The Grimrose Girls was disappointing. That’s the best way I can describe it. The characters were lukewarm, the plot was simplistic, and the fairy taleThe Grimrose Girls was disappointing. That’s the best way I can describe it. The characters were lukewarm, the plot was simplistic, and the fairy tale connections I was looking forward to failed to inspire any epiphanic moments for me.
This book was a very emotionless journey. The main characters’ arcs felt rushed and padded with filler that could have been removed in favor of making the plot more understandable. The most important parts of the story itself were never explained (for example, everything to do with magic, which everyone eventually accepted and moved on from without explanation). The somewhat vague plot twist makes less sense the more I think about it.
All the side characters existed only to give motivational speeches to the main characters or to die when it fit the plot. I couldn’t tell you anything about their traits or personal lives besides their roles in helping the MCs. For example, Svenja would show up randomly to say things that are supposed to be intriguing but made me roll my eyes aggressively. After her first encounter with Nani, where she led her to her room, she asked for a secret in exchange for being SO generous in that act of basic courtesy. I understand that really rich people act a lot differently, but the characters still need to feel like actual people, not walking plot devices.
The atmosphere fell short of the darkly magical vision I expected. There was an attempt at creating a mysterious and almost pretentiously philosophical aesthetic, but ultimately, it felt totally aimless. (See: Svenja.) Some books have esoteric dialogue with a purpose that adds to a backstory or develops a character’s trajectory. Some books have philosophical exchanges that build a haunting and alluring atmosphere successfully. This book… does not.
One of the major selling points for me about The Grimrose Girls was that there was supposed to be a really deep and meaningful friendship between the main characters. But I didn’t get that. They hardly communicated and acted cold and distant around each other most of the time. I know they were fighting a lot during the events of the book, but if I don’t have any context of how they act when their relationship is stable, how am I supposed to believe they even have this deep friendship? And when Nani joined the group, none of her on-page interactions with the others revolved around anything except the murder, so her sudden friendship with them wasn’t believable to me.
I have a couple of minor gripes that won’t really affect my rating but annoyed me anyway:
❃ Nani being Beauty from Beauty and the Beast doesn’t match to me. She loves books, but does she really? It’s only stated and not shown. She sees this giant library and walks right past it. Her connection to her own fairy tale feels like an afterthought. And also, if she’s Beauty, doesn’t that imply that Svenja, the one transgender character, is the Beast? That’s uncomfortable. ❃ Ella is a scholarship student, which is a big deal at Grimrose because everyone is filthy rich and privileged. But she doesn’t seem to have any plan for her future. I assume she worked really hard for this scholarship, so wouldn’t it align better with her character if she were the one taking all the electives and focusing on job opportunities? Especially since she wants to get away from her stepmother. It doesn’t make sense to have her just drift around with a vague plan to escape when she turns eighteen but no actual drive to accomplish that.
I would have really enjoyed The Grimrose Girls if a bit more time had been spent on developing the things that made it unique. I am unable to care about anything if it’s not developed enough to give me a reason to care. Otherwise the drama has no stakes. All of the elements are present that would make The Grimrose Girls exceptional. But I didn’t spend enough meaningful time with any of them.
In a world where girls who bleed gold are called impure demons and girls who bleed red are only valued for marriage, Deka has always felt like she doeIn a world where girls who bleed gold are called impure demons and girls who bleed red are only valued for marriage, Deka has always felt like she doesn’t belong. In her small-minded village, she faces racism wherever she shows her face. When she turns sixteen, she learns that her blood is gold, and she prepares for her death. But instead, she is taken to join an army of alaki, girls like her who cannot die. They are the only hope the empire has to stop the threat of the deathshrieks.
The Gilded Ones left me disappointed and unimpressed. I really appreciated the ideas behind this book—taking a stand against senseless hatred, banding with other victims to stop the heavily oppressive system—but the execution felt so flat.
The themes were laid out so simply without any subtlety, and they were often exaggerated to get the point across. Characters had dialogue that stated the problem, different characters had dialogue that stated the message. You don’t need to read between the lines for anything.
There is barely any worldbuilding. There’s an empire called Otera, which is roughly split between north, south, east, and west. Guess what the people of these four different cultures are called! Northerners, Southerners, Easterners, and Westerners.
I find it difficult to believe that almost all people in a giant empire are genuinely faithful to a single religion. Yes, it is mandated, but practically everyone truly believes in it anyway. Don’t you think someone would have noticed a problem with this system at some point? How do you get people of separate cultures with differing ideologies and ways of life to wholeheartedly agree with each other about something like “let’s kill all women with gold blood”? This aspect felt unrealistic to me.
Women are not allowed to do strenuous work because they can’t shed any blood before they turn sixteen, but I don’t think this is possible in any setting. For one thing, periods don’t always wait until the day of your sixteenth birthday. And then there are the given dangers of simply existing: tripping, brushing your hand against something jagged, biting your tongue, getting a nose bleed, etc. You can’t just not bleed for years. It’s bound to happen at some point.
None of the side characters were interesting to me. They lacked dimension. Either I couldn’t tell them apart or they were described in such a generic way that there was nothing for me to become attached to:
I miss her so much, miss her voice, her smell, the way she always used to smile whenever she saw me.
What have we learned here? She had a voice. She had a smell. She smiled at Deka. But what did her voice sound like? What was her smell? What did her smiles make Deka feel? This is a common problem that I noticed in the writing. I never felt engrossed in the world.
The side characters were static, with little to no development from the beginning to the end of the book. They were the minor moons and Deka was the planet. (I’m not comparing them to planets and Deka to the sun because they weren’t even that important.) The alaki formed a bond with each other that could have been special and inspirational if the other girls besides Deka had gotten any meaningful page time. I really did like how there was barely any girl-on-girl hate that seems to be so common in YA fantasy, though.
Keita changed his mind about the alaki immediately. He had a few deep conversations with Deka that weren’t even written out, just described with very little detail. Then suddenly, she was the most important person to him. I wish we could have seen their relationship build. Watching Keita slowly move past his prejudices would have been really meaningful. But instead we got a romance subplot that came out of nowhere and left no mark on me whatsoever.
The writing could be very juvenile at times, especially with the extremely grating repetition:
Please let me be pure, please let me be pure. Please let mine be red, please let mine be red. This isn’t the cellar… This isn’t the cellar… Please, please, please let me be able to endure what’s next. Please don’t match me with a cruel boy, or one who hates alaki… Please, please, please… Please, please, please don’t punish us for this. Please don’t ask me about what happened with the deathshrieks, please don’t ask me about what happened with the deathshrieks.
There are much better ways to get these points across than repeating the same word or phrase over and over again. I tolerated it the first time. I laughed the second time. And then I just got really annoyed.
This book was missing a spark, the breathless moment that I look for while reading, the attachment I form to the story or the characters. I liked the concept, but I saw the twist from a mile away. I didn’t end up caring about any of the characters or the romance. Eventually, I was just forcing myself to read it so I could finish it and move on. It wasn’t offensively bad and I see why people enjoy it, but The Gilded Ones didn’t hit the mark for me.
