Cindy Gallop’s Post

I have been watching the discourse around the use of the word 'girl' for a little while. At first, I confess that I had an older 'woman' reaction to the use of girl for everything including math, for the reasons stated in the article. We have fought hard and long for the rights of women. However, I can also see the rejection of the social identity of 'woman' and I love it. I am more drawn to the fun on TikTok than the recipes/decorating/mom-shaming tendencies of Insta so I have witnessed some fabulous critical thinking related to masculinized constructs. The idea of young women/girls reclaiming a life and a world that is created through their lens, and rejecting that of an old system that does not even account for their presence much of the time, is truly interesting and even radical, when it comes to gender equity. But it is also sad that becoming a 'woman' has become a symbol of so much negative conditioning that girls, even those of us in our 50s, don't really want to 'grow up'. From the article: "On sections of the internet, it feels like the word “woman” is being rejected for representing fixed ideas, outmoded notions of identity. This isn’t just about the rows that happen deep in the weeds of gender politics, but on the bubblegum side of culture, too. Girls – or sometimes “girlies”, an even girlier name for the girls – are having fun bonding on TikTok while the women are stuck on Instagram, getting served endless dull posts about prosecco-themed wall art for kitchens."

Eye Opening Truth’s About Women 1. She Needs to Know Every Day, "He Would Choose Me All Over Again" Even confident women in strong relationships face insecurities about being chosen again by their husbands (82% according to some surveys). Women feel reassured by daily gestures of love. His simple, daily actions of pursuit (e.g. taking her hand) can often prevent that insecurity in the first place. 2. Women Want Emotional Security More Than Financial Security A woman's primary need is not financial security but emotional closeness. Research shows that 70% of married women said they were willing to face financial challenges for deeper relational intimacy. 3. If She Wants Less Sex, It's About Her Brain Chemistry Not His Desirability Where men often have "assertive desire" (tied to testosterone), women often have "receptive desire." She enjoys sex just as much when it's happening, but doesn't think about it as much and needs "anticipation time" to have the same interest. 96% of women who wanted less sex than their husbands indicated that it had nothing to do with his desirability.

Dark secrets that make women unique and dangerous. One beautiful morning, I saw this guy on my street going to the store close to my house, he bought 100k worth of stuff and he called this  beautiful Aunty to come pick them up.  The one thing that surprised me is that when this  Aunty came she started insulting him and calling him Names. It made me wonder why this man was not  Loved even with all the effort he makes to ensure this Aunty Happy. From my interactions with experienced and Beautiful women, I came up with Women Darkest  Secret. Even if I knew women don’t like it. If this secret is all lies, I would love all women to signify Where I’m wrong, and let’s argue it out!! ✅ Women can never love two men at the same  time. It's always one. If you're not- you're not.  There is no other way. ✅ Women love sex more than men but they pretend about it. ✅ Women don't want to face rejection, insult, and embarrassment. No matter what. They always find someone to save  them and take the blame. ✅ When she loves you. She smells everything that  touches you including your clothes. ✅ Don’t try to argue with a woman because  Trying to win will only hurt you. ✅ When you cheat on her. She doesn't hate you. She hates that woman you cheated with. ✅ Your performance in bed matters most to her, so do your best to always work on your performance!! ✅ Women will easily leave a man they love. But she will never leave the man she admires, Because women don’t love. ✅ Women's nature loves change so she is always ready to explore new ways of living, sex styles, and new things. Lead her right!! ✅ Women know when and what you want. They're made that way. They just like to act fools. ✅ What others think of her matters to her the most. She doesn't want anyone to hate her. So when you hate her she will want to change your opinion and in the process will fall in love with you.  That’s why they love Bad boys because they know every man will naturally be kind to them. #women #relationshipadvice #secrets #awakening #awareness #psychology #matchmaking #contentwriting #contentcreation

