Helen Barnes’ Post

I failed* miserably the first time I coached someone 🤦♀️ ... It was a one day coaching course I went on as part of my grad job at PwC and I loved it and was totally sold on the power of coaching. The course ended with a supervised session of me coaching a social entrepreneur who wanted to set up a community rental centre. I thought I had smashed it, I was asking all these 'great' questions and giving them good ideas - ‘Have you thought about doing X?’, ‘Why don’t you do Y?’, ‘What if you did Z?’.... I remember the supervisor's look of horror at the end 😮 , and they said something along the lines of ‘that was the exact opposite of coaching - you asked leading questions, gave your advice and opinion framed as a question and you disempowered the client from coming up with their own answers’ (though they said it more tactfully than this…) This probably spurred on the next 8 years of my career figuring out how to bring more of a coaching approach into my roles as a consultant and sustainability lead. I’ve now gone full time as a coach and having done a lot of courses and practice, for me, coaching is about: -- Being a thinking partner for your client where they lead the discussion -- Actively listening, being present, holding space for people to think and not interrupting them -- Asking open questions, being curious and non judgemental -- Building a trusting relationship where people feel safe to be open and explore themselves at a deeper level -- Partnering with a client to work together to create the change they want in their life. How often do you talk to people and feel like they have some kind of agenda for you or that they are just waiting for you to stop speaking so they can respond or they want to give you advice or share their opinion? And how often do you feel like someone is there to just listen to you, with their full presence, with no judgement and no agenda for you, who just wants to help you work towards whatever you want? ^^^That’s coaching, and having had a lot of coaching myself, it is a refreshing way to be with someone and has been completely transformational for me. It’s a privilege to be able to offer that to people. If you’re looking for a coach (and a recovering advice-giver 😅 ) to be present, listen to you and work with you on whatever it is you want to get from life, then do reach out! *And maybe there's no such thing as failure … only learning 😊

I never would have started my coaching career if I didn’t “burn the ship.” The phrase "burn the ships" comes from Hernan Cortes, a Spanish conquistador, who famously ordered his men to burn his fleet to eliminate the option of looking back or retreating. There were only two options for them - fight or die. For me, it meant committing fully to my dream, with no fallback. After attending a training in 2018 and reflecting on my years as a marketer in the corporate world, I felt a strong pull toward coaching. With some savings set aside, I “burned the ship.” I resigned from my corporate job and dove headfirst into building my coaching career. At that time, coaching was niche profession, often confused with psychology. There weren’t a lot of opportunities available for coaches yet. So it was a huge calculated risk from my end, and I didn’t have space to be complacent. To kickstart my journey, I poured all my time, effort and energy in getting started → I conducted coaching sessions in exchange for coffee. → I founded Purpose Coaching and began posting on social media. → I even created my own website. Despite these efforts, I eventually returned to the corporate world…but this time in HR. 🤔 Did that mean my attempt to “burn the ship” failed? Not at all. For one, this bold move led to the creation of Purpose Coaching, my own brand through which I've been able to guide and support numerous clients in their growth journeys. Exploring coaching equipped me with skills and experiences that jumpstarted my transition from Marketing to HR—a significant leap toward my big goal of becoming a full-time coach. If I didn’t go all in, I would have stayed in the marketing and sales role. A safe choice, yes, but not as fulfilling for me who felt called to helping people transform and grow through coaching. So perhaps I don’t 100% agree with Hernan Cortes. “Burning the ships" doesn’t mean you never ever look back. It just means you go all-in and you pave a new path forward, one brave decision at a time ✨ The journey isn’t linear but each step is meant to bring you closer to where you’re meant to be  If you're standing at a crossroads in your career, asking yourself whether it's time to "burn the ship," but you're not sure what to do next, I'm here to help guide you. I’ve been there and I know that deciding to make a significant change can be daunting and it helps to talk to a coach who can give you clarity and support. Book a free consultation call with me, and let’s explore your options together! Link in the comments below 💙 #careercoaching #careercoach #careerguidance