How cruel is it to promise a forbidden wlw romance and an internal struggle between a deep-seated yearning for equality and parents' sacrifice for priHow cruel is it to promise a forbidden wlw romance and an internal struggle between a deep-seated yearning for equality and parents' sacrifice for privilege hardly anyone else has the opportunity to reach for... and then not execute it in an interesting way? I wanted to scream, but I yawned instead.
Dani is the top student at the Medio School for Girls, where women are trained to either become a Primera or a Segunda, the two types of wives each man marries. Primeras run the household, while Segundas raise children. It's a problematic, misogynistic system that a rebellion called La Voz is determined to change. But Dani's parents sacrificed everything to help her gain the privilege of being the Primera for a wealthy politician, and she is torn between two choices: protecting and secretly courting Carmen (the Segunda she is technically married to but isn't allowed to be in a relationship with) and joining La Voz full-time, or being the Primera she was trained to be and staying faithful to Medio.
I wanted to love We Set the Dark on Fire so badly, but it disappointed me. It felt very juvenile. The rebellion was like a romanticized idea of a resistance, but was never explored beyond the surface level. Dani, despite being a "spy" for La Voz, did nothing but accidentally eavesdrop on important conversations. She doesn't do any spying, she's just really lucky and everyone else apparently doesn't care who hears the family secrets.
I was looking forward to the romance, but it lacked something. It progressed so quickly, I honestly thought I had skipped part of the book because Carmen and Dani went from being suspicious of each other to being in love with each other within thirty pages. There was a half-hearted attempt to continue that suspicion, but it ended up just being heavy-handed foreshadowing that led to a very obvious plot twist.
I loved the ideas behind this book. The exploration of privilege, the mythology, the feminism, maybe a glimpse into the grey morality of La Voz. But We Set the Dark on Fire felt very flat and forgettable instead.
2.5 stars
In a battle between two men trying to control her, she'd chosen herself.
The Legend of Lilith is one of those YA books that follows the same standard tropes dutifully, but occasionally adds a spark of uniqueness to keep youThe Legend of Lilith is one of those YA books that follows the same standard tropes dutifully, but occasionally adds a spark of uniqueness to keep you interested. I wish it had focused more on the things that made it good, rather than sticking to the path carved by a stampede of YA fantasy classics.
This book follows a girl named Lilith. She's chosen by the gods to become one of the Divine, humans prepared specifically to fight off the monsters that plague the realm. They are gifted enhanced senses and strength. Meanwhile, an enchantress named Rhéa is struggling to fight off the evil power that threatens to destroy the land.
The first thing I noticed about this book was the odd vocabulary used. It was like the author looked up a normal word in a thesaurus and found the most obscure synonym possible to use. It drew me out of the story, feeling oddly unnatural. Some of the lines used were also cheesy, like the dreaded, "Stay with me, please? Just until I fall asleep." I hate that line with a burning passion. It's used in over 75% of the books I've read this year. Some of the modern language also annoyed me, like the use of "okay" and "hi." The word "okay" was coined in 1839. That was the year when the first photograph of a person was taken. This world has no such technology. It's more of a standard medieval-type fantasy realm. Which is why I don't understand why this language was used. It's a pet peeve of mine.
The magic system was written almost like it was supposed to be vague, but it didn't quite pull it off. I prefer hard magic systems over soft ones, but I'm pretty sure that even if you prefer soft magic systems, this would be a little too undefined still. I'm not really sure how the magic even works. It's called Aether. Lillith is just supposed to "look inside herself" to summon it. I was frustrated. The process of Anointing was unclear. Everything was unclear.
One thing I did like was the father-daughter relationship between Arduen and Lilith. They had a rocky start and I think their relationship was a little in-your-face, but I still appreciated it. It was complex and full of hills and valleys, but the way they stuck together even when they were mad at each other was sweet.
Lilith masters everything too quickly. She had maybe two lessons before she got really good at whatever she was trying to do. This is a common trend I see a lot in YA fantasy, and I don't like it. If a character isn't struggling, I will get bored quickly. She was also a Typical YA Heroine in her stubbornness and determination to do everything all by herself. She wants to defeat the baddie by herself. She wants to save her brother by herself. And deity forbid anyone go after her, because it was hEr fAuLt, which somehow means that she has to take care of it on her own.
It was okay. It wasn't special, it was just fine.
2 stars
I was provided with a free eARC of this book by Phoenix Rising Press, via NetGalley. All opinions are my own.
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This book was nothing special, but I found myself oddly invested in Rhéa's story. Too bad she had literally no role in the book. I am too often disappointed in YA fantasy ☺️
If I wanted to learn how to walk, I would ask WikiHow.
Ah, how I’ve missed Poppy Ballfoyer and Mr. Golden Violates Consent. In this book, they revisitIf I wanted to learn how to walk, I would ask WikiHow.
Ah, how I’ve missed Poppy Ballfoyer and Mr. Golden Violates Consent. In this book, they revisit some of their favorite skills—talking about nothing, insisting the other is lying, and fawning over eyeballs.
My heart stammered as my eyes locked onto his, orbs a shade of stunning, cool amber.
“I’m doing that because I like lying on top of you.” “Well, I don’t,” I bit out. “That’s a lie.”
Kingdom of Flesh and Fire is basically 2000s YA paranormal Wattpad fiction.
How do I summarize the plot when there is no plot? I can’t believe it took an entire book for Poppy to get from Solis to Atlantia. A whole book. A 637-page book. Nothing happened. No character development, no action. Just Casteel and Poppy pretending to hate each other but then kissing every other page.
He smiled up at me, his eyes twin golden flames.
The world’s Twilight phase is finally dying, right? Don’t worry, Twihards. When the world needed Twilight the most, JLA appeared. She’ll save you with her buff vampires and buff werewolves and the biting of lips.
Casteel watched me sleep? Wait.
”That’s creepy,” I murmured. “The watching me while I sleep part.”
She also stole from ACOTAR (uh, like everything: mates, Atlantians, the characters’ personalities) and Shadowhunters (parabatai). Nothing—and I mean nothing—about this book is original.
It turned his eyes from cool amber to warm honey.
The worldbuilding is still just names of real places with a letter changed. Is this trying to be subtle? What’s the difference between a Craven and a vampry? Nobody knows. The language in this book is confusing, as well. It’s a fantasy book, but words like yeah, okay, weird, hey, sucks, lemonade, weirds me out, nope, and wanna are used.
The golden hue of his irises had chilled.
“Casteel Hawkethrone Da’Neer.” *chokes on my cocoa*
Even Rhysand It’s Your Choice But Not Really is better than Casteel. He’s seriously asking Poppy to marry him after forbidding her from leaving the house? And then he honestly believes he’s giving her a choice? He essentially says she’ll die if she doesn’t marry him. He keeps avoiding the question and ignoring her protests and basically forcing her into marriage. Is this a horror novel?
“It’s official,” Casteel said. “I’m going to have to kill him.” “What? Why?” “I don’t like the way he looks at you.” “How does he look at me?” “He looks at you like I do.”
Not Casteel pinning her to the bed and not letting go when she asks him to repeatedly. Not him killing someone for no reason and Poppy forgiving him because sHe BeTrAyEd yOu (fOr SoMeThiNg MiNiScULe) So It’S oKaY.
