When words fail, colors speak Since Salek was a child, she possessed an odd ability to see people in colors based on her experience and memories with tWhen words fail, colors speak Since Salek was a child, she possessed an odd ability to see people in colors based on her experience and memories with them as well as the persons’ aura. She describes seeing her father as green and her mother as brown. Some people have colors and others don’t. She explains that she’s not really sure why but it has always been this way.
Chaos in Color is a collection of stories from Salek’s life between 1972 and 2019. Her stories include deep rooted trauma from experiencing abuse, neglect and growing up with a mentally ill parent.
The writing was very simple and uncomplicated with a lot of short, clipped sentences. Despite the content, this made it easy to read but, ultimately, ended up distracting from the storytelling itself and made it difficult for me to ever become fully invested in Salek’s story. However, it is still a beautiful story of love, understanding, and forgiveness. It shows readers the affects of childhood trauma and how, when unaddressed, it can taint adulthood. While it is a rather dark story, Salek finds moments to sneak in bits of light among the chaos.
Thank you to NetGalley for my digital arc. Out now!...more
Washington has always been a very private person and for that, I applaud her. It is because of this that I was surprised she chose to write a memoir aWashington has always been a very private person and for that, I applaud her. It is because of this that I was surprised she chose to write a memoir and share more of her life. This isn’t a tell-all like some might want from her (what memoir even is?) but it is an honest and graceful reflection of her childhood and rise to stardom. In this memoir, Washington grapples with fundamental questions of identity and belonging, echoing the universal quest for self-discovery.
Raised by a father that drank too much and a mother who was constantly adjusting to his mood swings, Washington learned from a very early age how to retreat inside herself and remain invisible. She felt that she had to keep the peace of everyone around her, causing her to cut off her authenticity, abandoning her own emotions and truths. Acting became her lifeline, allowing her to step in to her true self, find her voice, and express herself. She shares her experiences of navigating her sometimes tumultuous childhood and the complexities of stardom, offering a rare glimpse into the struggles and triumphs that shaped her.
Unfortunately, this memoir was a bit lackluster for me. The storytelling lacked the sense of pizazz that I was looking for. There was a lot of build up to the "big family secret" and once it was revealed, it was quite anticlimactic. There were also moments from her life that she deemed necessary to include—her same-sex relationship as an adolescent, her abortion— that she didn't expand on which seemed futile. Overall, it was a fine enough read but it won’t be making my list of favorite memoirs of the year....more
In these essays, Savage explores her ever growing and ever evolving relationships with her Granny and her mother as they navigate the world as Black wIn these essays, Savage explores her ever growing and ever evolving relationships with her Granny and her mother as they navigate the world as Black women. Savage writes about her abuse, her religious path, her breast cancer, her estranged relationship with her mother, Granny’s hallucinations and dementia, and more. In between the rawness, heartbreak, and grief, Savage provides readers with a touch of relief and humor. The essays are spellbinding, deeply compelling, and teaches readers to love with a strong sense of empathy.
Savage includes many guides in these essays including “How to attend a Black funeral”, “How to dispose of a dead bird”, “The Black patient’s guide to avoid being treated like a slut in the street”, and “What not to give someone who has breast cancer”. While they were meant to be slightly humorous, they were also meant to open the readers mind. Specifically, “The Black Patient’s Guide..” made me pause and reflect on the medical system and the care that Black people receive.
I saved so many quotes from this book but because I received this book as a digital arc, they didn’t save to my GoodReads account, so I will share a few of my favorites here:
“If there were a picture of the holy trinity, Granny’s would be a color portrait of Jesus, President Barack Obama, and a police officer.”
“Granny’s insistence on feeding people during her porch sermons reminded me of the Biblical story in which Jesus and his disciples fed thousands of people with only five loaves of bread and two fish. I suppose a dose of Jesus is best served on a full stomach.”
“The scene reminded me of how she used to make me sit on the side of our green tub and scrub my knees and elbows with Ajax to get rid of the darkness. She stood watch in the doorway as I cried and scrubbed, but skin and blood were the only things that came off. The blackness remained.”
I could share many, many more that made me laugh and made me feel deeply but I will stop there. For more gems like this, you will have to pick up the book yourself when it’s out on 11/14/23.
Easily one of the best collections of personal essays that I have ever read.