If you were to ask me what my ‘ikigai’ (reason for being) is, I would say it is coaching in a heartbeat. It is that one thing I do – besides parenting – that makes me get up and invest my time, talent, and treasures in because I absolutely love helping people become their best versions. Coaching is where I get to channel my activism and avoid getting jaded, believing that I am able to transform the world through others. So as we celebrate International Coaching Week, let me share 3 of my favorite moments in my clients’ coaching journeys— (1) CHANGE ALREADY HAPPENS EVEN BEFORE OUR FIRST MEETING. Sometimes, a high-achiever who is struggling with accepting feedback comes to coaching. Other times, an extremely helpful leader who is always on realizes that it is time to draw boundaries and schedules a conversation with me in the middle of a busy weekday. In such instances, I would say that the mere act of engaging a coach is already a step towards vulnerability and self-compassion. Paraphrasing Rumi, the Coach arrives when the client is ready. (2) FROM AHA! TO A STATE OF FLOW When I was a more novice coach, I marveled at the Aha! moments. This later became tricky as anyone who’s been coaching for a while would know that there will not always be these moments. These days, I find myself in awe when clients start shifting their thoughts and getting into a state of flow. It is as if something happened in the conversation that unlocked a rich reserve of insights. (3) SUBTLE AND LASTING IMPACT Concluding coaching journeys is always bittersweet. Back in my early years of coaching at the cafe downstairs of my old condo, I recall observing the subtle changes in clients as they entered the door. It could be the spring in their step, the light make up, or the hint of smile that replaced the crease in between their brows. These days, both present and past clients who recently reached out have noticed a change in how they are now responding to adversity. A delayed flight no longer bothers as much; they remain calm and proactive even with news of another company change, layoff, or just what is happening the world. *** Another recent thought is that even when there are thousands of coaching content generated everyday, there is still so much about the profession that remains a mystery or is misconstrued. I hope that this post reaches not only my peers, but also those who have yet to experience the joyful wonders of coaching. So here’s a Coaching 101 for you 👇🏼👇🏼👇🏼 https://lnkd.in/g4TgyUn4 International Coaching Federation #ICF #InternationalCoachingWeek #ExecutiveCoaching

Getting unstuck by exploring your many parts 🤔 Think of a moment when you were stuck. As you talked to a coach or a friend, you gained new insight into your stuckness, and with the liberating energy of this insight, you were able to do what it took to move toward your goal. Getting unstuck can be so easy! 💣 However, it doesn’t always work out that way. Sometimes you remain stuck. Where in your life are you continuously struggling with something? It could look like this: A part of you says “Yes” and another part of you says “No”. "Do it" and "Don't". It’s like a battle of two minds inside of you. You might even accept this deadlock as “the way it is”. Through our own self-leadership development work, we’ve found that stuckness is a rich trailhead. It is the starting point of a deeper dive into our inner complexity as it leads us to the systemic forces that have us crave something, yet that also work to strongly prevent us from attaining this very goal. 💥 You can unstuck your most intractable inner dynamics 💥 One of the practices that we’ve introduced into our coaching is Parts Work, based on Dick Schwartz’s IFS (Internal Family Systems) model. It has led to great breakthroughs for clients who have a limiting belief that holds them back from living the life they want. Or who feel like a fraud as they climb up the career ladder. Or who cannot make a decision as they are paralysed by conflicting inner thoughts. 💡 IFS acknowledges that we all have multiple parts, that we are not a unified one person. It has shown that when we befriend our parts, even the ones we struggle with, we access our calm, creative, and confident core Self. 💪 And that's a game changer, because now you're able to navigate your inner complexity and to make choices from your calm, confident Self. In turn, you raise your leadership and your ability to deal with the growing complexity and uncertainty in our world. We’re excited to take our Parts work coaching to a new level through a 6 months coaching training. Parts Work coaching brings the deep and lasting change you long for. It heals the old wounds which prevent you from reaching your full transformation. It helps you access the calm, confident, and creative Self that lives inside of you. Do you want to give it a try❓ 👉 Schedule a complimentary coaching session: https://lnkd.in/eQfPhAkV

Have you ever wondered why you sometimes experience your leadership like driving with one foot on the gas and your other foot on the brake? Parts work helps leaders open new paths as they begin to differentiate and understand the competing needs of the different voices (i.e. parts) inside us. Yes, we all have them. Super excited to be starting this training and becoming better able to serve the leaders and organisations we work with.