Several friends have asked me recently if I saw the Barbie movie and what I thought of it. I finally did see it and honestly was left with very mixed feelings. Below are my brief thoughts and would love to hear from others what you think: 1) I love the fact that this generally-feminist movie has turned out to be a billion-dollar success. People's votes in America are politically stifled but Thank Capitalism that our wallets are not stifled! We're voting with our money and our wallets say we want MORE movies and things that represent women as heroes, success stories, powerful, and whose stories are the center, not the side-line. 2) I appreciated that patriarchy was displayed for what it was: - demeaning to women - based on immature ideals - celebrating a random social construct (male gender/maleness) with no actual basis for superiority (same can be said for all social constructs, including race, age, that create false superiority based on random demographics) 3) They tried to create an equivalent flip society - the Barbie world was one in which women got all the awards and political power, the real world was supposedly the opposite, with men receiving all the power and awards. However... it was not at all the exact opposite. In the real world, men could get power and accolades without having to try all that hard, whereas in the Barbie world women actually did earn each award or position. Hmm.... 4) When Barbie first entered the real world with Ken and noticed how poorly she was treated, she experienced something Ken never did in the Barbie world. Not only was she not taken seriously, but she was also sexually harassed, threatened, and intimidated. Ken never had to deal with that in either world. Hmmm.... 5) Between scenes related to the above and how women had been treated over a lifetime of sexism, control, and harassment, and the "deprogramming" that America Ferrera's character offered women to extract them from being pulled back into internalized sexism, I felt a visceral reaction of both pure validation and pure anger: both equally valid feelings. In most movies displaying a woman "overcoming" sexism, I usually just feel positive feelings of relief, joy, power, excitement. In this movie, they didn't let you get too excited. You couldn't just slip into a fantasy world. You could not forget that in real life, all that sexism, threat, and harassment is still there. Ultimately the only pain that Ken felt that caused him to seek to uphold the patriarchy was his own ego of not being fully noticed and appreciated for who he was. It wasn't because he was in constant danger of being harmed, or fear of losing his job for not fitting an impossible mold or because he got pregnant. Just ego. Women don't want the opposite of patriarchy. Women want equity, including to feel just as safe walking around the world as men.

Barbie provides an expectation for an unattainable body type. Nearly all commercials contain images of unrealistic thinness, encouraging girls to internalize the thin ideal. Besides being extremely thin, Barbie has large breasts and a tiny waist. Especially alongside age inappropriate and sexual themes, this message validates the trend that women’s bodies are judged and sexualized more than men’s bodies, which contributes to the objectification of women.   Accepting male entitlement and female subordination facilitates violence, abuse, and rape, and may cause women to experience self-blame and helplessness.Barbie commercials provide explicit messages about the expectations associated with being female. Rather than empowering young girls to be ambitious, empowered, and virtuous, the commercials emphasize the importance of sex appeal, fashion, and relationships. #barbie #barbiemovie #barbiethemovie

Women, what did/ do men tell you is wrong with you? What did you discover intread? Let’s make a list for the younger women!! I was told I was too emotional. I learned that it was just that I cared about a bigger circle of humans than the competitive guys deemed important. I was told I was unreasonable. I learned that competitive reasoning and collaborative reasoning are often at odds. Collaboration looks unreasonable when you think you are fighting a war. I was told “that’s subjective.” As if subjective issues aren’t worthy of attention. But all human emotions are by definition subjective. And emotions like love, trust, faith, and hate matter too much to leave to “if you can’t measure it, you can’t manage it” dogma. Your turn…. Disclaimer: Yes, gender is a continuum. My only goal is to protect our Gen Z daughters from harassment. And no, not all men. https://lnkd.in/e79_yFcE