A beautiful memoir about resentment, regret, and redemption. A marriage between two mentally ill drug addicts that begins in a psych hospital is bound A beautiful memoir about resentment, regret, and redemption. A marriage between two mentally ill drug addicts that begins in a psych hospital is bound to end in madness
In the 1980s, Dana grew up in a broke down trailer with her parents—educated and capable, but troubled— surrounded by bales of marijuana and cocaine bricks. Recruited to work for a drug boss and struggling with their own addictions, trauma, and mental health conditions, her parent's, "King" and "the Lady", left Dana mostly neglected. By the age of four, Dana was sitting at the counter chopping up marijuana for her father and helping him sling his drugs. After all, kids make the best hustlers... "No one expects a runt in a Looney Tunes T-shirt to shank you". When she was six years old, the Lady ripped Dana away from her home and her father and moved her to North Carolina where life only got harder. Living in fear of abandonment by the only parent she had left, Dana grew anxious, angry, and lonely. It wasn’t until many, many years later that she recognized that in order to move forward and accept herself, she had to make peace with her past.
I realize now that... the real danger was in not accepting my parents for who they were, mental illness and addiction and poverty and all. The real danger was in not realizing that they were doing the very best they could with what they had.
Trent had a truly remarkable childhood. Bearing witness to her living through so much neglect and poverty was heartbreaking and yet fascinating to read about. I found it truly inspiring that she was able to turn her own life around after coming from such a rough upbringing. I'm such a sucker for these kinds of stories. The writing style was not my favorite, however. At times, the writing felt choppy and jumpy and, at other times, cryptic and vague, which would make it difficult to follow the story line but overall, I still enjoyed the journey.
Thank you NetGalley for my digital copy! Out 04/16/2024!...more
Joe is just like any other 17 year old boy, attending school in London, when one of his teachers—35 year old Miss P, or Ali—takes an interest in him. Joe is just like any other 17 year old boy, attending school in London, when one of his teachers—35 year old Miss P, or Ali—takes an interest in him.
The formatting of the short chapters and Gibson’s prose, reading like fiction, make this memoir an addictive read. It’s wild to think that in 1992, when all of this was happening in Joe’s life, that it wasn’t an illegal act.
I have some grievances with this book though. The synopsis made it seem as if this is a story about “an abuse of power” and while I am not disagreeing, I feel like what you see is not what you get here. The entire book covers Joe’s two years at this prestigious school and, of course, his relationship with Miss P during his time there. Throughout the book, readers get many intensely detailed scenes of their sex life and it seemed, to me, as if Joe was almost relishing in it. We get pages upon pages of Joe detailing these two years with Miss P only to get to the last ten pages before the word “abuse” is even mentioned and then that’s it. It’s over. While I very much enjoyed Gibson’s storytelling, I wish that we could have gotten more present day reflection from him. This is listed as memoir but memoir is supposed to include reflection on past events and there simply wasn’t any of that here. Perhaps autobiography would be a better description? Part three of the memoir is “17 years later” but it is incredibly brief and left me with more questions than I started with. When did he start to suspect that what happened was abuse? How did that affect him? How did he cope with it (therapy, etc)? What are his thoughts on it now? How did it shape who he became?
Overall, I have no regrets that I read it and I’m glad that Gibson wrote it; I’m sure that it helped him to get his story out there. I hope that it helps those that are in a similar position understand what abuse looks like and that it encourages them to speak out....more
At the age of 11, Axton and her parents became victims of identity theft. Both of her parents' identities were stolen and credits were ruined. ConvincAt the age of 11, Axton and her parents became victims of identity theft. Both of her parents' identities were stolen and credits were ruined. Convinced that it had to be someone that they knew, the family shut themselves off from everyone and adopted a new motto: “trust no one”. Axton later goes off to college and discovers that she, herself, had multiple credit cards opened in her name around the same time that her parents’ identities were stolen. Upon this discovery, Axton is determined to get to the bottom of this mystery and dedicates her education and time to learning more about identity theft.
This is a memoir that has been on my "want to read" list for many years; it was a book that I knew I would get around to eventually. What I think put me off of reading it for so long, though, was my worry that it would simply be a journalistic approach to identity theft and that it would be a slog to get through. But wow, was I wrong. This memoir was so incredibly personal and captivating. I absolutely adored Axton’s writing and the storytelling is exceptionally alluring. A true crime story that will shake you to your core....more
“I always wanted to be a woman like her. The kind of woman who goes to the farmer’s market and buys yellow gerberas or peonies for herself and puts or“I always wanted to be a woman like her. The kind of woman who goes to the farmer’s market and buys yellow gerberas or peonies for herself and puts organic basil in her salad… I wondered what kind of woman I would be like if my mom hadn’t left. Maybe I would have chosen basil over meth.”