The intensity in those amber eyes held me captive.
Poppy and Casteel have this game they like to play called Pretend. No, they are not toddlers. Yes, they are adults. Mature adults? Debatable. But adults nonetheless.
They yell at each other and then Poppy asks, “Can we play pretend?” Then they suddenly tolerate each other enough to get married. Communication at its finest.
Speaking of communication, the queen of abusing ellipses and commas has returned! And she’s better than ever ...more
This is one of the most ridiculous books I've ever read.
A Gathering of Shadows picks up where ADSOM left off. Lila is learning how to be a pirate andThis is one of the most ridiculous books I've ever read.
A Gathering of Shadows picks up where ADSOM left off. Lila is learning how to be a pirate and Kell is being angsty. Lila is still telling herself how speshul she is, and Kell is still frowning. Does he ever stop frowning? No.
A tournament called the Essen Tasch, or Element Games, is due to start soon. Lila and Kell decide that they want to participate, so they pretend to be other contestants so they can infiltrate the tournament.
Why though? Seriously. Why? What's the point of this book? The plot literally doesn't even begin until 65%. You may be wondering what happened before then. I don't even know. There were some really short magic lessons. Rhy continued to be an idiot. Over half of this book was pointless. One could even argue that there was no purpose to the magic tournament. The main conflict of this book was the same as it was in the last book. The villain resurrected. Wow. How creative. I'm so dazzled. In the end, they were in the exact same place they were at the beginning of the book. There was no net progress. No character development, no plot development.
In fact, there was character anti-development.
Lila was annoying in the first book, but in this book, she was even worse. She would repeat "I am one of a kind" to herself every time she had a little inner monologue. It was the stupidest thing ever. She was so not like other girls that I almost choked on my cereal.
"My witty banter is one of a kind."
"I've always been unique."
In this installment, Lila learns magic. She excels at it, despite having little-to-no training. Alucard, the captain of her ship, gives her a few lessons and bam, she's a master. Most magicians have to learn the intricacies of the magic system, but Lila is not like other magicians. All she has to do is say a speshul poem and there's the magic. She can use all the types of magic because she is One of A Kind. Everything comes to her so quickly, it's ridiculous. She doesn't have to work for anything. She's all like, "I am an accomplished thief who lives on my wits" when she has no wits. Where are her brains? They don't exist.
"I am one of a damned kind."
"What can I say, I've always been contrary."
She decides to join the Essen Tasch because she wants to have fun. She's been taking lessons for maybe a month, and she thinks she can go against these highly skilled magicians who have been training their entire lives. Every time she almost loses, she finds another speshul power she can use to defeat her opponents. It was so bad I laughed out loud a couple of times from the sheer cringe.
"What am I? One of a kind."
Lila has an inflated sense of self-importance. She thinks she's all that. We're told exactly what we should like about her. She's one of a kind. She's smart. She's clever. She's witty. She's strong. She's powerful. We get it. It's never shown, it's just said straight to our faces via her inner monologue. People keep warning Lila that what she's doing is stupid, but of course she's so smart and clever that she doesn't listen.
"I am not most girls."
Lila has basically no power. She's an elementary student in magic. And yet she's competing with these champions. Who thought this was a good idea? Lila couldn't even be bothered to ask simple questions about the Games before she joined, like how they kept score.
Delilah Bard. One of a kind.
Kell is the worst. He has literally no personality at all. He frowns. That's it. That's his personality. It's repeated over and over again. "Oh, Kell is frowning again." "Kell, stop frowning." "Kell furrowed his brow in a deep frown."
*leaves*
He has the personality of a plastic spoon. He has no sense of humor, no ambition, no dreams, no motivation. He's a blank slate. He had great potential in the first book, but now his entire life revolves around LiLa BaRd. I don't even know what else to say about him because he's so boring.
Rhy is the same stereotype I've seen over and over again. The moody, ungrateful, WiTtY prince who doesn't want to have responsibility and just wants to party. How funny. How creative. *yawns* He's so done with being rich and powerful and whatnot. How boring, am I right? He wants to be a RoGuE.
I hate this cliche. I hate it so much.
Rhy is so ungrateful for being alive. Kell literally SAVED HIS WORTHLESS LIFE, and he basically blamed him for it. Boo hoo. Cry cry. How sad that you were saved.I genuinely wish you hadn't been saved but that's a story for another time. He moans and groans and is a jerk to Kell when he's the only reason Rhy is alive.
The characters were hardly developed at all. They were empty shells. V.E. Schwab's strength is not in character building, but you would think that they would at least be more than shallow cliches. But no.
Everything about this book was bad. The villain revealed his evil plans right before trying to kill the protagonist in an elaborate manner and failing. The magic system was vague and badly written. Who has magic? Who can use it? Nobody knows.
Everyone loves Alucard, but he was just another roguish, attempting-to-be-witty male character who could go wreck his ship for all I care.
The foreshadowing was so stupid. It was supposed to be eerie or spooky or foreboding, but it was useless and it never went anywhere. There was a scene where Lila met this man who was selling mirrors and they had a talk. I felt like that was supposed to be foreshadowing, especially since the really cheesy, actually terrible line "she never told him her name" was used. Nobody uses that line unless they're about to do some horrible foreshadowing. But it didn't even count as foreshadowing because the entire scene was pointless. It went nowhere. Why would you tell him your name? You don't know each other. It's not like you need to be friends to buy a mirror.
There were two female characters in this miserable book and they were both stereotypes. Lila was the Strong MC who hated on all other women for being like other women and still called herself a champion for women. The other female character was a shallow, vapid princess who only cared about her appearance and seducing Kell.
She looked like the kind of girl who would point to something - or someone - and say, "I want one of those."
And then there were these awful quotes:
"I am your captain! You are my crew." The barb struck with unexpected force.
...it's not even a barb, Lila. It's facts. It's just the truth. You're not anything speshul.
0.5 stars
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What was the point of this book? It had no purpose. There was no plot until 65%, and the tournament was the most ridiculous thing. Not like other girls is as common as breathing here.
I was provided with a copy of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.
3.3 stars
༻✧༺
This was fluffy, wholesome goodness.
Ivan works I was provided with a copy of this book from the author in exchange for an honest review.
3.3 stars
༻✧༺
This was fluffy, wholesome goodness.
Ivan works at Galaxsea, a huge corporation that mistreats animals for the entertainment of tourists. Winston is a painter and an activist. He has ambitious ideas, but when he discovers he's Bonded to Ivan, he is forced to figure out his new life.
The plot of this book revolves around an orca named Seymour and Winston's struggle to free him. Ivan isn't willing at first, but as they grow to know each other better, they change in big ways.
I wasn't crazy about the plot, mostly because of Winston and his rude friends. I didn't like how everyone acted like Ivan owed Winston something, like he had to give up his job to be back with Winston. It was kind of toxic, to be honest. You shouldn't have to give up your entire future just to date someone. The main conflict (Ivan working for Galaxsea and not being straight-up rude to a person in a position of power there) wasn't that big of a deal to me and everyone overreacted. Ivan was just protecting his job. If you want to survive, you can't be rude to your boss. And no one should expect you to be, even if the boss is a jerk. Winston and his mean friends shouldn't have held that against Ivan.