The future is bright. Last week, in the middle of watching a podcast, I saw a clip of author Caitlin Moran on the Lorraine Kelly show. The snippet was hand picked, so I am loathe to make a judgement on the rest of Morgan’s work, but the dialogue was centred on how terrible men are and how bad role models for boys are the reason men are toxic. One comment was (and I think it’s paraphrased from her book) “girls have Beyoncé as a role model and boys have Andrew Tate”. She was holding this up as a good thing for girls and a bad thing for boys, in case you were wondering. The world has changed. Women like Moran are no longer leading the future for girls. She focuses solely on trying to “fix men”, by concentrating entirely on fabricated interpretations of masculinity. She is a bad actor and a dinosaur. Instead, in the real world, online- where the future is being played out- women like Louise Perry have a far greater share of voice. Hyper intelligent, articulate and drawing on data as well as insight, she is painting the opposite picture of what the mainstream media and culture still believes feminism is. To Perry and the rest of us, feminism has achieved some great things- yet it has become something it never was. Moran’s trope is to uplift women by berating and belittling men. Perry’s mission is to educate girls on what she believes is the mid to long term futility of sex positive feminism and a misandrist view of men and deep, uneducated view of masculinity. She is young, educated and concise and I believe she is the future for not only women, but for men. If you care to understand women, Perry’s work will give you honesty. If you want to rack up useless points for some misplaced allegiance to the side of pro woman/anti-man- then read Moran’s out dated and toothless campaigns. The sad truth is found in Moran’s wide-eyed belief that “men have Andrew tate and women have Beyoncé” is a good thing. She said “…he makes boys believe that winning is important” and yes, she was holding that up as a bad thing to teach boys. Perry and the new wave would tell you all the reasons Beyoncé may not be that good for women. She would dig deeper than the surface. Which is of course why the future generations are flocking to Perry and away from women like Moran. They have seen and felt the failure from a culture that tells women to value womanhood above family, humanity and togetherness. Highlighting once more, that there are no good conversations happening on TV and they don’t want them. The dying embers of a failed attempt to divide men and women, boys and girls. A dying culture perhaps. Long live Perry and the new feminists. Holding men to account and rightly so, but from a place of compassion not resentment and doing the same for women too. Holding us all jointly to account.

As women, especially mothers, we often feel like we have no choice but to store up everything we are feeling, bad and good, because there is always someone else that needs our attention more than we do... Or so we tell ourselves. The problem is... Whatever we say, if we don't make time to address the emotions, stories, habits, etc., that are weighing us down, we will end up damaging our physical health in the long run, harming or upsetting those closest to us, or both. Are we really prepared to keep paying that price? If not, you need a space to do so, and you are a fellow black woman, join the Black Women Venting Room on WhatsApp using the link below: https://lnkd.in/ef6rr4CS Today's live call at 1pm will be on the theme "Why women need other women". If you are a woman from another ethnic background, DM me to see how I can support you or your community in creating a venting space. #eliminate #offload #ventitout #emotionalbaggage #letitgo #emotionalhealth #blackwomenventingroom

On Empty People Women who try to attract attention by sharing or presenting their half-naked bodies (social media) under the pretext of covering up their insecurities, educational and informational deficiencies, lack of love and ignorance! In order to look cool and attract attention, these men, who have never opened and read a book in their lives, who are quite devoid of research strength, who cannot get out of their own point of view, who may seem full on the outside but empty inside, with the girls they hang out with to cover these shortcomings, with a style that completely commodifies them (what is meant here is that the girls they are in a relationship with are the source of their self-confidence and consider this as ingenuity and oppose it. they don't see sex as different from a sexual object), empty men who post pictures with expensive cars, watches, and places, and think they can get whatever they want (mostly in the context of a relationship with the opposite sex) with their muscular bodies! Sexist, ultra-fanatical feminists who say that it is only men who commodify women, ignore the fact that women also commodify themselves (which is promised to them in a creative context) and aim to spread misogyny! Hypocrite, devoid of thinking, too blind to see that inherent differences are an obstacle to absolute equality, or too cowardly to see that men and women should be completely equal. In short, hypocritical Hippocratic feminists who do not accept the truth and hide behind their lies! Doesn't the fact that some women (especially those with low levels), who are in considerable numbers, display their bodies just to attract the attention of the opposite sex, to take advantage of the opposite sex and to arouse the opposite sex, show how helpless and devoid of love they are? And how devoid of morality? I think it shows;) A man should know how to take control of the chains of sexuality and desire that surround him sometimes, so that he does not become a toy in the hands of women. (One of the greatest weapons of women is their body, sexuality and femininity, which they know very well how to use) and sometimes they should know how to say no so that they can be a completely independent and free individual