Now it's time for me.........💜 For a while, I've felt like I haven't been reaching my full potential. I'm so accustomed to achieving and smashing my goals that sometimes I forget my "why" — the reason I'm so determined to help others. It's easy to lose sight when life throws you a curveball. Being a high achiver is exhausting and many of you can relate. There is alot of psychology around this but I'll not bore you. Helping people develop their leadership and mental health is my passion. Building relationships and witnessing the success of those I've mentored gives me immense satisfaction. Seeing others thrive because of my guidance is deeply rewarding. Becoming a trainer allowed me to elevate my leadership and coaching skills to new heights. When I became a trainer and taught people the CAM methodology, it was like the cherry on the icing on the cake. Seeing coaches start new businesses and witnessing their success was an absolute dream come true. Celebrating their victories has been incredibly fulfilling. Yet, the challenges of the cost of living crisis, wars, and political issues have meant our industry has suffered. But these are skills for life. I’ve watched coaches adapt and change direction in a commendable way, demonstrating resilience and innovation. I am so proud of everyone I have trained. When the economic downturn hit, my business and projects dried up. I couldn't just sit still. My desire to help people and make a difference burned even brighter. My son, the reason I became my own boss, started high school last September. This newfound freedom has given me the opportunity to utilise my skills further. Nothing I do is ever wasted. I've helped hundreds of business owners, CEOs, and legal professionals take charge of their lives and prioritise what's truly important. Now, it's my time. YES MY TIME. know your value. I've achieved a lot in the past ten years: business boss, award-winning coach, published author, and kick-ass trainer and educator. I've realised that I'm a bit of a control freak, and while I'm pretty good at business coaching, training, mentoring and leadershiip. Yes, I am a very special trainer who goes above and beyond. Helping people seems to be what lights me up inside. I've very much enjoyed running stress and resilience workshops for executives. helping them get their life back on track. I know I've been putting other people's needs before my own and this has to change. I have no idea what opportunities will come my way, but I sense change is on the horizon, and I'm trusting that the universe has my back. I don't know if what I've jumped into will fulfill me and meet my needs, but I'm off to a really good start. Doors are starting to open and I do find myself smiling again. Trust the process Hails. Keep evolving until you find your happy place. I can't wait to share what I've been up to. Hails xx

It has been nearly a week since I received my Hudson Certified Executive Coach certification. A week ago, my colleagues from the cohort and I were finishing our final exams, celebrating with champagne, and hugging/crying with pride after closing out this massive achievement. In the week since returning home from Santa Barbara, I have been doubling down on business development now with my program behind me and an exciting new future of executive coaching ahead. Coming soon, I’ll be sharing updates to my website, new opportunities to stay in touch, and continued reflections on work, business, and the human growth journey. While I’ll leave the business teaser there for today, I will share one reflection that has continued to feel true for me as I deepen my work as a coach: Everything, and I do mean *everything*, is inextricably connected. And the more I embrace this deep universal *knowing*, the more I find that I can be a better coach for my clients. The more I come to understand my role as a coach, the more I see that all the wisdom and knowledge that ever existed exists today, right now, inside each one of us. Inside my clients as well as in myself. But in order to harvest that wisdom the key is *connection*. While it is possible that that the answers to everything we seek are already there inside of us, it’s often hard to access without a mirror to show us what's there. That is in some ways the role of the coach. To connect on a profoundly present and human way with the person sitting across from us such that all truths can see the light of day. The gift we offer above all of our knowledge and expertise and years of experience and certifications, is the gift of our true, pure, authentic presence. This is where everything is connected and everything comes to the surface. As a coach in my practice, I have been working deeply to embody this. So to hear colleagues from Hudson comment and acknowledge on my “presence” in the coaches chair, I feel deeply validated and seen (thank you to my SLG!). To be in presence and connection with another human is the act that heals all wounds. And thank you to my clients who continue to trust me and allow me to show up with presence, compassion, and Self. This is why this work is so meaningful. It is a gift that keeps on giving and I am grateful to have found myself on this path. How do you cultivate deep, true presence for yourself? What does presence mean to you? How do you embody connection and presence? Let me know in the comments!