Only a small fraction of people are Bonded in this alternate world. Only the Bonded can see color. The worldbuilding was really intriguing and I liked how the activism was centered on the people who can see color and the struggles they face.
However, I have never been a fan of the whole "soulmates" trope, and this book didn't change my mind. If two characters are destined to be together, where's the conflict?? There's no tension or angst or slow-burn. And the romance didn't convince me. Winston said he loved Ivan after maybe five conversations and one date. It was excused because of the bond, but.... *unimpressed*
I did appreciate that the characters were flawed. They all had pretty big problems, but I think those could have been executed in a better way.
I also really liked the writing. It was dryly sarcastic; a tongue-in-cheek writing style that perfectly captured the personalities of the characters and the mood of the book.
Overall, I liked this book well enough, but I wasn't crazy about it, mostly because of the lackluster and sometimes-toxic romance.
This was probably my most anticipated read of 2021, and I was bitterly disappointed.
She Who Became the Sun reminds me of Mulan and The Poppy War, witThis was probably my most anticipated read of 2021, and I was bitterly disappointed.
She Who Became the Sun reminds me of Mulan and The Poppy War, with none of the humor of the former and none of the weight of the latter. Zhu was like Rin, if Rin had less ambition and less personality. There were two characters named Chaghan and Altan, which reminded me of TPW. And a certain character lost a hand, just like in that series... But maybe I'm looking too much into it.
The only character I liked was Ma. Her gentle acceptance of Zhu was touching, and her perspective was the most interesting one to me. The way Zhu finally felt like herself with Ma was beautiful.
Zhu, on the other hand, was a very boring character to follow. She was described by other reviewers as ambitious and power-hungry, vicious and merciless. But I didn't get that. The only time she felt ruthless or clever to me was at the monastery. I'm not sure if I read a different book, but to me, Zhu hardly deserved what she got in the end. She won a battle and all of a sudden, everyone loves her. She didn't do anything to prove herself worthy.
I did like how we never learned Zhu's real first name. That aspect of SWBTS reminded me of Rebecca. It was intriguing to read about how the Zhu of before was considered worthless and how the Zhu of after was something special. However, I didn't like much else about her character. She's let off the hook too quickly when she gets into trouble. Her problems are solved by plot convenience, and it felt far too easy to me.
Everything happened to quickly, in fact. The pacing was abysmal. Battles were over in a few pages, and I was left with whiplash, wondering what had just happened. And then there would be long stretches where nothing happened at all. The plot was directionless and aimless. The main goal felt murky to me. It was just confusing to read, overall. I felt like I was constantly missing something important, even when I wasn't.
The exploration of gender and sexuality was perhaps the best part of this book. But other than that, I was very disappointed. The characters were dull, the plot was weak, and the pacing was dreadful. I wanted so badly to rate this five stars, but I just couldn't.
2 stars
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Uneven pacing, poorly developed plot, lackluster characters, and a healthy dose of convenience come together to make one of the most unsatisfying books I've read this year.
~ review to come ~
I was provided with an eARC of this book through NetGalley by Tor Books. Thank you!...more
This was my first YA murder mystery. I will definitely be reading more.
Truly Devious follows a true-crime enthusiast and aspiring detective named StevThis was my first YA murder mystery. I will definitely be reading more.
Truly Devious follows a true-crime enthusiast and aspiring detective named Stevie who gets accepted into a mysterious school called Ellingham Academy. Years ago, a series of murders signed "Truly, Devious" shocked the community, and Stevie is determined to solve the mystery.
My favorite thing about this book was definitely the atmosphere. It was ominous, unsettling, slightly creepy. Something big was always on the verge of happening. Small clues would appear, slight changes in the mood of the room. It's a little too quirky for my tastes (there was a character whose strange attire was described literally every time she entered the room), but I can see how that worked well for the story.
And the anxiety rep was perfect. Although Stevie was a very dull narrator with not much of a personality, this felt like an OwnVoices book. Mental health rep is very important, especially in books outside of contemporary fiction where these things aren't usually depicted.
Unfortunately, I had to take off a star because of...
David.
*smiles through the pain* David.
I might as well start from the beginning. David is a student at Ellingham who really isn't there for any reason? Everyone else has a particular skill, but he's just there. He has no personality or defining traits (besides being a jerk). He is specifically there to add ~romance~ and ~spice~ and to fail at his only job.
Someone literally got killed and Stevie witnessed it. She was an anxious, wound-up wreck. And he decided that was a good time to make out with her. The logic is not apparent. I am not impressed.
Added to that, David was angsty and had a tRaGiC bAcKsToRy, which is a terrible combination. This was supposed to make him interesting, I believe. It failed.
There was a plot twist related to him in the end that I think was supposed to be shocking, but if you've read any YA at all, you could probably predict it.
Besides, he was nothing but rude and dismissive to Stevie and played the victim whenever she called him out.
Nobody likes you, David.
He's also kind of manipulative, in that he twists all of Stevie's actions - many of which were caused by her anxiety - and makes her look like the villain. He doesn't make an effort to understand her. I am running far, far away.
My only other pet peeve was with Ellingham himself. This book switches timelines between the present day and the past, including scenes with Ellingham. His wife and daughter were kidnapped by Truly Devious, who demands a ransom.
Like a fool, he gives up all his money before ensuring that his family is alive. He doesn't even bring a police force with him. His actions were all extremely stupid, and it annoyed me to no end.
However, I enjoyed this a lot. It was fascinating, dark, mysterious. I'm coming for David with my pitchfork, so once he's disposed of, this book can safely be elevated by another half a star.
This is a contemporary romance between a boy named Elio and his summer guest, Oliver. It's very introspective, dreamy, somehAll I know is pain.
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This is a contemporary romance between a boy named Elio and his summer guest, Oliver. It's very introspective, dreamy, somehow disconnected from the physical world. I hated it.
The writing felt far away, almost--as if Elio's thoughts were from a whole different planet altogether. It's 50% obscure literary references and 50% Elio being melodramatic and angsty. It is An Important Book™.
Elio is a shallow character who is only half crafted. Before Oliver, he was nothing. We know nothing about his life before this summer. He has no hobbies besides transcribing music and sitting next to the pool, ruminating on the secrets of the universe. I'm trying to describe him, but I simply can't, because there's nothing to describe. He's a vessel through which the story is told. He is not a unique individual.
Oliver isn't much better. We hardly know anything about him, besides the fact that sometimes he wears red bathing suits. I don't even know what he looks like. He's American. He always says "Later" instead of "good-bye." I believe this is supposed to replace a personality.
I did not care about this ship. I did not care about Elio or Oliver. The only person I cared about was Marzia, who was basically used by Elio to cover up his relationship with Oliver, which I thought was disgusting. We do not stan toxicity in this household.
The main problem with this book was the lack of humanity. Every character was under-developed. Even the setting wasn't vibrant. I had a hard time distinguishing Elio's thoughts from what was actually happening. It's very contemplative and brooding, but I find that annoying and I didn't enjoy it at all.
