to listen to the voice inside but worry that you’ll fall apart if you do, then we should talk. This is my zone of genius! I’m looking for 2 Women who are ready to learn the high-performance habits of self-support in the next 60 days. Comment YES! if that’s you. #selfsupport #resilience #highperformancehabits

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well - Robert Louis Stevenson The picture in black & white reminds me that even as a 6yr old my eyes focusing towards the cameramen had accepted that “yes” life is tough but so what…this has been my mantra for my life’s journey. Obstacles in life will always be there, it is only their dimension that differ, despite this I knew that even if you were born into a life full of obstacles, the most important thing is to turn all the obstacles into a wonderful chapter in your book of life. This year the my mother suddenly died, turning my life upside down, it didn’t crumble. Death of a loved one is like loosing a “limb” you suddenly have to learn to live with this emotional disability. As a leader it also taught me & gave me the opportunity to reflect on the kind of policies we have towards bereavement, what is grief and how little is understood. We give people 2-3weeks sick leave for physical wounds but emotional wounds because they are invisible & harder do measure are often ignored. Employees expected to be back at work within 2-3days. Moral of the story is every challenge carries the opportunity to learn & ultimately build “Resilience “. #leadershipculture #resilience #healthcare #grief #griefawareness #mentalhealthawareness #womenempowerment

I am overwhelmed (in a good way) by the responses I got on yesterday’s post. So many interactions, comments and even direct messages saying how much it resonated. If it shows us anything it is that anyone struggling with any of the things I talked about is not alone. So many other people are finding it hard at the moment. It doesn’t need to be one big thing like redundancy or bereavement, it can be a build up of lots of “smaller” things. One thing I know from my experience is that if I had not had 3 weeks off over Christmas something would have broken. I was broken, I would not have been able to carry on pretending to be ok. My work would have suffered, things would have started to slip, I would have become completely overwhelmed and dependent on how my employer had reacted I would have been fired and/or had some sort of breakdown. I needed to rest I needed to stop I needed not to have to worry about being good at my job so that I could mend. Sometimes when we are struggling we are scared to let go of something or put something down for a while in case it is not there when we come back. Often overwhelm hits and instead of taking a step back and thinking I can’t do all of this right now we plough ourselves more into work or family issues because we want to fix it. But it is so much harder to fix something if you are broken yourself often it all ends up broken including you. It is ok to pause, it is ok to rest. It is ok to do what is right for you. Lots of employers are so much better when it comes to mental health these days. If you have a good manager that gets it,. Talk to them, can you take some time off. If you don’t work for such a great  company and are in a financial position to do so think about what you need and can you afford to take time out completely. Give yourself the space to mend.

It’s Loneliness Awareness Week, so let’s talk about it. Most of us will feel lonely at some point in our lives. You don’t have to be alone to feel lonely. You can feel lonely in a crowd, with colleagues at work or with your friends and family. You can feel lonely in your relationship. It can be a part of life at any age. Feeling lonely can sometimes be triggered by things like going to university or moving to a new place, retiring or changing jobs, going through a bereavement or a relationship break-up. Sometimes it can have no specific trigger at all. It’s important to know that there are things we can do to help ease feelings of loneliness and feel connected to ourselves and others. Here's how 👉 https://bit.ly/3LX8ZxJ We're always here on 116 123 if you need someone to listen 💚