Strip is a deeply personal account of a life marked by extraordinary challenges and resilience. Sward courageously shares her story about the traumatic experiences of her youth, her descent in to addiction and her time as a sex worker. Readers are taken on a journey as they witness Sward’s transformation from a young, confused child to a strong, capable woman.
In Part One, we get a peek in to Sward’s childhood and her approach to it was interesting—written from the viewpoint of herself as a child, rather than a reflection as an adult. I quite enjoyed it. The chapters are short but they are jam packed with beautiful, poetic prose (a talent she must have acquired from her poet father whom she adores) and it is searingly honest.
Equally heart-wrenching and empowering. I would strongly recommend this to anyone who is looking for a short, thought-provoking non-fiction read with raw, authentic storytelling....more
A memoir on the misunderstood mental disorder of sociopathy written by a sociopath who has a PhD in clinical psychology? Um, hell yes. Sign me up.
ThrA memoir on the misunderstood mental disorder of sociopathy written by a sociopath who has a PhD in clinical psychology? Um, hell yes. Sign me up.
Throughout her childhood, Patric knew that she was different but she didn’t have the words to explain why. She didn’t feel fear, guilt, and empathy like the rest of her peers and the only way to relieve herself of the intense pressure that she felt in her head was to do something that she knew was wrong: lie, steal, enter peoples’ homes without permission. It wasn’t until she went to college and landed in a psychology class that she learned the word “sociopath” and everything began to fall in to place. From here, Patric began her astonishing journey towards self-discovery.
This memoir is so incredibly well written and is wildly informative. Gagne’s stories and experiences are interesting, shocking and eye-opening, challenging the reader to examine their own views and beliefs of sociopathy. I learned so much that I didn’t know before. Whether you think (or know) that you have sociopathy or whether you don’t, this is an incredible read regardless. I was glad to see that Gagne included how she eventually learned to cope with her sociopathy with the help of CBT and other modalities of therapy. I believe any sociopath (or person who loves a sociopath, for that matter) reaching for this book will find the information helpful. I dare say that anyone out there dealing with sociopathic behaviors and tendencies will feel relief as they read this memoir.
Thank you to NetGalley for my digital copy! Out 04/02/2024!...more
I had heard of the Duggar family in passing because of their popular reality show on TLC. I, however, never watched it and never followed along with tI had heard of the Duggar family in passing because of their popular reality show on TLC. I, however, never watched it and never followed along with the family so I was not at all familiar with their lives. I enjoyed witnessing Jill’s transition throughout this memoir from a young, agreeable girl to a mature, independent woman.
Writing quality was just ok. The amount of times I had to read “Pops” was a bit annoying. There wasn’t a whole lot of meat or substance to this book. There was some but it was mostly repetitive family drama and little stories about Jill’s own growing family. For that reason, I think that followers of the Duggars will likely enjoy this more than non-followers.
dnf at around 60%. This was different than I had expected and I didn't particularly enjoy the formatting of it. There was much more investigative resednf at around 60%. This was different than I had expected and I didn't particularly enjoy the formatting of it. There was much more investigative research and journalism than there was introspection which was a bit of a let down for me. I could have done with way less statistics and a lot more reflection. I enjoyed the stories that she told about her friendship with Darci but between all of the stats, it started to feel like those stories were too few and far between and like she was too far removed from the situation so for me, I had to set it aside. ...more
What a wonderful, refreshingly honest memoir. I adored Ms. Pat’s AKA Rabbit’s humor and loved the way that she was able to laugh at and joke about herWhat a wonderful, refreshingly honest memoir. I adored Ms. Pat’s AKA Rabbit’s humor and loved the way that she was able to laugh at and joke about her past, giving us permission to laugh through our own hardships. Williams is a natural storyteller. I really enjoyed this memoir and I think that many others will too. ...more
These stories started off really strong. I thoroughly enjoyed the first few stories: hearing the history behind this infamous ugly couch, her husband'These stories started off really strong. I thoroughly enjoyed the first few stories: hearing the history behind this infamous ugly couch, her husband's illness, her work in Vogue... But then it seemed to go slightly downhill from there. All of the stories seemed a bit random and I’m not sure that I ever grasped the overall point of them. I didn’t get the “thoughts on moving forward” that I was hoping for or what the author learned from her experiences because there wasn’t much reflection on the events, rather just a statement of what happened. They were still entertaining enough and I enjoyed Passarella’s writing. Most of the essays' subjects were relatively light which was a nice change of pace from all of the heavy personal essays that I read....more
This was a brutally honest look inside a family of 10, all struggling with their own battles with mental health. All members of the family were shamedThis was a brutally honest look inside a family of 10, all struggling with their own battles with mental health. All members of the family were shamed in to silence; they were unable to recognize the signs of mental illness and unwilling to talk about it. This memoir is heavy on topics of generational trauma, depression, suicide, and death.