I managed to force myself through until I got to the part where Elio compared a peach to a rape victim, and then I decided to finish this quickly, rate it 0.5 stars, and move on with my life.
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Conclusion: Romance is not for me. Another conclusion: Never again.
Destroy Me is the novella that takes place during the events towards the end of Shatter Me. Unfortunately, it's wWell, this exists. I wish it didn't.
Destroy Me is the novella that takes place during the events towards the end of Shatter Me. Unfortunately, it's written from Warner's perspective, which simultaneously disgusts me and makes me want to unsubscribe from life.
In case you're new to this series, Warner is the psycho stalker who also happens to be *ahem* irrevocably in love with Juliette, the protagonist of the Shatter Me series. He had a revelation sometime off-page because all of a sudden he is disgusted with himself (it was about time) and decides to make Juliette love him by being nice to her. Who would have thought. Who would have thought.
This novella is so short and also so problematic. Apparently Warner is the preferred love interest. Adam may be bland, but at least he's not, well... a serial killer with serious problems. I've read some reviews of Adam's novella, and he gets worse. But so far, even though I want to erase both men off the face of the earth, Adam is better. Because at least he isn't evil. I don't care about Warner's tortured past or whatever, that's not an excuse to be a terrible person. He's not even a compelling terrible person, like Cardan or Kaz. He's just bad.
1.5 stars, rounded up because of that one side character who kept trying to get Warner to drink coffee...more
So, I actually didn't hate this as much as I thought I would. I enjoyed maybe thirty percent of it before it all went downhill, but... um... it reallySo, I actually didn't hate this as much as I thought I would. I enjoyed maybe thirty percent of it before it all went downhill, but... um... it really went downhill.
I do not like to think about eyeballs. They just exist. I don't want to look at them. I hate this cover.
But that's irrelevant. The hideous covers are irrelevant. But... is that Adam's eye? Because the only thing I took from this is that Adam's eyes are blue blue blue blue cobalt blossoming bruise clear as the midnight sky blue.
Dark blue eyes dark brown hair sharp jawline strong lean frame.
His eyes are the perfect shade of cobalt, blue like a blossoming bruise, clear and deep and decided.
I've tried so hard to get those blue blue blue eyes out of my head but I know him I know him I know him.
...blue and bottomless...
I'd recognize your eyes anywhere in the world.
He still has the most unusually blue eyes I've ever seen.
...the deep dark blue of the eyes I've learned to swim in.
His natural tan offsets a pair of eyes a shade of blue in a midnight sky.
*aggressive coughing*
Ma'am, this is a Wendy's.
I actually didn't mind the writing, as long as it wasn't about Adam's eyes. The biggest complaint I see is usually related to the purple prose and long-winded metaphors and awkward phrases, but I enjoyed it...? To a point. I thought most of the strange metaphors were accurate, and the somewhat unconventional style of writing really helped to portray Juliette's trauma, which was my favorite part of the book. Too bad it all disappeared when she ✨fell in love.✨ Because that's just how the world works.
I did find some, uh, interesting quotes:
Raindrops are my only reminder that clouds have a heartbeat.
I wonder about how [raindrops are] always falling down, forgetting their parachutes as they tumble out of the sky toward an uncertain end. It's like someone is emptying their pockets over the earth and doesn't seem to care where the contents fall, doesn't seem to care that the raindrops burst when they hit the ground, that they shatter when they fall to the floor, that people curse the days the drops dare to tap on their doors. I am a raindrop.
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Someone picked up the sun and pinned it to the sky again, but every day it hangs a little lower than the day before. It's like a negligent parent who only knows one half of who you are. It never sees how its absence changes people. How different we are in the dark.
I'm wearing dead cotton on my limbs and a blush of roses on my face.
I catch the rose petals as they fall from my cheeks, as they float around my body, as they cover me in something that feels like the absence of courage.
These words are vomit. This shaky pen is my esophagus. This sheet of paper is my porcelain bowl.
1 word, 2 lips, 3 4 5 fingers form 1 first. 1 corner, 2 parents, 3 4 5 reasons to hide. 1 child, 2 eyes, 3 4 17 years of fear.
I wish I could stuff my mouth full of raindrops and fill my pockets full of snow. I wish I could trace the veins in a falling leaf and feel the wind pinch my nose.
Every muscle every movement tightens, every vertebra in my spinal column is a block of ice.
My eyes are 2 professional pickpockets, stealing everything to store away in my mind.
My words wear no parachutes as they fall out of my mouth.
My dreams are bloody and bleeding and blood is bleeding all over my mind and I can't sleep anymore.
The prospect of Adam in pain is like a cold hand clutching my esophagus.
I can shoot a hundred numbers through the chest and watch them bleed decimal points in the palm of my hand. I can rip the numbers off a clock and watch the hour hand tick tick tick its final tock just before I fall asleep. I can suffocate seconds just by holding my breath. I've been murdering minutes for hours and no one seems to mind.
I could jump up to catch a breeze and live in its windblown ways forever.
His lips are spelling secrets and my ears are spilling ink, staining my skin with his stories.
My lungs are sawing my rib cage in half, but I force them to process oxygen anyway.
I take a few bites of oxygen.
My face has been slapped by a hundred hands.
And one of those hands is mine.
It's like... here, I'll write an example.
Here's a normal sentence: "I walk down the cold hall."
Now make it as awkward as possible: "I walk down the hall, the linoleum as cold as the corpses of the women and children they've killed, and my spine conducts enough electricity to power an entire city."
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THE CHARACTERS
Juliette:
I didn't love her, but I liked the portrayal of trauma even though it suddenly disappeared halfway through. She needs to stop thinking in strikethroughs, but I don't have any real complaints. She's frustratingly stubborn at times, but she's a YA protagonist, obviously she's going to be stupid.
Juliette can torture/kill people with her touch. She was locked away at a young age and has lived in solitary confinement ever since. She's a little kooky. I don't really care.
Adam:
Are you serious? I have to choose between an obsessed problematic psycho serial killer love interest and a blander-than-bland cardboard cutout organic whole wheat waffle love interest??
Adam is the organic whole wheat waffle. He's probably better for Juliette than the psycho serial killer, but apparently he's not the endgame LI.
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To summarize his character development, he went from a somewhat interesting mysterious weirdo and Juliette's third grade friend to... a very bland concerning weirdo and Juliette's third grade friend.
This is instalove disguised as we-were-friends-as-kiddos-and-now-I-love-you. Which is probably worse. Adam's entire backstory is that he was hit as a kid once (this was never mentioned again) and he's spent his entire life searching for Juliette. Because logic.
I wouldn't have minded the abuse subplot if it were actually a subplot instead of something mentioned once and thrown away. Maybe if it, I don't know, actually affected him, I would call it deep and move on.
I was okay with him until he and Juliette had a little dialogue sequence. He tried to give her a blanket (this was before he knew that she had magical killing powers) and she told him not to touch her, but he was being all rebellious and she said it again, and then she said this, to which he replied:
"Maybe I don't want you to." He makes a harsh sound. "I disgust you that much?"
