Your team member is resistant to your coaching feedback. How can you break through their barriers?
Encountering resistance from a team member when you provide coaching feedback can be a challenging hurdle. As a leader, it's crucial to understand that resistance often stems from underlying issues such as fear of change, lack of trust, or misunderstanding the feedback's intent. Your role is to navigate these barriers with empathy, clear communication, and a commitment to your team member's growth. By addressing their concerns and reinforcing the value of their contributions, you can foster a more receptive environment for development. Remember, effective leadership isn't just about directing; it's about guiding your team through their professional journey with support and understanding.
Building trust is the cornerstone of overcoming resistance to coaching feedback. Start by establishing a rapport with your team member. Show genuine interest in their perspectives and acknowledge their accomplishments. When trust is present, feedback is more likely to be received as a gesture of support rather than criticism. Ensure your feedback is consistent and fair, and give them space to voice their opinions. By demonstrating that you value their input and are invested in their success, you create a foundation of trust that can make them more open to your guidance.
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Focus less on feedback and more on productive dialogue: the ability to navigate perceived conflicts with empathy and understanding. When teams discuss sensitive issues without taking things personally or becoming defensive, they are more likely to make rational decisions and foster positive communication patterns. Effective dialogue leverages cognitive diversity, ensuring team decisions are made by harmonizing different perspectives and priorities.
Active listening is not just about hearing words; it's about understanding the message behind them. When faced with resistance, engage in a dialogue where you truly listen to your team member's concerns. This means giving them your full attention, refraining from interrupting, and responding thoughtfully. Through active listening, you may uncover the root of their resistance and address it directly. It also shows respect for their viewpoint, which can soften their defensiveness and open the door to constructive conversations.
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I think active listening is the key to understanding the resistance. Showing that we truly listen and care for what the client has to say, helps him/her to open up. Once we identify what is the cause of resistance, we can bring it up and help the client address it directly. It's important the client understands the benefits this brings to his/her own personal & professional development.
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La escucha activa implica prestar atención no solo a las palabras, sino también a las emociones y preocupaciones que se esconden detrás de ellas. Esto puede ayudar a crear un entorno de confianza y apertura. Reconocer sus preocupaciones y validar sus emociones puede ayudar a reducir la resistencia y mostrar que sus puntos de vista son valorados. Hacer preguntas abiertas que animen a la persona a expresar sus sentimientos y pensamientos.
Sometimes resistance arises from a lack of clarity about the goals of coaching. Ensure your team member understands the objectives behind your feedback and how it aligns with their personal and professional growth. Discuss the bigger picture and how their role contributes to the team's success. By setting clear, achievable goals, you provide a roadmap that not only guides their development but also gives them a sense of purpose and direction.
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Establecer un diálogo abierto y honesto puede ayudar a desarmar la resistencia. Esto incluye ser transparente sobre tus intenciones y estar dispuesto a recibir retroalimentación sobre tu propio enfoque. Explicar claramente por qué haces ciertos comentarios y cómo pueden beneficiar al miembro del equipo.
Offering support is essential in helping a resistant team member embrace feedback. This could involve providing resources for skill development, setting up mentorship opportunities, or simply being available for further discussion. Let them know you're not just their coach but also their advocate. When team members feel supported, they're more likely to take risks and apply feedback because they know they have a safety net in place.
Encouraging ownership of one's development is a powerful way to break through resistance. Empower your team member by involving them in creating their action plan based on the feedback given. This participatory approach fosters a sense of autonomy and responsibility. When they have a hand in shaping their growth path, they're more likely to be committed to the process and less resistant to the feedback that fuels it.
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It’s most often the case that the team member learns better by doing rather than just listening. Feedback stings sometimes but sit down with your team member and turn feedback into a roadmap for success by brainstorming action steps based on the feedback. This way they are in the drivers seat shaping their own development and support them in their actions, encouraging when they have been able to successfully tackle the specific feedback point. Ofcourse all this is assuming the leader has already built trust by actively listening to their side of the story and has done the work of reframing the feedback as an opportunity.
Consistent follow-up is key to ensuring that coaching feedback is taken on board and acted upon. Schedule regular check-ins to discuss progress, address any new concerns, and celebrate achievements. These follow-ups reinforce the importance of the feedback and show your ongoing commitment to your team member's development. It also provides an opportunity to adjust the approach if necessary and keep the momentum going.
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This area of follow up is where many of us fail. We errantly assume that we have done the above 5 steps well (which we may well have!), they now own the issue and there is nothing else for me to do. Demonstrating that you care about their development by checking in regularly will go a long way to building trust and developing a strong team that continues to grow alongside of you. Consider your favorite leaders in your own development - didn't they follow up with you?
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Give them some autonomy by offering a menu of options for how they can work on the area you provided feedback on and offer to connect them with training, mentors, or other resources to support their development in the area you provided feedback on
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Asking the team member what resources they would find most helpful could be a good approach. As an educator, I'm aware that one size cannot fit all. I also know that the Multiple Intelligence theory is real. How will I use this knowledge to support my team? It is important to note that while majority of the team might respond well to standard or even personalized coaching, there might be a member with different needs. Probably a book will be a better resource or an online group session or short course. Sometimes we simply have to meet people where they are instead of always thinking that everyone must take the same road we demand them to.
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Aquí algunas sugerencias: 1.Entender la resistencia: Pregunta a la persona sobre sus percepciones y sentimientos hacia el coaching. A veces, la resistencia proviene de malentendidos o miedos que necesitan ser abordados. 2.Construir confianza: Establece una relación de confianza mostrando empatía y comprensión. Asegúrate de que la persona se sienta escuchada y valorada. 3.Explicar el propósito: Clarifica el objetivo del coaching y cómo puede beneficiar tanto al individuo como al equipo. Relaciona los comentarios con sus metas personales y profesionales. 4.Utilizar preguntas abiertas: En lugar de dar instrucciones directas, usa preguntas que fomenten la auto-reflexión. Esto puede ayudar a la persona a llegar a sus propias conclusiones.
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