I really enjoyed Kissinger’s story telling. She does a wonderful job bringing to light how taboo the topic of mental health was not that long ago and, because of that, the limited resources that were available for the treatment of it. This is THE mental health memoir of 2023
Thank you to NetGalley for my digital copy! Out NOW!...more
This memoir begins with the parable, The Blind Monks and the Elephant— teaching us that truth is relative to one’s own perception and because of that,This memoir begins with the parable, The Blind Monks and the Elephant— teaching us that truth is relative to one’s own perception and because of that, we should respect everyone’s perspective, even if that looks different to our own. We really see this come in to play in this memoir with Jed and his mother and their two different beliefs in God and politics. This part of Jed’s story really resonated with me. I, having similar grief with my mother —her shaking her head and saying, more to herself than to me, “where did I go wrong?” anytime I disagree with her religious or political views— found it incredibly relatable. This book poses the very important question that we have likely all faced: How can we love and exist with those whose beliefs differ from our own? Especially when these beliefs feel so fundamental to who we are. I strongly related to Jed’s reckoning when his mother turned 70, of being an adult child and realizing that time is also passing your parents by and that time with them is limited. It’s something that I have thought about almost incessantly since I moved away from home. So I enjoyed the description of the trips that he took with his mother, including the big trip that this book revolved around.
Something that comes up a lot in this book is how Jed publicly discusses his mother and, of course, this book is one big, giant discussion about his mother. Something writers often question is “how do I write about others?” and it’s a question that I have often wondered myself… Until, the other day, I came across a brilliant Substack post written by Suleika Jaouad regarding the ethics of writing about others so I will just leave that here if anyone is interested. https://theisolationjournals.substack... Ultimately, I thought that the way Jed wrote about his mother was appropriate, respectful and permitted.
This memoir is beautiful, candid, unflinching, thought-provoking and often times humorous. A must read.
Half memoir, half ode to Dolly Parton. Melnick braids together reflections of her own past traumas with Dolly’s life and music. The prose is eloquent Half memoir, half ode to Dolly Parton. Melnick braids together reflections of her own past traumas with Dolly’s life and music. The prose is eloquent and addicting. I loved this. ...more
“What is grief, if not the act of persisting and reconstituting oneself?” Ugh, I love a memoir that is full of grief. Grief is what makes us all so hum“What is grief, if not the act of persisting and reconstituting oneself?” Ugh, I love a memoir that is full of grief. Grief is what makes us all so human and connected, in my eyes, and it is palpable in this book. This is a deeply intimate memoir about Maclear’s relationship with her parents and a hunt for the truth after a DNA test reveals that the man she knew as her father her whole life, isn’t actually her biological father. Her relationship with her mother feels stunted —her mother is keeping secrets, doesn’t understand Kyo’s “stories”, and they can’t connect through her mother’s primary language, Japanese— so in order to understand her mother better, Maclear turns to her mother’s love of gardening (of which she knows nothing about herself). I enjoyed a look in to the nuances of their mother-daughter relationship and how Maclear weaves her Japanese roots and lineage in to the story. At times, the writing style seemed too metaphorical and cryptic which would jolt me out of my reading flow and it took me some time to get connected again. In the end, I still found it captivating, beautiful, and worth the read. Thank you to NetGalley for my digital copy....more
lyrical and poetic. some of the chapters went over my head and some were wholly uninteresting as they seemed unrelated but overall, a very interestinglyrical and poetic. some of the chapters went over my head and some were wholly uninteresting as they seemed unrelated but overall, a very interesting approach to memoir that I rather enjoyed. ...more
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