When someone tells you not to touch them, you back off. It's basic courtesy and respect. Don't assume it's about you.
Warner:
Warner is the obsessed problematic psycho serial killer. In case you were wondering.
Some of my friends have been telling me Juliwarner is a better ship than Julikent. I beg to differ. Adam may be an organic whole wheat waffle, but at least he's not an edgy guy with problems that could be solved by therapy but he's too tough for therapy so there's that. Ahem.
He's, uh, strangely obsessed with Juliette and continually tries to make advances on her even after she shows no interest in him. First of all, he needs to stop. Second of all, he's blond?? That was random, but since when are villains blond? I was picturing him with black hair until I searched up fanart to see what Juliette looked like and Warner was there with his blond hair. This is not okay.
WORLDBUILDING
What worldbuilding? All I know is that there's something called The Reestablishment, which is a dystopian government that does bad stuff. What bad stuff? Who knows? And apparently the planet is all desolate now because the sky is gray. *looks outside* Oh no, the sky is gray. We must be living in a post-apocalyptic world because obviously clouds aren't a thing.
I didn't hate it, but I certainly didn't like it.
2 stars, get that cover away from me before I actually throw up...more
When someone shoves a book in my face and tells me it's high fantasy, I expect a few things.
1. A thought-out plot 2. Worldbuilding 3. Characters with brWhen someone shoves a book in my face and tells me it's high fantasy, I expect a few things.
1. A thought-out plot 2. Worldbuilding 3. Characters with brains 4. Good writing
According to my checklist, this book is not a high fantasy. It's a.... *checks notes* hastily put-together, jumbled mess of trite tropes traditionally categorized as fantasy. So.
1. A thought-out plot
Princess Lia, terrified of being forced into an arranged marriage, runs away to live a peaceful life by the sea. Because no one will be able to track her. Not even the King's soldiers. And obviously no one in the peaceful town by the sea knows what the missing princess looks like. Nothing about this plan could go wrong. Nothing... at all...
Enter the Prince and the Assassin, who just happened to show up at the same peaceful town by the sea, *the convenience is painful* searching for Lia. The Prince isn't old or decrepit like she was afraid of - he's handsome (oh wow, who would have ever thought). Lo and behold, the Assassin isn't too bad to look at, either! Could... there be... a love triangle? Could... both men... fall in love with Lia? *suspense*
This is the plot up to 15%. And after that, here's what happens.
1. Lia does laundry 2. Lia chops onions 3. Lia bemoans her fate, because how could she possibly choose between the prince and the assassin? There are definitely no other, more important things to worry about.
I'm not joking. This is the entire plot after 15%. *sigh*
2. Worldbuilding
This is supposed to be fantasy. I think. But there's no worldbuilding; just a vague semblance of it.
What I'm given is a bunch of random terms shoved in my face. Of which I remember approximately zero. Because there's no context at all, just names. One might have thought a fantasy novel needed a world...
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3. Characters with brains
The characterization in this book is sooo sloppy. It's like a copy-paste of every other 2000s YA fantasy.
We have Lia, who is exactly like every protagonist out there. She risks the peace between nations because she's worried that the prince might be ugly. And she ruins a perfectly good family heirloom while doing it. She's so predictable that I can guess every thing that comes out of her mouth, and I'm alarmingly good at it.
We have Pauline, Lia's maid, who throws away her perfectly comfortable life with a perfectly kind man to run away with some teenager who has no idea what she's doing. And then she has the nerve to say that this man "will know where she is no matter where she goes," because he "knows her like no other." Excuse me?
We have the Assassin (I lowkey forgot his name), who is also the worst killer in the entire history of killers. He's supposed to murder Lia, because she's risking the peace between kingdoms. But the moment he looks into her ~gorgeous eyes,~ he's lost to lurve. And suddenly he doesn't want to kill her, because she's like no other girl he's ever met before... *gags*
We have the Prince (haha, forgot his name too), who is just... he doesn't exist to me. He has absolutely no personality. I don't even know what to say about him because he's as shallow as a puddle. There's no character complexity here.
4. Good writing
This was just alarmingly, painfully bad. Everything is told straight to my face. There's no depth. And the dialogue is horrible and cheesy and predictable.
I also found a number of plot holes. Lia and Pauline escape too easily, especially since two kingdoms are counting on them. They basically steal a horse and gallop away into the sunset.
And then they ride their horse through a stream to "conceal their tracks." *snorts* A horse is HEAVY. There is MUD at the bottom of a stream. And WATER PLANTS. Smashing water plants and stirring up mud and probably breaking your horse's leg by making it walk over stones is not going to help you at all. But Lia gets all happy because she's being so "clever." And Pauline's like "my lady, you are truly intelligent. So majestic."
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The descriptions were lazy, the pacing was so off, and their entire escape sequence was two pages long. It felt so hastily put-together, as if the editing team just fell asleep in the middle of reading this over. I don't blame them. I would be asleep, too.
~dropping my rating because I can only think back on this book with rage~
*slow clap* That was... something.
I still don't understand all the Lunar Chro~dropping my rating because I can only think back on this book with rage~
*slow clap* That was... something.
I still don't understand all the Lunar Chronicles fans. It's just not that good, in my opinion. It feels very middle-grade-ish, in that the writing is immature, the character arcs are predictable, and the romance is next-level trash.
After the hot mess that was Cinder, I was more than ready to toss Kai in the garbage and move on to Wolf, who seemed better. And then everything collapsed.
Wolf has NO personality. He's known Scarlet for a day. And then they're all like "you will be my alpha female" and a bunch of other cringy mushy stuff. He's an overprotective, violent guy with anger issues.
Scarlet is a hotheaded, impulsive, melodramatic girl, and you all know that's my least favorite cookie-cutter character type. Also, she likes to throw tomatoes. Kai literally has two chapters, in which he manages to enslave the world to a Lunar queen and doom the Commonwealth. Congratulations. Thorne was okay, even though I should technically hate him because he's a sarcastic idiot and I always picture him with that annoying lopsided grin boys with too much confidence like to use.
The world-building was so bad, too. I couldn't tell the difference between France and the Commonwealth. No culture changes, no scenery changes. France could be Antarctica for all I gathered. At least it's Europe and not Asia, though. The world-building in the previous book was supposed to be "diverse" and "inclusive" and ended up feeling very whitewashed and generic.
The plot was definitely better than Cinder. It's getting bigger and more epic, and I appreciate that. Scarlet was also much easier to slog through than its predecessor was.
So... I didn't love this book, but it was a fun read. I can officially say it wasn't a waste of my time. Which is more than I expected.
No matter how much I roast them, I love fantasy tropes. There's something comforting about the familiarity of a Chosen One on a quest to defeat the evNo matter how much I roast them, I love fantasy tropes. There's something comforting about the familiarity of a Chosen One on a quest to defeat the evil, often absent villain.
But that doesn't mean I don't want something new - at least a skillful manipulation of those tropes I love. What The Burning Sky did was nothing revolutionary or even remotely interesting. It was another rewrite of the same old plot, with nothing changed.