To change the Narrative these questions must be asked. #skillsdevelopment #motive #mindsetchange #narrativedesign #purposefulliving

Are you a leader or a coach? If so, this post may be of interest to you. How often do you stop and reflect on how your social origins, your values and beliefs, and your education may be impacting you? These all colour how you coach and possibly who you coach and who you have your most successful interactions with. I am sure like me, you have had clients who have made you feel more nervous than others, the ones that you possibly need to gain more gratification from, to know you have made a difference to them. When we get this gratification from those kind of clients, we feel amazing, however, when we do not receive gratification from certain ones, this is when imposter syndrome may kick in. And instead of inviting imposter syndrome in with open arms and asking the right questions to understand it, we attempt to shut the door on it, and hope that it will go away. And as you know, it doesn't go away, it stays and comes back to haunts us. What if this is thwarting your business opportunities and limiting your ability to reach out to a wider range of clients? Or this mindset, maybe even holding you back from changing your niche, because you hold the belief that you are not confident that you can practice in a certain area because of not being good enough, competent enough or educated enough. (or some other enough!) If you can relate to this, I am wondering how you deal with these kind of situations, how do you understand yourself at a deeper level? As a coach, I want to be sure I am doing my best to practice ethically and professionally. I choose to deal with these kind of situations, by taking them to my coaching supervisors Dr Susie Mitchell, Pam Lidford & Debbie Inglis so that I can spend time working on any coaching or personal issues, which allows me time to reflect and gain insight on certain issues. I leave my sessions, feeling so much lighter, I don't always have the answers I need and that's alright, as those answers often take time to percolate, however things tend to move quicker once I have taken time to rest, reset and reenergise. This is another reason as to why I became an accredited Coaching Supervisor myself, because I love supporting and challenging coaches and leaders to hold up that mirror to themselves, so they grow and become more self aware and spend time connecting deeply to their feelings, so they can gain a fresh perspective, to feel ready to go again. Without supervision, I can go down the path of guesswork and intuition, which alone can often compound my issue at hand. Kellie Nedelcoux (Hick)Gaby Dutton-Williams (Assoc CIPD) Kirsti WennClaudia Neira Torne @Lesley newlove Joe Hart Viji Mahalingam Rebecca Imhof Russ Magnall ✔️ If you want to learn more about supervision, you may be interested in my next Coaching Supervision Programme, which commencing on Monday 11th September at 12 noon till 1.30pm, it runs for 6 months and I still have a few spaces left, if you are interested please reach out.

Hi dear Community,   I embark on a coach certification journey and am open and eager to take on five new clients to work with during the certification in the next six months (August to February 2023).     What's in it for you?   ✅  6-12 x 1-hour sessions at a significantly reduced rate* with a supportive and experienced coach to help you with professional development challenges, a situation – either in personal or professional life where you feel stuck, can't make a decision, figuring out what you truly want, what your next career move should be, etc. ✅A partner to support you in gaining clarity and momentum and, finally, moving from inaction to achieving the goals you set for yourself.  ✅ Access to state-of-the-art coaching techniques, tools and resources.  ✅ My unwavering support and belief in you in the journey of achieving the goals you set for yourself. *As our work together will involve me going through my own learning process, I'll be reducing my fee (I don't tend to work fully fee-free as it is crucial for the client's commitment).   Benefits for me:    ✅The opportunity to use newly acquired skills and to gain experience. I will need to record our calls for supervision purposes.  ✅Your feedback. As part of the alliance, I would ask you to let me know what is and is not working for you.  ✅The knowledge that I am supporting someone in realizing their full potential.    Here is a bit of info about myself:    I am Anna, a Trained Co-Active Coach with 80+ hours of practical coaching experience and 10 + years of leadership experience with Fortune 500 companies (Unilever, Carlsberg, LEGO, Schweppes), where I led and built brands, managed complex projects and numerous stakeholders as well as hired and mentored a diverse group of talents. After over a decade in marketing, I pivoted my career into coaching and education to pursue my aspiration of developing capability and potential in people.    As an expat and ambitious woman, I have experienced numerous transformations in the past seven years - finding a job and fitting in a new country; transitioning into a working mother; burnout and post–traumatic growth, change of the industries, entrepreneurship – in the pursuit of finding my passion and realizing full potential.  I know how many frustrations, disbeliefs, going in circles, and feeling stuck change can bring.   And as a coach, my goal is to help you embrace this change and go through it firmly, standing on your values and strength, knowing your WHY, and having a clear strategy to achieve your goals.   So if you are interested or know someone in your network who may benefit from this offer – please do not hesitate to reach out.  #lifecoaching #careertrasitions