As if this wasn't bad enough, the entire beginning of this novel was terrible. Iolanthe summons lightning to fix an elixir, she gets shoved into a teleporting trunk, she meets Titus, who involves her in a plot to "save the world" - it's a mess. A boring, confusing mess.
Once it gets straightened out, we're shoved into a nonmage school, where Iolanthe has to pretend to be a boy in order to stay safe from the agents of the Bane, who is supposed to be the villain. But he only shows up twice, and the prophecy Iolanthe is supposed to fulfill is so vague that it's almost a side plot instead of the driving force of the novel. The whole book is a convoluted mess.
Iolanthe herself isn't interesting either, and neither is Titus. Their personalities? Nonexistent. Iolanthe is pretty much perfect at everything she attempts. She's an expert at cricket on her first try, and why? Because she read a rulebook. Spare me.
The prose here wasn't anything special, either. I found the sarcasm annoying and childish, but the imagery was delightful. It was one of the only things I enjoyed. But Thomas does something with her writing that aggravates me to no end. I'll give you an example.
When Iolanthe first meets Titus, he opens her satchel for her, and she goes on a whole monologue about how he's so "gracious" for a prince, and humble too. But that's literally a common courtesy. I don't understand what's so special about this prince. And Titus does the same thing, too. He starts to tell himself - in his inner monologue - how "clever" and "capable" she is - with no evidence at all to support his claims. It's like Thomas was thrusting a bunch of positive traits in our faces. Iolanthe is awe-inspiring because Titus said so. Titus is gracious because Iolanthe said so. Why did I notice this? I used to write like that too, and believe me, I'm glad I left that phase behind.
In the end, Iolanthe and Titus end up with each other. This isn't a spoiler, because it's pretty much implied when they first meet and Iolanthe starts going on and on about the sparks flying between them, yadda yadda yadda. This book masquerades as enemies-to-lovers, but in reality, it's instalove. Horrible, frustrating instalove.
My main problem, though, isn't with the characters or the plot. It's the world-building, or rather, the lack of it.
What we get is a bunch of random city names and terms shoved at us. The world has no culture or unique customs or anything to differentiate it from the countless other fictional lands I've visited. The magic system wasn't defined, either. Overall, it was such a sloppy world-building job that I almost dropped my book in disgust and disappointment.
The Burning Sky was exactly the same as every other typical fantasy novel out there. Not only did it lack a comprehensive plot, it didn't even bother to manipulate the tropes into something unique....more
First of all, who designed that cover? It's traumatizing.
Anyway, here I am (again), finally done with City of Bones. I DNFed it the first time becauseFirst of all, who designed that cover? It's traumatizing.
Anyway, here I am (again), finally done with City of Bones. I DNFed it the first time because I was so done with Clary slapping everyone. But I'm back.
I still hate it, thanks.
Clary Fray is fifteen years old when she witnesses a murder at a nightclub. (Why would they let kids into a nightclub? Anyway.) The murderer is a boy with eyes "the color of antifreeze." His name is Jace Wayland. He's actually a Shadowhunter, or a demon-killer, and the kid he killed was a demon. She's understandably shocked, and is even more scared when she gets a call from her mother telling her to not come home. When she gets back to her apartment, her mother is gone. She's attacked by a demon, and it's revealed that she is, in fact, of Shadowhunter blood.
I bet you can predict the rest of the plot. It's basically Harry Potter. (I guess there are spoilers in this next paragraph, but it's honestly so predictable that they're hardly spoilers at all.)
- Kid discovers they are special - Kid's parents were also special - The bad guy was supposed to be dead but he's actually not; wow, how original - Special artifacts will stop him - "mundanes" = "Muggles"
TMI actually stands for Too Many Infodumps, because every time Clary met someone knew, they dumped their whole backstory on her and gave us a mini history lesson of the Shadowhunters. There was literally an entire chapter towards the end that was just Luke's backstory.
Clary has a friend named Simon who is absolutely insufferable. Everything he says is sarcastic. He can't take anything seriously. He "loves" Clary. (Come on. We all know the childhood best friends never win in a love triangle. Can we just cut this?) He's been "in love" with Clary for "ten years." (He was five ten years ago.) Why is he hanging out with the Shadowhunters anyway? He has no purpose. There's no point to him being there. His only job is to turn into a rat halfway through. We waste like five chapters trying to save him from being a rat. It was so boring and I didn't care at all.
"Ignore him," Clary said to Jace, and elbowed Simon in the side. "He always says exactly what comes into his head. No filters."
"Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt," she told him.
These kids are fifteen and yet they're going to nightclubs and talking like they're twenty. All of the banter felt out of place.
"'Here' as in your bedroom or 'here' as in the great spiritual question of our purpose here on this planet? If you're asking whether it's all just a cosmic coincidence or there's a greater meta-ethical purpose to life, well, that's a puzzler for the ages. I mean, simple ontological reductionism is clearly a fallacious argument, but-"
Jace is flexing.
Clary is equally annoying. She slaps everyone for no reason and it's supposed to make her "strong." (It actually just makes her a jerk.) She doesn't know she's beautiful (and that's what makes her beautiful). She is not like other girls.
Two teenage girls sitting on an orange bench seat were giggling together. The sort of girls Clary had never liked at St. Xavier's, sporting pink jelly mules and fake tans.
She'd never understood why some girls felt the need to smell like dessert.
She ugly-shames people, despite calling herself less than beautiful on many occasions.
Clary wondered if there were any ugly vampires, or maybe any fat ones. Maybe they didn't make vampires out of ugly people. Or maybe ugly people didn't want to live forever.
Jace likes to call Clary "little girl," despite the fact that they are basically the same age. Can we stop with the condescension? Also, he smells gross:
She was standing so close that she could smell the scent of him, sweat and soap and blood.
Get you a man who smells like sweat and blood all the time.
Jace is not like other guys:
"You may be the only guy my age I've ever met who knows what bergamot is, much less that it's in Earl Grey tea." "Yes, well," Jace said, with a supercilious look. "I'm not like other guys."
*intense coughing*
Only Dorothea knows the truth about Jace's awful sense of humor.
"If you were half as funny as you thought you were, my boy, you'd be twice as funny as you are."
And I can't tolerate characters who treat those without powers like they're lesser. Throughout the book, Jace ridiculed Simon and treated him like he was nothing. There's a saying that you should always judge a person by how they treat people in positions of less power, and Jace isn't looking too good.
Jace leaned forward and banged his hand against the partition separating them from the cab driver. "Turn left! Left! I said to take Broadway, you brain-dead moron!"
What a jerk.
There were some racist incidences that struck me the wrong way, like when Jace met someone Mexican and kept calling him "chico."
The writing was okay, but there was far too much description. If the unnecessary bits were cut out, the book would be half as long as it is now. And there are some... interesting analogies. Like the antifreeze, and like this:
...Jace reminded him, his voice soft as cat's fur.
Some of the description wasn't even good.
The apple tasted green and cool.
*shook*
Also, there was a lot of all-caps screaming, which was extremely juvenile.
"NO POINT?" Clary shouted, so loudly that Simon hid his head under her thumb. "HOW CAN YOU SAY THERE'S NO POINT?"
The magic system was odd. There's this thing called a stele, which is used to draw runes that can heal a Shadowhunter. But it's literally just used whenever the Shadowhunters don't know what to do. There's no definite limit to what it can do.
Besides, there were plot holes. Why did Valentine team with demons if the only reason he was evil in the first place is because he said Downworlders were too demonic to live?
The only good character was Jocelyn because of this:
Jocelyn recognized reading as a sacred pastime and usually wouldn't interrupt Clary in the middle of a book, even to yell at her.
*applause*
Also, there were grammar and spelling mistakes and inconsistencies. Is Shadowhunter actually Shadow-hunter? Because there were different ways of spelling it and I'm confused.
Oh and there was this quote, which made me laugh out loud. (For context, Simon just asked if Isabelle and Jace were dating.)
"Ew, no. They're practically related. They wouldn't do that."
If you know, you know. *muffled wheezing*
0.5 stars
Clary let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding.
__
Yes, I am giving this another try. Why? Because I still haven't figured out who Magnus Bane is and I feel like he's someone I need to know. It's time to dive back into the dumpster.
____
First Read; DNF; 0.5 stars
There's a difference between good trash and bad trash.
On one hand, we have the guilty pleasures, which I usually devour in less than a day. You all know the formula - evil guy trying to take over the world, sarcastic teenage girl who is prophesied to stop him, and a sappy love interest to tie it all off. Let's not forget about the comic relief.
This is my excuse to rate some trash four stars and some trash one star. It's such a fine line and so easy to cross. I can read a formulaic novel and thoroughly enjoy it (because I'm no literary critic), and I can read a different derivative book and want to throw it in the trash where it belongs.
I think you can guess which category City of Bones falls into.
This is the epitome of bad trash. We have Clary, the most annoying, rude, ungrateful girl in the history of annoying, rude, ungrateful girls. She snaps at everyone. She literally runs away to a poetry competition because her mother wants to take her on vacation. Either she has some problems or she's just a ReBeLlIoUs TeEnAgEr, because ALL of us can relate to THAT.
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And then we have Simon, who can only speak sarcastically. No, really. Nothing he says is serious. Everything is a complete joke, and it's not funny at all.
And finally, there's Jace, who I want to throw in the trash along with this book. There is absolutely nothing special about him. He makes bad jokes. He's a "Shadowhunter" *cringes at the cheese* He fights dEmOnS. Yippee. At one point, Clary gets all overwhelmed with how SPESHUL Jace is because he knows what bergamot is. And then he says - I KID YOU NOT - "I'm not like other guys." HE SAID IT. HE ACTUALLY SAID IT.
Oh, wait! Let's not forget the plot! Which is so horrible I want to cry.
Apparently, there's this Shadowhunter who betrayed his fellow demon-murderers and went to the Dark Side. Does that sound familiar to you? Oh, really! I totally didn't pick up on this book's resemblance to Star Wars!
And his name is... drum roll please...
Valentine.
If you're going to make a villain, give him a cool name! Now I can't picture him wearing anything but pink suspenders with hearts on them. Everyone's like "oooo, Valentine is so scary -" NO. HE IS NOT. He is a CUPID.
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We also have a mentor figure who is such a caricature that my brain is exploding trying to comprehend the cheese. I forgot his name.
No, I won't be continuing the series. To everyone's complete and utter shock, I'm not too big on incest....more
In case you didn't know, I have a shelf dedicated to books I have deemed sappy enough to grace Oprah's book club. I nearly put this book there before In case you didn't know, I have a shelf dedicated to books I have deemed sappy enough to grace Oprah's book club. I nearly put this book there before even reading it, because how could it ever redeem itself? It's about WWII! A blind girl! A boy who rebels! A lost father!
Believe me, All The Light We Cannot See is not that shallow.
Theoretically, I shouldn't be this sad. There's no real "war" described here - it's gore-free. Nor is there much physical suffering. But something about this book hit my heart like a bullet.
However, there were some aspects I didn't like, which I'll run over quickly, because they're all small and insignificant, and I'm just being a picky little Goodreadser.
1. Jutta Jutta, Werner's sister, was definitely a side character, but I thought she could have been more. Her story was just as important, if not more important, than Werner's, seeing as so many variations of his story have been written before. She should have had at least a few chapters, but instead we get a sentimental epilogue from her perspective and nothing more. She's treated as a plot device here, and not as a real character. Jutta is simply a motivation for Werner, and isn't given any time or space to grow.
2. The Sea of Flames If Doerr cut out this entire subplot, All the Light would be about 50 pages shorter and a whole lot better. It's much too fantastical; wandering into the realm of magic and curses rather than focusing on what is human and real. Which leads me to...
3. Von Rumpel His character wasn't pointless, but he got on my nerves. He's your stereotypical old evil guy who's obsessed with living forever. Doerr crafted his other characters so perfectly, but Von Rumpel fell flat on his face.
There is so much I love about All the Light. Making a definite list is almost difficult. But you know what's even harder? Preventing myself from raving and ranting about them, as I usually do. You are a logical reviewer, Sofia... get yourself together.
1. The prose I will sing the praises of this writing over and over again until people listen. One of the major flaws (or, at least, personal dislikes) I find in many books is the superfluous complexity of the writing, when simple, poetic prose will always have a stronger impact on me.
2. The format Short chapters. Time jumps. Normally, these things would be turn-offs for me, but Doerr pulls them off beautifully. And the ending is much more of a blow thanks to them. It's genius.
3. The connections and symbolism This book is so fun. Actually, it's really not, but... I've always admired certain authors' ability to connect seemingly random events throughout a story. Anything that makes my brain implode is good reading material. That seems counterintuitive, so I'll stop there.
Well. I didn't rant or rave. I guess I get a gold star. ...more
Nobody: Not a single soul: Radu: My Mehmed. Oh, my Mehmed. I would do anything to see your immaculate face one more time. If only you knew. If only you Nobody: Not a single soul: Radu: My Mehmed. Oh, my Mehmed. I would do anything to see your immaculate face one more time. If only you knew. If only you could accept me as I am! I do everything to gain your notice. My Mehmed.
Repeat approximately 1,384 times to form an accurate summary of this book.
75% percent of Now I Rise is a war. And that's it. Radu spies on Constantinople. And pines after Mehmed. And meets Cyprian, who I didn't really care about. And then there was a battle, which was dragged out for way too long. And then he sees Mehmed again. uNiCoRnS and RaInBoWs.
Yet Lada walks into Wallachia and kills the vaivode in less than five pages. Without any struggle.
Nazira, however -! She's so like Lada, and yet the complete opposite. Unlike Lada, who hates her womanhood and tries to hide it, Nazira uses her femininity as a weapon. She hides in plain sight, almost. It's astonishing. She's the only one with an ounce of sense around here.
I love how Lada is releasing Mehmed the Lying Snake. She's getting more cruel, which is kind of awesome and kind of sad. Either way, it's incredibly realistic. Mehmed deserves to never find love after how he used Radu and Lada.
Overall, I thought some parts of this book improved from And I Darken, but some aspects were horrible. Such as Radu's entire storyline and pointless obsession with someone who will never love him. I'm Team Lada/Herself. In case you were wondering.
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